Trying to get a loan after bankruptcy

opinions4u

I paid £39 to get married.

Cost me a fortune since mind!

husband has just had £300 paycut due to having to change jobs

If ever there was a reason not to take on a new commitment this is it.

Out of interest, where did the £300 paycut and the £300 you are willing to pay for a loan get spent before?

kareliray

Thank you for all your replies.

I'm beginning to regret putting this thread on - yes bankruptcy has taught me a lot - that is why I have been debt free since and pay off my credit cards every month in full and won't ask for them to be increased and I haven't gone down the slippery route of getting an extortionate interest loan. I realise that being bankrupt gives me a bad credit rating and in some people's eyes makes me a loser but it wasn't a decision we made lightly at the time and sadly was our only decision. The fact I still have £300 a month that I can afford for a loan after all my outgoings are paid and we still have some spending money for going out occasionally also shows that I have learnt from being made bankrupt. Please forgive me for trying to make my daughters wedding the special occasion mine was and not a cheap affair - she has been through so much in her life she deserves it.

From one very sad lady who through no fault of her own was made bankrupt and is now, 3 years later, trying to have a normal life like most people do. Which is why I'm asking if anyone knows of a lower rate loan company that will accept my bad credit. Instead of the bashing I have just got from a few of you the answers from immoral_angeluk and darkblue were all I was really after (thank you to you both x)

kareliray

opinions4u wrote: »

Out of interest, where did the £300 paycut and the £300 you are willing to pay for a loan get spent before?

Travelling to work and we used to go out a lot more - we have cut our outgoings back as much as we can and stopped using credit cards so we can afford the £300. Husband is an assit manager now for a large brewery and has been told should be manager by end of this year so we will then have a lot more money for savings.

Thanks

ALIBOBSY

Although I think there is too much poster bashing on MSE, the posters on here have got a point. Does your daughter know you went bankcrupt and about her Dad's employment problems?
I bet the last thing she would want is for you to get into debt again for her, for one day.
You state your daughter and future sil are paying for most of the wedding themselves, but you want to give them 5k? With good planning and careful shopping a decent wedding could be done easily for 5-6k in total, spending 10-15k as your post suggests is simply crazy.

During the recent boom years too much credit and media/government/retailer pressure to spend spend spend, pushed this idea of the massive fancy wedding, but many look back a few years later divorced and still stuck with the debt.

The one thing you can offer your daughter which is free is time. Time to help planning, time to research and find the best deals, time to make things for the wedding, cake, dress, favours, whatever you can manage. They will have to scale the wedding down to what they can afford. Perhaps an offer of £300 a month for them to use towards deposits etc. plus plenty of time to help plan.
Both the wedding dress and bridesmaid dresses are much cheaper to rent (I understand about wedding dresses-if she must buy look in end of line sales etc and never buy the first you see), but never buy bridesmaid dresses.

Please be honest with your daughter and you will give her the greatest wedding gift ever- the lesson about saving for what you want, being wary of debt, and being canny with how much and what you spend you money on as well as sticking to a budget. These are lessons many of us had to learn through hard experience, but are the lessons that will help her to have a long,happy and stress free marriage.

ali x

kareliray

ALIBOBSY wrote: »

Although I think there is too much poster bashing on MSE, the posters on here have got a point. Does your daughter know you went bankcrupt and about her Dad's employment problems?
I bet the last thing she would want is for you to get into debt again for her, for one day.
You state your daughter and future sil are paying for most of the wedding themselves, but you want to give them 5k? With good planning and careful shopping a decent wedding could be done easily for 5-6k in total, spending 10-15k as your post suggests is simply crazy.

During the recent boom years too much credit and media/government/retailer pressure to spend spend spend, pushed this idea of the massive fancy wedding, but many look back a few years later divorced and still stuck with the debt.

The one thing you can offer your daughter which is free is time. Time to help planning, time to research and find the best deals, time to make things for the wedding, cake, dress, favours, whatever you can manage. They will have to scale the wedding down to what they can afford. Perhaps an offer of £300 a month for them to use towards deposits etc. plus plenty of time to help plan.
Both the wedding dress and bridesmaid dresses are much cheaper to rent (I understand about wedding dresses-if she must buy look in end of line sales etc and never buy the first you see), but never buy bridesmaid dresses.

Please be honest with your daughter and you will give her the greatest wedding gift ever- the lesson about saving for what you want, being wary of debt, and being canny with how much and what you spend you money on as well as sticking to a budget. These are lessons many of us had to learn through hard experience, but are the lessons that will help her to have a long,happy and stress free marriage.

ali x

Thank you so much Ali, your post was much kinder and very helpful. My daughter and sil do know about the bankruptcy and have scaled down their wedding to as little as they can (cutting out 2nd cousins etc) but sadly we both have big families. I hadn't thought of the option of giving them the £300 a month - brilliant and thank you that is what I will do - I feel a great weight has been lifted

best wishes
Karen xx

immoral_angeluk

When I got married it cost me 2k all in. Thanks to legal aid my divorce was free!

PNPSUKNET

100 people can be done for £6k easy, thats inc a good venue and £800 dress

iolanthe07

Thanks to legal aid my divorce was free!

You get legal aid for divorce? Blimey, no wonder the country is broke. Surely people should have to sort out their own mistakes without the rest of us having to pay.

Tammer

iolanthe07 wrote: »

Thanks to legal aid my divorce was free!

You get legal aid for divorce? Blimey, no wonder the country is broke. Surely people should have to sort out their own mistakes without the rest of us having to pay.

Hi,
If you just want to make snippy comments would you not be better off on Mumsnet?

immoral_angeluk

iolanthe07 wrote: »

Thanks to legal aid my divorce was free!

You get legal aid for divorce? Blimey, no wonder the country is broke. Surely people should have to sort out their own mistakes without the rest of us having to pay.

If you have any suggestions about how someone who was living on income support was supposed to pay for court and solicitors fees I'd be grateful of hearing it...