Why do people do this ?

gill_81uk

I've also gone to read your thread and don't see what the problem is! The only smart comment was a joke which the poster then apologies for. Other than that everyone was very helpful and polite.

belfastgirl23

I think maybe you need to recognise that the disability issue is one that you are very sensitive about. Which is fair enough, we all have hot buttons that set us off. The trouble is that when you post on a forum, other people do not know that this is a hot topic for you and they respond in whatever way they choose. I've seen my share of nasty posts. And sometimes I've been tough myself as a way of trying to perhaps shake someone up or help them realise they need to take action. I think if you post to ask a question, you need to accept that people will offer responses you will not like and it's up to you to figure out which advice you'll take.

I think you need to take responsiblity for the fact that you didn't say at the outset (or fairly soon afterwards) that moving them was not an option. No one was setting out to upset you so perhaps you need to look back at yourself and ask yourself why you took what was generally well meant advice so badly. Are there other things upsetting you at the minute?

I am sorry you felt so bad about it though!

Pollycat

I've just had another look at the 'wardrobe' thread and what IHD actually said was:

I just cant get them up the stairs its too tight an angle

Nothing at all about being physically incapable of getting them up the stairs or having nobody to help take them apart as he/she points out in a later post.

I actually get quite cross when somebody posts asking for advice but doesn't give the whole story so people spend ages asking questions or offering advice that isn't appropriate as more information is gradually released.

tiamai_d

In fairness, you didn't say you were disabled in your original post. You just said the angle of teh stairs was too tight. So most of the posts were valid. You could dismantle them to get them up.

Then you said you were disabled and called everyone sarcastic. Had you simply put down that you were disabled and so dismantling them was not an option, people would have then understood. But you didn't.

So really, you are just as bad as the ones who make sarcastic and stupid comments.

puddy

i dont know why one of the posters apologised for the chocolate comment. the original post stated 'my sofa is chocolate', therefore the comment was a light hearted attempt to highlight this, i didnt think it was rude, or sarcastic or nasty in any way.

the best advice is to get them apart and take them upstairs. if you cant do this then get someone in who can, thats what anyone would have to do, disabled or not. my partner and i had to get someone out to take our front room window out to put a sofa through it, all because i didnt measure the access properly, people on the DIY thread were very helpful, just as they were to you

gingin_2

belfastgirl23 wrote: »

No one was setting out to upset you so perhaps you need to look back at yourself and ask yourself why you took what was generally well meant advice so badly. Are there other things upsetting you at the minute?

I am sorry you felt so bad about it though!

I think this is good advice and I hope you do come back and post, IHD.I don't think anyone is out to point score, nor hold grudges on either threads.

If it makes you feel better, I remember being so upset by comments from one poster on a board on here that I did have a good cry and have never dared go back there again! Someone with a stronger backbone than me might have been able to shrug it off but I never did. They caught me at a bad time and on a subject I was particularly emotional about but I feel cross with myself for getting upset with someone in cyberspace.

IHD

Ok this has got way out of hand , i have clearly upset a fair few of you , so i would like to apologise. In my defence i would also like to say that in the original thread i put the following ;....What can i do to make them fit into the living room more ,in the way of decoration? My sofas are chocolate but apart from that i havent started to plan the room yet. Any suggestions ? I have put trailing plants on top to grow down the sides but apart from that im stumped !. I didnt ask for advice on how to move them or dismantle them , so didnt realise it was relevant to give you my whole life story regarding my disability as i wasnt asking how to get them upstairs . I didnt also realise that i would have to add the word COLOUR after chocolate sofa. So please accept my apology and someone close this thread.