Disciplining the children how do you do it ??

Woby_Tide

savingcaz wrote: »

i know this sounds bad but don't give he any xmas presents lol.

we don't go that far but at this time of year we have seen improvements in some of ours behaviour by using losing presents as a threatl. Basically Father Christmas knows when someone is naughty and swaps a present out of their sack for a potato. So come xmas morning if there are any potatoes in your sack or stocking you've obviously been naughty and he saw it.

So there will always be a couple of warning potatoes in their sack, and they get to contribute to xmas lunch, and behave better. But they haven't lost any presents, they just think they have and are left to wonder what they might have got if they had behaved a bit more...

Caroline_a

Woby_Tide wrote: »

we don't go that far but at this time of year we have seen improvements in some of ours behaviour by using losing presents as a threatl. Basically Father Christmas knows when someone is naughty and swaps a present out of their sack for a potato. So come xmas morning if there are any potatoes in your sack or stocking you've obviously been naughty and he saw it.

So there will always be a couple of warning potatoes in their sack, and they get to contribute to xmas lunch, and behave better. But they haven't lost any presents, they just think they have and are left to wonder what they might have got if they had behaved a bit more...

Brilliant!

Jinx

Thinking back (my daughter is 18) I think the most important thing was consistency.... If you say 'yes' then keep to it, if you say 'no' NEVER change your mind. And decide on what is important to you and keep that in mind, don't worry about the little things...

Sanctions in our house - grounded rarely and deducted pocket money. Sent to bed early sometimes and ok I admit to throwing the hairbrush at her...:o Im a bad mother lol

mumslave

I am quite a strict parent, i think, in todays society. I am huge on manners including table manners. Huge on meal times and they get what they are given, obviously if they really dislike something its not given! Bed times, sleep is important and as someone with terrible sleeping habits, I dont take any nonsense at bedtime and the older two know it will get them nowhere to try it. I detest any sort of rudeness to adults, talking back, interrupting is all reprimanded. I am also big on hygiene. Aside from those things, I am very easy going with whatever else they do. I dont tend to interrupt arguements unless actually present as I believe when it comes to four kids all close in age, they need to establish positions and work some things out for themselves.

The kids are aged 5,4,2 and 9 months. With the older two, behaviour I find unacceptable always is reprimanded with telling them so and issuing a warning. If they then carry on, its the naughty step. On the naughty step, they do 5 and 4 minutes respective of age and they dont talk to me or mess about, they think about why they are on there. After the time is up, I ask them if they know why they were on the naughty step, discuss what they did that was unacceptable, discuss that they acted on feelings but there are better responses, then discuss how they might do things differently. I ask for an apology, then we hug and all is forgotton about. If the behaviour is severe I remove the beloved nintendo ds. I also use the count down method, 3. 2. 1. and have to say I rarely get to 2. With my two year old, he is obviously still a baby, but if he is doing something I dislike a lot, such as pulling the cat about, I make a point of getting down on his level, looking him in the eye, telling him in a low voice, no, and then show him how to do things in a nicer manner.

Despite all that, I am far from perfect and still have days where I discipline by yelling my head off and end up acting younger than they are. Such is life and tomorrow is always another day. I will say, kids do need consistency in my experience but its very hard to maintain that 100%. As long as its for most of the time, they will get there in the end. Most of all they need to know that although you might be unhappy with their behaviour, you are there to explain why and direct them and love them regardless.