Do we HAVE to take our baby to be weighed at the HV?

delain

albacookie wrote: »

My sister is a peadiatrician who works in neonatal ICU and SCIBU. She doesn't have kids but plenty of parents listen to her every day.

If I could thank this more than once I would!

I had a Horizon parenting asessment once (long story!) and my worker was my age and had no children. She was brilliant and I like to think that she learnt something from us, because 'textbook' things never worked because of the twins' difficulties. She might not have had any kids, but she was happy enough to 'adapt' the skills she learnt to help particular families.

Even health workers with children can have funny ideas, it's not unique to the childless. It's more the ones with grown up kids who are stuck in the 70's that have the 'weird ideas' issue.

shellsuit

I think what jaibaby is saying, is that if you want advice from someone, it's best coming from someone who knows exactly what it is like, ie having been in the same boat.

Advice for a parent from other parents.

Advice for a cancer sufferer from other sufferers.

Advice for someone whose husband has had an affair, from someone else who has been there dont that and wore the t-shirt.

etc etc...

That's not to say others can't give good advice, just that there's no better advice than from someone who has been through the exact same thing. That's how I read it anyway

thatgirlsam

shellsuit wrote: »

I think what jaibaby is saying, is that if you want advice from someone, it's best coming from someone who knows exactly what it is like, ie having been in the same boat.

Advice for a parent from other parents.

Advice for a cancer sufferer from other sufferers.

Advice for someone whose husband has had an affair, from someone else who has been there dont that and wore the t-shirt.

etc etc...

That's not to say others can't give good advice, just that there's no better advice than from someone who has been through the exact same thing. That's how I read it anyway

i take your point shell

still think its a very narrow minded way of looking at it

not all HV are the same.. as delain pointed out, you will get ones that have their own children that have funny ideas aswell!

it really annoys me at work when women who have a midwife that has not given birth act as if she has no idea what she is talking about!

SusanC_2

thatgirlsam wrote: »

i do think that many HV's stick to the guidelines withour deviation and i find that very rigid.. and while they are indeed there to support you they are also trained to give advice and information

I always think that when they're like that it defeats the point of having them in the first place. I thought one of the reasons for HVs is that they have enough knowledge and experience to be able to tell you when it wouldn't be appropriate to follow the standard guidelines and if they go by the book regardless you might just as well have a book.

Personally I have no idea what my HV is like because I've never met her as I've had no need.

thatgirlsam

SusanC wrote: »

I always think that when they're like that it defeats the point of having them in the first place. I thought one of the reasons for HVs is that they have enough knowledge and experience to be able to tell you when it wouldn't be appropriate to follow the standard guidelines and if they go by the book regardless you might just as well have a book.

Personally I have no idea what my HV is like because I've never met her as I've had no need.

well they do have to work within guidelines but i agree there should be flexibilty

i couldn't stand my HV when i had dd.. she told me off when i weaned at 4 months and said that i should wait till she was 6 months, i carried on anyway

dd started crawling at 6 months and lost weight.. the HV went mad and accused me of not feeding her enough

when i said ' excuse me, you told me not to wean her till now anyway' she had nothing to say!

she was a silly moo

having said that i am not silly enough to think all HV are the same.. i have friends who have had HV's they really got on with and have sang their praises

delain

thatgirlsam wrote: »

well they do have to work within guidelines but i agree there should be flexibilty

i couldn't stand my HV when i had dd.. she told me off when i weaned at 4 months and said that i should wait till she was 6 months, i carried on anyway

dd started crawling at 6 months and lost weight.. the HV went mad and accused me of not feeding her enough

when i said ' excuse me, you told me not to wean her till now anyway' she had nothing to say!

she was a silly moo

having said that i am not silly enough to think all HV are the same.. i have friends who have had HV's they really got on with and have sang their praises

We have a great one, although i've encountered silly ones before.

I must live in a lucky area, the doctors and health visitors are fantastic :T

shellsuit

thatgirlsam wrote: »

i take your point shell

still think its a very narrow minded way of looking at it

not all HV are the same.. as delain pointed out, you will get ones that have their own children that have funny ideas aswell!

it really annoys me at work when women who have a midwife that has not given birth act as if she has no idea what she is talking about!

How does she though? Regarding pain etc I mean?

If a midwife has never given birth, how could she possibly understand first hand what it is like? Just because they have read text books and passed a few exams doesn't give them the right to tell a woman in labour that she isn't in pain, or it isn't that bad.

Not saying all midwives without children are like that btw, but some are.

thatgirlsam

shellsuit wrote: »

How does she though? Regarding pain etc I mean?

If a midwife has never given birth, how could she possibly understand first hand what it is like? Just because they have read text books and passed a few exams doesn't give them the right to tell a woman in labour that she isn't in pain, or it isn't that bad.

Not saying all midwives without children are like that btw, but some are.

i have never met a midwife that has said or told a woman she is not in pain ( sure someone will tell me THEY have!)

if a woman says she is in pain then she is in pain, wether that be real or perceived


its a bit more than reading a few textbooks shell! how condescending is that!?

delain

shellsuit wrote: »

How does she though? Regarding pain etc I mean?

If a midwife has never given birth, how could she possibly understand first hand what it is like? Just because they have read text books and passed a few exams doesn't give them the right to tell a woman in labour that she isn't in pain, or it isn't that bad.

Not saying all midwives without children are like that btw, but some are.

But then you could get a midwife who has given birth with a really high pain threshold. Everyone's experience of labour is different.

A good midwife will be able to tell if your pain is genuinely too much for you whether she gave birth herself or not!

shellsuit

thatgirlsam wrote: »

i have never met a midwife that has said or told a woman she is not in pain ( sure someone will tell me THEY have!)

if a woman says she is in pain then she is in pain, wether that be real or perceived


its a bit more than reading a few textbooks shell! how condescending is that!?

I was in pain and was told I wasn't. OK I wasn't writhing on the floor screaming in agony, but deep down I was crying my heart out and the b!tch wouldn't listen to me.

Later on, I was actually sobbing my heart out, I couldn't breathe properly, I couldn't move, my whole body was in spasm and the cow of a midwife wouldn't even give me gas and air. Midwives like that give the rest of them a bad name.

I didn't mean to be condescending sorry, but I've never trained to be a midwife so I don't know what it entails!