Housekeeping money

Fang_3

Do you not receive any money from the father of your child? Does he expect your husband to financially support his child too?

Gavin83

moomoomama27 wrote: »

All this seperate money, and his/hers spends, seems very alien to me, and not the ideal makings of a partnership! I would be seriously embarrassed and even offended to have to ask my husband for money!

I can see your point in regards to joint finances but how does the spending work? If you want to spend a reasonable sum of money from the joint account on yourself should you ask our partners permission, or should literally everything be spent on joint things only?

I would only consider joint finances necessary should children be involved otherwise I fail to see the point.

Plans_all_plans

Hi Gavin, my husband and I don't so much 'ask permission' of each other, but we discuss the proposed purchase and come to a joint decision. If the cost of the potential purchase is less than say £50 then we wouldn't bother discussing it necessarily, but it would depend on our financial state at the time.

We have the same attitude to money and spending though so the above isn't even a hard and fast rule that we've come up with, it just happens naturally with us. It's about trust and respect in my opinion: we trust each other not to go mad with money and respect each other enough to discuss larger personal purchases.

gregg1

Gavin83 wrote: »

I can see your point in regards to joint finances but how does the spending work? If you want to spend a reasonable sum of money from the joint account on yourself should you ask our partners permission, or should literally everything be spent on joint things only?

I would only consider joint finances necessary should children be involved otherwise I fail to see the point.

because when you marry someone you make a commitment to that person. What is mine is my wife's and vice versa - everything we own is ours, not mine, not hers. She does not have to ask my permission to spend our money! Obviously if one of us wants to spend a large amount of money on something we discuss it with each other beforehand but that is surely the same for most people.

Gavin83

Fair play, that seems a reasonable solution. I was thinking should one partner have some expensive hobby then how would that play out. I guess it depends on your overall joint income anyway.

skintchick

The way we do it is that OH pays all the bills and that include the joint credit card whic I use for petrol, food and expenses related to our DD.

He also pays me I think it is £200 a month which is to cover the classes I take her to, cups of coffe, and anything I want to spend on myself. I actually used to find I ran out as when she was little I'd go and sit in cafes with her a lot, but now I am better and tend to have a bit left over at the end of th emonth although I haven;t had my hair done for ages.

I would like a bit more money but we are brassic at the moment so there isn;t any more.

Penny_Watcher

Just remember that you work together as equals in a team - if you didn't do what you do (keeping the home fires burning, childcare etc etc etc) he couldn't do what he does (have the time and freedom to go out to earn the family money). Teamwork - simples .

It took a few goes to get this concept into my husband's head, but life has been much easier all round since.

themull1

We have seperate current accounts, i pay all household bills/mortgage except sky, husband pays all food/car/sky. child benefit goes into joint savings account. We don't go and buy stuff without mentioning it first, and we never argue about money.!! although we argue about other things!! Ha ha.