Do we HAVE to take our baby to be weighed at the HV?

thatgirlsam

jaibaby wrote: »

My mother brought me and my siblings up perfectly. Nothing wrong with us. So why the hell shouldn't I go to her for advice??

If I spent 2 years reading up on the mechanics of a car, say 10 years ago. Does that mean that I would still be able to sort out a car that was made this year? No, because things change. And don't say that doesn't make sense because it's not a child. You read a baby book from 10 years ago. Totally different to things now.

The problem is, if someone unfortunately loses a baby / child, everything they did is looked into. If they were weaned early, that is then condemmed. If they slept on their stomach instead of their back, that is condemmed. The MMR thing that was going around - found that children who had autism had their MMR jabs - most silliest thing I've ever heard! Just because so many kids they studied that had autism, and had their MMR, they suggested it was linked, so not to give your child it. And now this year they have proved that to be cr*p. But I bet there's a few of you that panicked and didn't let your child have it done, did you? I turned to my mum on that occasion, and she told me that me and my siblings all had it, and we were all ok. So all three of mine had it done.

If I were that concerned over my children I would make an appointment to see a pediatrician. I am sorry though, as I don't understand how seeing a normally doctor would not be ok? I mean, I went to see him when I was younger. He sees sick people everyday. What is there that he can't tell me. Oh yeah, that my child isn't gaining enough weight

for a start it is not safe to give a baby solids until they can hold their head up independantly.. your mum is quite lucky your brother didn't choke!

and thats before you consider what introducing solids does to a babies stomach

i doubt very much you will find many people who think its safe to start weaning at 3 weeks old

your brother may have not suffered any detriment to his health but that is more by luck than judgement

but if your mum made an INFORMED choice then who am i to argue

galvanizersbaby

jaibaby wrote: »

My mother brought me and my siblings up perfectly. Nothing wrong with us. So why the hell shouldn't I go to her for advice??

If I spent 2 years reading up on the mechanics of a car, say 10 years ago. Does that mean that I would still be able to sort out a car that was made this year? No, because things change. And don't say that doesn't make sense because it's not a child. You read a baby book from 10 years ago. Totally different to things now.

The problem is, if someone unfortunately loses a baby / child, everything they did is looked into. If they were weaned early, that is then condemmed. If they slept on their stomach instead of their back, that is condemmed. The MMR thing that was going around - found that children who had autism had their MMR jabs - most silliest thing I've ever heard! Just because so many kids they studied that had autism, and had their MMR, they suggested it was linked, so not to give your child it. And now this year they have proved that to be cr*p. But I bet there's a few of you that panicked and didn't let your child have it done, did you? I turned to my mum on that occasion, and she told me that me and my siblings all had it, and we were all ok. So all three of mine had it done.

If I were that concerned over my children I would make an appointment to see a pediatrician. I am sorry though, as I don't understand how seeing a normally doctor would not be ok? I mean, I went to see him when I was younger. He sees sick people everyday. What is there that he can't tell me. Oh yeah, that my child isn't gaining enough weight

Haven't you answered your own question here to an extent?
I have often followed my own mothers advice with my own children but with all the things we know now that weren't known about then I would not do something that may put my child at risk just because my mother did it 38 years ago and the outcome was ok.

nottslass_2

jaibaby wrote: »

My mother brought me and my siblings up perfectly. Nothing wrong with us. So why the hell shouldn't I go to her for advice??

If I spent 2 years reading up on the mechanics of a car, say 10 years ago. Does that mean that I would still be able to sort out a car that was made this year? No, because things change. And don't say that doesn't make sense because it's not a child. You read a baby book from 10 years ago. Totally different to things now.

The problem is, if someone unfortunately loses a baby / child, everything they did is looked into. If they were weaned early, that is then condemmed. If they slept on their stomach instead of their back, that is condemmed. The MMR thing that was going around - found that children who had autism had their MMR jabs - most silliest thing I've ever heard! Just because so many kids they studied that had autism, and had their MMR, they suggested it was linked, so not to give your child it. And now this year they have proved that to be cr*p. But I bet there's a few of you that panicked and didn't let your child have it done, did you? I turned to my mum on that occasion, and she told me that me and my siblings all had it, and we were all ok. So all three of mine had it done.

