Am I Making A Fuss About Nothing? Opinions Please.

caz2703

mrs-stressed wrote: »

How humbling!! We are brought down to earth very quickly arent we when someone we have initially stereotyped on a first sight - then they go and do something polite and courteous amd mannerley!
I bet you thanked him profusely - that will have made him feel good in return - and then he will do nice things for others more often as the thanks is such an ego booster.

As for spitting - well, he could have saved that up for inside the A&E department - at the very least he did it outside!!! Why I wonder did he feel the need to spit in the first place. It is the most disgusting thing ever ever ever.....

Once I got over the shock, yes I did thank him profusely for opening both doors! And yes, I was very humbled

Actually here's a sidetracked question: if you're behind someone walking through a building for example where they hold open more than one door, do you thank the person for holding each door or just the first couple? I always thank for each door but I've noticed some people only thank me once then take the rest for granted.

mrs-stressed

caz2703 wrote: »

Once I got over the shock, yes I did thank him profusely for opening both doors! And yes, I was very humbled

Actually here's a sidetracked question: if you're behind someone walking through a building for example where they hold open more than one door, do you thank the person for holding each door or just the first couple? I always thank for each door but I've noticed some people only thank me once then take the rest for granted.

I would like to think that I do thank each time - but its not the generic thank you, its more of a mumbled thanks by the third door. If the 'leader' lets the door shut on me he/she gets the look and the ice cool vibe and if I am in a real strop I will say thank you in a cool, crisp tone of voice on purpose to let him/her know I am well peed off. Again its back to manners isnt it.....It tends to be some younger people who dont have a developed sense of courteousness and manners and as for older people - they should know better!!
I am now old enough to not be afraid of saying what I think unless you are 6.6 tall, built like a sherman tank, have a waist long beard, two little horns (not Schrek) and a whippy tail - then I run like hell!!!
Not of course into a door that hasnt been opened for me you understand...LOL

Malory

mrs-stressed wrote: »

I . I dont mind doing it for an elederley person but for a young, fit 25 year old lad - well thats taking the michael somewhat.....

Why should an elderly person be allowed to be inconsiderate but a 25-year-old be criticised for it?

Whatever age you are, if you don't treat other people with respect you shouldn't expect others to treat you with respect.

Turning 70 (or whatever age you consider elderly) doesn't suddenly give you the right to be rude to other people.

If elderly people can get away not saying "please", "thank you", etc., they can't really expect younger people to be courteous to them.

If you are older, you are supposed to be setting an example, not saying "Do as I say, not as I do."

I'm in my 40s, so speaking with a middle-aged perspective.

Also, it is common courtesy to hold a door for anyone who is behind you - regardless of age, gender, etc.

I'm a petite woman; I still hold doors open for men who are bigger and stronger than me.

caz2703

Malory wrote: »

I'm a petite woman; I still hold doors open for men who are bigger and stronger than me.

And how often would you say that they thank you? I'm thinking back to my days of being on the Underground whilst pregnant and with a 4 year old and not one bloke would offer their seat. Granted, I could have looked fat for all they knew but common courtesy seems to have gone these days although I still hold out hope that my good manners will be reciprocated some day.

mrs-stressed

Malory wrote: »

Why should an elderly person be allowed to be inconsiderate but a 25-year-old be criticised for it?

Noone should be 'allowed' to be inconsiderate or even rude to answer your statement. I tend to make more allowances if I see someone struggling with the heavy doors if they have a walking stick and shopping weighing them down. I would do the same if it was a 25 yr old with a crutch and shopping. What I think is the height of (well, one of them anyway) ignorance is the young 25yr old, fit and able young man who glides through without a byyourleave. And then doesnt say thanks!!!!

Elderly people can be rude, bombastic, curmudgeonly (sp?) and downright bloudy but I use the word CAN advisably.!!

mrs-stressed

caz2703 wrote: »

And how often would you say that they thank you? I'm thinking back to my days of being on the Underground whilst pregnant and with a 4 year old and not one bloke would offer their seat. Granted, I could have looked fat for all they knew but common courtesy seems to have gone these days although I still hold out hope that my good manners will be reciprocated some day.

One day someone will really surprise you and you will be blown away by the fact that all your expectations of good manners and decency will be proved in one small insignificant little gesture. Savour when it happens - its all about good upbringing - whether you are rich or poor, old or young.

I was in a train recently and a young lad was sitting in the only seat that wasnt occupied by adults. He was sullen, churlish and i-have-an-attitude-dont-test-me look. A small frail old lady got on and was standing up hanging on for dear life. I asked in a very kindly and polite manner would he mind if he gave his seat up for her. His face was a picture - it obviously hadnt occurred to him to get up and let her sit down - which he did and not even ungraciously. He obviously didnt know that was what young people did for either the older and pregnant people on the train. I all went well I have to say and the lady could sit down. It wasnt his fault really - he just hadnt been educated in the ways of manners and courteousness.

caz2703

Some day eh!!

When myself and DH were on holiday in Orlando we were on the iRide (trolley style bus that runs up and down International Drive) when a woman in her 30s got on with 2 kids. Hubby and I were both sat down so we got up to let her and her kids sit down. She was totally shocked and initially wouldn't accept our offer but when we persuaded her it was no problem she sat down and squished up so much so with her kids on her knees so that I could sit back down. There were so many other times when hubby would let me have a seat and he would stand only to watch younger, fitter men take up seats (as well as kids sprawling across them) while older or less able people were made to stand.

Personally I don't hold out any hope for being given a seat on public transport as I fear in this day and age people would be more scared to get pregnant & fat mixed up than sit there oblivious and pretend they can't see you.