4 year old with toilet issues - help

flower24

I apologise in advance for the nature of this post! My 4 year old daughter will not go to the toilet for a number 2

It all started a few months ago when she was constipated, and it hurt for her to go, so now she is scared of going and holds it in

She is still in nappies at night, have tried stopping them but was having to lift her 3 times in the night for her to stay dry so felt it was a pointless exercise. But now she is waiting until she goes to bed and then waking up doing a poo in her nappy, which obviously upsets her.

I haven't taken her to the doctor as I don't understand what they would do, am worried if they gave her some kind of laxative she would just have really runny accidents

Does anybody have any suggestions? Thanks

hitchins

Both my neice and cousin's little girl had this problem, again after suffering constipation . They were both given Movicol, it did produce slight leaks, but it did the job. Also my cousin really made a big thing about it if the little girl went on the toilet/potty, even going as far to taking a photo to show daddy!

Good luck.

flower24

Thanks, I will be ringing the doctors first thing then, hopefully we can get it sorted before she goes back to nursery in the new year. I have been really praising her if she goes on the loo but I literally have to hold her on there while she screams because she is so scared x

hitchins

immynjoesmum wrote: »

Thanks, I will be ringing the doctors first thing then, hopefully we can get it sorted before she goes back to nursery in the new year. I have been really praising her if she goes on the loo but I literally have to hold her on there while she screams because she is so scared x

Awwww it's catch 22 isn't it? More they hold it, harder it is and more painful. I know it's no consolation, but it is quite common.

babyshoes

You could try natural laxitives like orange juice/fresh oranges, prunes or other dried fruit, and foods with plenty of fibre in them like oats porridge. Make sure she drinks plenty of liquids if you are increasing fibre intake! A quick internet search should bring up plenty of suggestions for foods that might help.

I suffered from constipation quite often as a small child and remember my Mom sitting with me doing breathing exercises to help. I think it not only helped with the pushing, but also gave something to focus on rather than the fear of pain.

elf06

Hi I am new to this part of the forum (stepping outside the comfort zone of my GC and NSD challenge) so I hope you dont mind me offering my thoughts (which may be slightly controversial).

I will start by saying that my little boy has never had this problem so my advice may not be the best BUT my friends little girl did. When I was potty training DS (now 4) we were getting on great with number 1's but whenever he needed a number 2 he did it in his pants or on the floor thank goodness for wooden floors . With him there was no apparent reason why but I, in the end, offered a bribe. He was allowed to pick something out of Arg0s (within reason) and when he managed to do his number 2 in the potty/toilet he was allowed his gift as a reward. Now the issue I can see with this not working with your situation is that she is in pain when going to the toilet................however the longer she waits the more painful it gets I really hope it gets sorted soon, its not a nice position to be in for either of you

pandora205

You little girl has learned to associate 'going' with pain, which is understandable. I think the best approach is to encourage a higher fibre diet - lots of fruit, veg and nuts, whole grains bread and cereals to loosen her stools. You'll need to monitor it a bit to get the right diet. Before she needs to go, reassure her that it won't hurt as her poos will be much softer. She will gradually relearn that its okay to go. Maybe a reward (sticker) for going may be helpful too.

building_with_lego

babyshoes wrote: »

You could try natural laxitives like orange juice/fresh oranges, prunes or other dried fruit, and foods with plenty of fibre in them like oats porridge. Make sure she drinks plenty of liquids if you are increasing fibre intake! A quick internet search should bring up plenty of suggestions for foods that might help.

I suffered from constipation quite often as a small child and remember my Mom sitting with me doing breathing exercises to help. I think it not only helped with the pushing, but also gave something to focus on rather than the fear of pain.

I'm sure I've heard of doctors 'prescribing' blowing up balloons and bubbles to give them while they're on the loo- the blowing action helps to relax the vital muscles!

My DD has recently suffered from constipation and was prescribed Lactulose (which you can buy over the counter); it's a softener rather than a laxative, did not produce any leaks and made her more regular.

shazrobo

my ds gets constipated a lot, and the doctor prescribed him lactulose as a softener too. it is a very common problem

scotty1971

my ds went through this,had him at doctors,got lactulose granted it made it soft,but he still didn't want to go,so took him to the health visitor,and she gave me the best advice,just leave him be he will go when he is ready,which he did,don't make a fuss over it or try and bribe them,he just went and done a number 2 in the toilet,and that was only six months before he was due to start school.its not worth them being constipated and in pain,she will go when she's ready

Indie_Kid

immynjoesmum wrote: »

I am worried if they gave her some kind of laxative she would just have really runny accidents

Laxatives make the poo soft - not runny; but they make it easier to go toilet.