Nursery.................

demir2424

I had a similar problem with my 3 year old son who would tell tales about a member of staff at the nursery (he said she hit him) and the staff would need to hold him down every morning so that I could sneek out.

The crying would stop as soon as I was out the door and it was that he had hit another little girl at nursery not that a staff member had hit him. He needed about 4 months to settle in and now the crying isn't as bad.

He would still do anything to get out of nursery - last week he coughed until he was sick just to go home.

Discuss your situation with the nursery staff - I spoke to 4 members of staff on different days just to make sure I was geting the whole story.

milliebear00001

Two issues really.

I'm a teacher, so might be able to give you another 'take' on both aspects.

Firstly, it's normal for kids to scream blue murder when their parents leave them at nursery - very common and nothing to worry about so long as it all stops within a few mins of you leaving. Far better she behaves that way now, than when she starts school at 4-5!

Is it the 'best' thing to do. I think that depends. I sent my own children three days a week from age three until school, and I think it does give kids a good introduction to the idea of following rules, sitting quietly when told, concentrating on something, listening well etc etc. I don;t think they need to go from three to achieve that. Perhaps you might want to consider sending her at four for a term or two before school? As long as she's getting loads of playing and reading and making with you (and perhaps at other 'groups') then she's unlikely to suffer from an educational point of view.

nottslass_2

pelirocco wrote: »

No I dont think it does , if shes not happy and you dont need to send her because of work , what could be better then her being at home with you ?

I think we pack them off to school far too early

I agree,why put such a young child through this unnecessarily ?

Children have survived for generations without nursery

I have 3 DS's the oldest is now 24 and at that time there was no pre school nursery and he didn't start school until just before his 5Th birthday yet he managed perfectly well learning to interact and make friends with his peers,had no problems following rules etc and I can assure you he was not disadvantaged academically by this .

In contrast my now 8 yr old started nursery at just 3 (he was a young 3) and although I personally didn't think he was ready, I sent him in case it would disadvantage him in someway. Although we had no tears he didn't really settle for another year and with hind sight I wish I had of followed my instinct and waited.


Every child is different and you have to do whats best for yours

meritaten

I am a bit torn in two about nursery. I think that age three some kids are ready to go - others are not! bit concerned that its only one member of staff that is causing the prob with your child though. can you not sneak back and see how she is a few minutes after leaving her? or turn up to collect her an hour early? claim a forgotten appointment if necessary? you do need to put your mind at rest hun and the fact that she seems ok when you pick her up points to her perhaps having a bit of separation anxiety and is using this member of staff as an excuse?

nottslass_2

demir2424 wrote: »

I had a similar problem with my 3 year old son who would tell tales about a member of staff at the nursery (he said she hit him) and the staff would need to hold him down every morning so that I could sneek out.

The crying would stop as soon as I was out the door and it was that he had hit another little girl at nursery not that a staff member had hit him. He needed about 4 months to settle in and now the crying isn't as bad.

He would still do anything to get out of nursery - last week he coughed until he was sick just to go home.
Discuss your situation with the nursery staff - I spoke to 4 members of staff on different days just to make sure I was geting the whole story.

Your DS sounds deeply unhappy and distressed - coughing until he's sick is not normal behaviour.

Children obviously need time to settle in,but I'd be questioning if this is the right environment (or the best thing) for your DS especially as he's still crying 4 months later.Have the staff come up with any suggestions as to how to make things less distressing for him (and you)?

Money_maker

nottslass wrote: »

Your DS sounds deeply unhappy and distressed - coughing until he's sick is not normal behaviour.

Children obviously need time to settle in,but I'd be questioning if this is the right environment (or the best thing) for your DS especially as he's still crying 4 months later.Have the staff come up with any suggestions as to how to make things less distressing for him (and you)?

I have to agree. Children of this age get things mixed up but are unlikely to deliberately lie.

If he's that desperately unhappy then I would start to look around for another nursery or preschool. Have you had a serious chat with the supervisor about why she thinks he is unhappy?

If my DD was that unhappy, I wouldn't think twice about moving her or perhaps keeping her at home for a few more months.

jm2926

Dunno, my mum says I screamed the place down when she dropped me off, but when she looked in the window two minutes later I was fine (as the staff had assured her).

I have no memory of it. Apparently it went on for months.