Hi, Please can anyone help? SOA and current situation

clairehi

Hi again,

I hope the GP visit went ok and they can get your OH some help immediately to start to get him back on an even keel. that has to be the first priority.

you sound amazingly together considering the situation, I am sure I would be in bits, well done you.

thinking longer term about the business, re your post above "I feel torn, like on the one hand, am I just being delusional, overly optimistic and should accept we are failures, or should I maintain that given time it will work?" rather than just going on a gut feel, can you use your business plan to do some scenario planning with different forecasts of income from the business and subletting the premises etc.

I wouldnt presume to give you business advice myself, but if the business enterprise adviser you spoke to before couldnt think of anything you hadnt already done, then I think you should look for other sources of advice.

rhubarbarella

OK, just to update people, took the OH to the GP today, she was great, really listened. She has prescribed him some anti-depressents, a weeks worth of sleeping tablets to help him get back into a sleep routine, and some betablockers for anxiety. She has also said that at any time we can phone up if needed and get him into the duty doctor, also gave us the out of hours number, and the details of a mental health emergency intervention team for out of hours, just in case things get really bad.
I feel reassured now that they are aware of the situation, and that there is support for us both there.
So thats good.
Also spoke to business debt line, but they couldn't really tell me anything new unfortunately.
Landlord phoned back today and has agreed to delay the rent payments, he wants to meet us at least once a month to see how its going, but basically we won't pay any rent for 2 or 3 months, and then (asuming business pics up) will make up the arrears over the next couple of years, in order to relieve the burden.
It is so nice to know there are people who care, and that they are willing to help.
Next is to get the bank to let us go interest only or full payment holiday for a little while.
Also going to write up an "official" budget, to show to the non-essential nonsecured creditors, to make token payments on the personal loan and credit card, so that this will reduce costs. So all in all, if we can, for 3 months say, reduce the rent to zero (to be paid back later), reduce mortgage to interest only, and just make a token £1 payment on loan and credit card this will reduce outgoings by £1693/month.
If we cannot claim income support then we should be able to claim for working tax credits.
I am also going to find out if I can do maybe 1 day a week of permitted work. Not sure how my heath would hold up doing this long term, but short term, if I could find an 8 hour a week min wage job, that would bring in an extra £187/month, and if I can still receieve my benefit money, this will also help. Still not sure if it is enough, and I don't think I would be able to hold downa job for too long, but short term it may be enough to try and get us through the worst - if we can just keep payng the mortgage, and essentials like food, heat, lights, water etc then we can reassess after.
Apparently if we are entitled to income support then we can also get help with the mortgage and council tax benefit. If working tax credits it would be about £200/month I am told. I was told we should be eligible for one or the other. So if all that were to work out it would basically free up about £2000/month, so that we can concentrate on trying to make the business work.
If, after all that, it is still not working then we know we have tried everything, and can look at other options such as bankrupt.

I do feel a bit more positive, in that I have a plan (Gah, now I have blackadder in my head). Also, knowing that the GP is on-side, she didn't judge or anything, just listened and offered help. She has asked OH to go back weekly for the foreseeable future so they can monitor him.

I am slightly perturbed by the list of side effects in the antidepressent leaflet. Does anyone have any experience of these tablets? They are called SSRI. Also the sleeping tablets.

Anyway, thats an update. Regardless of the money situation I am just glad they are taking his mental health seriously.
GP also wants to see me alone later this week to make sure I am OK (which I am not, really, but nowehere near as bad as he is)

So, thats today.
Going to go through all the accounts again later and see where we are at.

Please everyone keep their fingers crossed that we can get through this.
Thanks again

RAS

Well done lady.

Just one thing.

Can you check that gas payment? I know BG wanta lot of money, but there are some simple things

1. Can maybe photograph the meter and a bill - minus personal details and go over to the energy forum and see if you are on the wrong sort of tariff?

Check when the heating and water come on?

Do you have a water cylinder? What tempurature is that set to? it need to be 60 degrees, no higher.

Double check the reading against the bill and that this is not an estimate?

or were you on a very low estimate for a while and they have hiked itn up?

rhubarbarella

RAS wrote: »

Well done lady.

Just one thing.

Can you check that gas payment? I know BG wanta lot of money, but there are some simple things

1. Can maybe photograph the meter and a bill - minus personal details and go over to the energy forum and see if you are on the wrong sort of tariff?

Check when the heating and water come on?

Do you have a water cylinder? What tempurature is that set to? it need to be 60 degrees, no higher.

Double check the reading against the bill and that this is not an estimate?

or were you on a very low estimate for a while and they have hiked itn up?

Oh, that was something, it was recommended to me I phone consumer direct, as the gas meter is apparently the property of the energy company or something, so its their responsibility to pay for the check, or might be, or something.

Your idea is good too though, ill try and do that later, thanks for the idea

Superbiatch

rhubarbarella wrote: »

I am slightly perturbed by the list of side effects in the antidepressent leaflet. Does anyone have any experience of these tablets? They are called SSRI. Also the sleeping tablets.

Are they citalopram? If so thats what my bf takes. If i remember correctly he did have some sleep problems in the early days which is probably why your GP gave him some sleeping tablets too. They do say it can take a few weeks to work but we did see quite a noticeable improvement in him within a week (he'd been suffering with clinical depression for many years and thought he was going mad).

Glad your GP was so understanding, she sounds like a good one giving you out of hours numbers and information on mental health teams

rhubarbarella

Superbiatch wrote: »

Are they citalopram? If so thats what my bf takes. If i remember correctly he did have some sleep problems in the early days which is probably why your GP gave him some sleeping tablets too. They do say it can take a few weeks to work but we did see quite a noticeable improvement in him within a week (he'd been suffering with clinical depression for many years and thought he was going mad).

Glad your GP was so understanding, she sounds like a good one giving you out of hours numbers and information on mental health teams

Yes! those are the ones. My god, the side effects looked horrendous. Although that doesn't necessarily mean he will get them, but still... I am just a bit worried about him starting on so many new tablets at once. On the other hand, he needs something. i think I am just suspicious of anything potentailly mind altering...even if it is for the better! I am hoping they do help him though, it is heartbreaking to see him like this.
And yes, the GP is lovely, its just a shame the receptionists are "little hitlers" as my granddad would say!

maganan

Oh rhubarbarella you are so inspiring, the way you've coped with everything thats happened is amazing. You just seem to have taken the bull by the horns and got stuck in, talk about when the going gets tough.............! Very glad you're getting some help for your OH but make sure you keep your own appt and get the help you need too

Good luck and take care x

dancingwedger

Nothing to add here, other than a bit of moral support.

Truely inspiring the way you've bashed on in a very hard situation.

I really do wish you and your OH all the success in the world.

Keep at it, x

dancingfairy

sending positive vibes for you.
df

pennies_from_Heaven

Bless you and good luck, you have done a fantastic job of taking control of a difficult situation - you should be proud of yourself xx