If I were that concerned over my children I would make an appointment to see a pediatrician. I am sorry though, as I don't understand how seeing a normally doctor would not be ok? I mean, I went to see him when I was younger. He sees sick people everyday. What is there that he can't tell me. Oh yeah, that my child isn't gaining enough weight

Whilst previous child rearing experience is extremely valuable you still need to be aware and consider the latest research and guidelines and any (good) HV should be able to give you up to date advice. Just because something was done a certain way years ago and "we were alright" does not necessarily mean that it the correct way to do things now and anyone dismissing a health care professionals advice simply because they "haven't had any kids" is just ignorant.



I'm sure your mother used to put you to sleep on your front,wrapped you up warmly and may even have smoked in the same room (as did generations) but research and issuing guidelines changed 20 odd years ago and the cases instances of cot death have fallen dramatically which goes to prove the "old way" is not necessarily the best way.

Nicki

Wow, you are very hostile jaibaby.

Presumably your baby did get his 6 week check from the Gp along with every other baby in the country, where his or her hips should have been checked as a matter of course? So to be fair it wasn't just the HV who missed it for 11 months. It would appear the GP missed it, you missed it, and even your super experienced mum missed it too. So it seems a bit extreme to discount all the advice given by every HV in the country on the basis that yours didn't pick up a problem that many others missed too.

As I posted, my experience with the HV this time round was less than ideal, because she was frankly lazy and nor interested in my DS's health. But I still think HV in general do have an important role to play, and that it is important that all parents should be told the latest advice and guidelines. It is up to them of course whether they follow it, but rather an irritated parent being told how to make up a bottle when they know how to do so safely, than a seriously ill baby in hospital with food poisoning because the parent didn't know, and perhaps had been told by an elderly parent that there was no need to sterilize for a newborn as they hadn't done so 30 years previously and their child had been ok, for example.

jaibaby

Nicki wrote: »

even your super experienced mum missed it too

OMG... I can't stop laughing!!! My "super" experienced mum had no experience with CHD (the medical term BTW). My DD 6-week check, which was done at 10 weeks thanks to the HV, was done by the HV not a doctor.

And luck??? Well, at least you are making me laugh!

You know, I have more important things to do than sit here and be involved in such a petty bloody argument with you. You obviously think a HV is a godsend. Telling us that our children are not putting enough weight on / growing enough / having enough wet-dirty nappies etc etc all because of what they have learnt FROM A BOOK!

And that's all it comes down to. A so-called education from a book! I'm doing a maths degree at the moment, and by just reading a book, do you think I would be better at being, say, a maths teacher, than someone who actually worked through problems and experienced it??? Basically, a HV that reads a book or one that has had the experience of bringing up a child in this day and age.

And last point. My mum is not 38 years older than me. She has experienced children throughout almost 3 decades. She had my cousins (who are now 30 & 28) whilst her sister went back to work. I'm 27, my siblings are 23,21,19,16. My children are 10, 7 and 2. My sister also has children of 2 and 6 months. So you can't honestly say that so much has changed without her knowing. But, in reality, you can, and most probably will, because all you want is people to think you are right. Well congratulations hunnie! I've let you win this one, because I can't be a***ed!!!

flower_72

Such anger and frustration in the post above! Wow!!

I'm pregnant with my first. I've had a visit from the HV already as she likes meeting the mothers before the child is born.
I wondered what it was all about frst but it was actually really nice to have a chat with her. She explained her role, basically being there for advice if needed, to tell me what the latest national guidelines are, discuss any concerns, etc.

