Do we HAVE to take our baby to be weighed at the HV?

Bloomin_Freezing2

What a strange thing she said to you, ignore it. myself, and many others on here would all be put in the stocks and have mouldy fruit & veg thrown at our heads if it were down to her then because we didn't religiously take out babies to be weighed.

I must admit, I didn't have much faith in out HV's either. Things they said seemed silly to me, like waking your newborn in the middle of the night to feed, change their nappy and wipe their face with a damp flannel! Jeez, if my newborns were sleeping there's no way i'd wake them in the night. There were other silly things which I have forgotten now.

Go with what you think is right, it's your baby.

jaibaby

Molly41 wrote: »

Your HV is a professional person who has had extensive nursing or midwifery practice and thus the education/ training that entails and then gone on to do further training and practice to enable her to be a HV.

Not trying to annoy / p*** anyone off, but I personally thinking the ONLY "education / training" anyone who has links to children needs is actual experience. Each and every child is different. They are not all the same. Therefore, no amount of training could possibly cover each and every little thing!!! That's the way I see it. My three are happy and thriving. Tell me I'm wrong..... I will not listen to anyone who has not had experience in looking after a child.

A car has a manual. If something goes wrong, you can normally read how to fix it. But it doesn't take into consideration where it's been driven, who it's been driven by, etc. One manual cannot cover all the cars all over the world. In the same sense, one manual cannot cover every child!!!

jaibaby

Teenie_D wrote: »

Mine too, well she never missed it, she just wouldn't listen to me when I kept saying to her that I felt there was something wrong as DD wouldn't put any weight on her foot. This was at 6 months old. The next time I seen her I mentioned it again but she told me "she will grow out of it when she starts walking"! Went to see doc, straight away she knew what it was and things did happen quickly from there but DD was 1 year old before she got the plaster and it was a complete nightmare, it would have been easier on all of us if she had just listened and the problem was sorted that few minths earlier.

It wasn't the fact that she didn't pick it up, it was that I was just another neurotic first time mother. I found her very patronsing and she really didn't like my DH and never looked pleased when he was around LOL.

My DD was also 1 year when she had to have traction (for 6 weeks) then put into an "A" shape plaster for 8 weeks. They then had to break her leg bone (after having to cut a socket in her hip and forcing her bone up and into it, her leg bone was twisted and her left foot was at a 90 degree angle) after breaking her bone, they had to put a metal pin into it. Then back into plaster for 8 weeks, monthly checkups (after plaster came off) for 1 year, 3 monthly checkups for another year, 6 monthly for 2 years, then two final yearly ones. They finally signed us off just after her 7th birthday, 6 years after first admitting her to hospital.

What annoyed me the most was, after being signed off, we spoke to the doctor. He informed us that research was going on and would we be ok to let them use my DD records. I had no problem with that. 3 months later, we received a phone call from the doctor. He had noticed on her birth records, that the pediatric doctor (who visited us before we left the hospital when she was born) had noted that she had a wonky foot and sent us to physio. Supposedly being the eldest girl and have a wonky foot are two major signs of it!

My DD is 10 now, and although she walks fine, she can't run, her leg hurts in cold weather and she can't walk too long without it hurting. Sometimes I do question whether she is milking it, but she's been in tears.

Lil_Me_2

jaibaby wrote: »

Not trying to annoy / p*** anyone off, but I personally thinking the ONLY "education / training" anyone who has links to children needs is actual experience. Each and every child is different. They are not all the same. Therefore, no amount of training could possibly cover each and every little thing!!! That's the way I see it. My three are happy and thriving. Tell me I'm wrong..... I will not listen to anyone who has not had experience in looking after a child.

A car has a manual. If something goes wrong, you can normally read how to fix it. But it doesn't take into consideration where it's been driven, who it's been driven by, etc. One manual cannot cover all the cars all over the world. In the same sense, one manual cannot cover every child!!!

There are lots and lots of people who are very capable of giving good sound advice about looking after children but you won't even give them the time of day because they don't personally have kids??

You've said yourself that every child is different! So say you have a problem with the development of your child. Do you really honestly say that you wouldn't listen to a HV who doesn't have children, but you would listen to a HV who has had a child with normal development.

Neither of them have got personal experience of looking after a child with developmental needs, but you've already pre-judged and won't listen to the one that doesn't have children. It's amazing you listen to anyone to be honest with you! You'd never go to your GP and say "I've hurt my foot, have you ever hurt your foot?, oh no, then you can't help me".

GobbledyGook

Molly41 wrote: »

Your HV is a professional person who has had extensive nursing or midwifery practice and thus the education/ training that entails and then gone on to do further training and practice to enable her to be a HV.

There will be a reason why she wants to see the baby once a month. Instead of shooting her down in flames why dont you just ask her what her clinical reasoning in behind her request. Then if you dont like it you can question her further. Really in this situation she is dammed if she does and dammed if she dont and your attitude is really not helping the situation.

Sometimes that training doesn't mean to say that they keep themselves up to date.