Now what I will do with the info/ advice is totally up to me. Just as what I do with the info given by the midwife or a GP or any professional who's advice I seek.

nottslass_2

jaibaby wrote: »

OMG... I can't stop laughing!!! My "super" experienced mum had no experience with CHD (the medical term BTW). My DD 6-week check, which was done at 10 weeks thanks to the HV, was done by the HV not a doctor.

And luck??? Well, at least you are making me laugh!

You know, I have more important things to do than sit here and be involved in such a petty bloody argument with you. You obviously think a HV is a godsend. Telling us that our children are not putting enough weight on / growing enough / having enough wet-dirty nappies etc etc all because of what they have learnt FROM A BOOK!

And that's all it comes down to. A so-called education from a book! I'm doing a maths degree at the moment, and by just reading a book, do you think I would be better at being, say, a maths teacher, than someone who actually worked through problems and experienced it??? Basically, a HV that reads a book or one that has had the experience of bringing up a child in this day and age.

And last point. My mum is not 38 years older than me. She has experienced children throughout almost 3 decades. She had my cousins (who are now 30 & 28) whilst her sister went back to work. I'm 27, my siblings are 23,21,19,16. My children are 10, 7 and 2. My sister also has children of 2 and 6 months. So you can't honestly say that so much has changed without her knowing. But, in reality, you can, and most probably will, because all you want is people to think you are right. Well congratulations hunnie! I've let you win this one, because I can't be a***ed!!!

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

I've also experienced children over nearly 3 decades,and I can assure you that I'm still not following the out of date guidelines that were presented to me when I had DS1 24 years ago !!!

squirrelchops

delain wrote: »

I had a Horizon parenting asessment once (long story!) and my worker was my age and had no children. She was brilliant and I like to think that she learnt something from us, because 'textbook' things never worked because of the twins' difficulties. She might not have had any kids, but she was happy enough to 'adapt' the skills she learnt to help particular families.
QUOTE]

I think that shows a good professional as she was willing to learn with you and from you and not just impart her knowledge.

I am a social worker and was only just talking to one of my families yesterday about how they have helped me learn in relation to something specific that happened.

I don't have children yet and some parents can use that as a criticism. However, I have extensive pre-social work experience of working with children and therefore feel that although I haven't physically carried and borne a child I have done as much as a parent would have.

barbiedoll

I work in midwifery and I have probably learned more from my mums than I ever did from my tutors or my colleagues. Everyone has different experiences, a good healthcare/social worker will use what she learns from each case and will pass that knowledge on.

As an example, I had a very easy labour and birth and no problems breastfeeding. I always thought that women who didn't breastfeed were either making a fuss about nothing or else couldn't be bothered or had hang-ups about it. (And unfortunately, quite a few BF counsellors seem to have the same opinion :mad:)
It's only now, that I have seen the real physical and emotional problems that women and babies suffer, do I realise that there are many reasons why some women can't/won't breastfeed and it certainly isn't my job to judge anyone. It's my job to help women do what THEY think is best for them and their child, I can give advice and guidance, and I can help them if they wish. I can tell them that certain practices are dangerous and if I think that anyone isn't capable of caring for their child or themselves, then I have a duty to report that to the relevant agencies. There will always be good and bad HV's, midwives, doctors and nurses, just as there will always be excellent ones.

One thing I do always tell all of my mums though and that is to trust their instincts. If anyone thinks that their child is unwell, or that anything is wrong at all, they should shout until someone listens. Just because someone has a medical degree doesn't mean that they know your child better than you do!

shellsuit

squirrelchops wrote: »

I think that shows a good professional as she was willing to learn with you and from you and not just impart her knowledge.

I am a social worker and was only just talking to one of my families yesterday about how they have helped me learn in relation to something specific that happened.

I don't have children yet and some parents can use that as a criticism. However, I have extensive pre-social work experience of working with children and therefore feel that although I haven't physically carried and borne a child I have done as much as a parent would have.

You might have worked with many children in different circumstances, but that's nothing compared to living with a child and raising him/her, so I disagree with you when you say you have done as much as a parent would have apart from actually being pregnant and giving birth.