My most recent HV asked me why I was bothering with the 'faff' of breastfeeding when my baby was 12 weeks old. Apparently he'd got all the goodness he was going too. She told a room full of mothers that getting them onto a bottle of formula with a spoon of babyrice was our best bet of getting a good nights sleep - our babies were between 7 and 12 weeks old at the time!

She also advocates them being in their own room early doors, despite this being in complete contrast to the SIDS recommendations.

Sadly some HV's are nothing short of useless. You get it in every job, but it's a shame they don't realise that in their job they could be the only advice a mother with no family is getting. It seems that practises don't bother to keep a check on what their HV's are advising.

Mine threatened to 'have words with the GP' because I refused to change my baby onto formula because in her opinion he wasn't putting on enough weight. He was putting on weight, having wet and dirty nappies, was alert and was following the same centile line - he just wasn't bounding up them. There was nothing wrong with him at all - she just didn't like not being able to say that he was getting xoz every x hours.

A good HV is a fabulous thing, but they seem to be few and far between in my experience.

If she has concerns she should be sharing them with the OP. She should not be making out like attending baby clinic is compulsory when it simply isn't.

mrcow

You don't have to get your baby weighed at all. I didn't with my 3rd (except at 6 weeks when she saw the GP).

If the doctor is happy enough to see your baby every three months, then that's fine.

I don't let Heath Visitors into my home. Most that I have experienced are complete numpties whose prevalent tendancies are scaremongering and inexperienced ramblings.

shellsuit

Molly41 wrote: »

Your HV is a professional person who has had extensive nursing or midwifery practice and thus the education/ training that entails and then gone on to do further training and practice to enable her to be a HV.

There will be a reason why she wants to see the baby once a month. Instead of shooting her down in flames why dont you just ask her what her clinical reasoning in behind her request. Then if you dont like it you can question her further. Really in this situation she is dammed if she does and dammed if she dont and your attitude is really not helping the situation.

If there was a specific reason why the HV wanted to see the OP's little one, then surely she would be professional enough to have explained that?

And not all HV's are the professional people they should be!

The last one I saw didn't have a clue. She was old and sweet but I knew more than her! She was going from books and leaflets she had on her, she couldn't tell me anything from the top of her head.

I felt like saying; sorry love, no need to waste your time I'm on my 3rd child, I know what I'm doing!

albacookie

jaibaby wrote: »

Not trying to annoy / p*** anyone off, but I personally thinking the ONLY "education / training" anyone who has links to children needs is actual experience. Each and every child is different. They are not all the same. Therefore, no amount of training could possibly cover each and every little thing!!! That's the way I see it. My three are happy and thriving. Tell me I'm wrong..... I will not listen to anyone who has not had experience in looking after a child.

My sister is a peadiatrician who works in neonatal ICU and SCIBU. She doesn't have kids but plenty of parents listen to her every day.

starjumper

Thanks everyone for your replies, much appreciated.

Just to clarify, the HV who visted this morning didn't even look at my baby who was asleep upstairs, didn't ask to sneak a peak at him or ask me to bring him down for a once over, any of which I'd have been happy to do if asked, but I wasn't going to offer to wake my sleeping child just for her.

He is thriving, last week he was weighed at 14lbs at the hospital, he's brilliant and is sleeping a whopping 9 hours at night with a couple of top ups during the day. He rolls over, smiles and "chats" and he's 10 weeks. I think as parents we're doing a good job and he is a very happy baby. I'm not depressed and I don't need the "support" of a HV in order to get through the day. She's not asked to see me every month, if she wanted specific one to one time she'd be making appointments or home visits, she has told me as a first time parent I should be getting my baby weighed monthly. I think this is unwarranted and it looks like most of the posters have agreed with this and said they didn't bother so much.

If I had a concern about him, his weight gain or development I would go to the HV weighing and advice clinic but I don't, and I don't really see the point is going unless he needed to. In his 10 weeks he's had more going overs by Doctors and Nurses than most his age so why add to it if its not needed.

Thanks again for your advice everyone, I might amble along to the clinic at some point but I'll not be rushing there next month unless there is a problem.

EDIT - Just to add that he's had all the jabs he should have and will have the jabs he's scheduled for, we're not denying him medical attention. In fact he's had his BCG this afternoon and is having a nap to recover. Thanks.

stiltwalker

I fell out with our local HV service when the advice I was given on how to make up bottles (completely usaked for as I was perfectly capable!) was actually wrong! I am a chef and therefore know all about food poisoning, safe temps etc and the temps this p*llock was telling us to make the bottle up at were actually within the worst range of temps for bacteria multiplication! When I calmly pointed this out to her and said that I would not be allowed to serve food prepared at these temperatures from my tearoom she said that it was ok as it was my home not a professional kitchen! - Does not make it safe to serve though was my response and she brushed it off. The thing that worries me though is how many worried and unsure first time mothers who don't have this type of knowledge get taken in by this false and dangerous "help"?!!! I'm now pregnant with no 2 and he will not be trailed into the local town to be weighed willy nilly and if any HV tries to persuade me that this is necessay then they will get it with both barrels.