Protecting your house from future Girlfriend

BitterAndTwisted

thewinkshow wrote: »

let me make my situation a bit more clear, If I met someone I would have zero problems splitting absolutely everything we acquired during our time together 50% straight down the middle.

This sounds entirely fair and reasonable.

Including any increase in the value of the house -because we both contributed to this during our time together.from day we met to us ending the relationship is 50/50 what I had before that is mine.

In my opinion this is the very last thing you should do, especially if you're not absolutely convinced that you're in a lasting long-term relationship. But if you are, you should get married. Then, the other person would have a 50% claim on everything unless you got an agreement drawn up beforehand.

My point/issue, is I would want assurances that before this 50% split on everything that my initial 40k deposit from my granddad was automatically allocated back to me, then we split the rest 50% down the middle. I think this is fair, as I had the 40k before I even met her.

You wouldn't need assurances for that last point, you can get a solicitor to draw up an agreement (A Deed of Trust?) to protect whatever you entered into a permanent arrangement with. Lots of people do this when buying a property together when the initial house-deposits are unequal or one person has assets that the other does not.

Coeus

Wee_Willy_Harris wrote: »

If you read the OPs question, it was about a co-habiting girlfriend, not a lodger. Surprised you didn't notice.

I did notice and a lodging agreement is not mutually exclusive of a co-habiting relationship. To break it down, one does not mean the other cannot be true. It is an effective answer to thewinkshows' main concern.

I would also ask that you do not apply your pre-conceptions of what I have or haven't noticed to yourself - it is rude to assume that I had not noticed. If my posts had indicated that, which I do not believe they have, you should ask rather than assume.

amcluesent

Now that pre-nups are recognised in the English courts, it can't be long before other statements between couples get drafted all the way back to a consensual intercourse agreement on 1st date to reduce the chance of the laydees crying rape.

Wee_Willy_Harris

Coeus wrote: »

I did notice and a lodging agreement is not mutually exclusive of a co-habiting relationship. To break it down, one does not mean the other cannot be true.

Oh yes it does.

thewinkshow

Bitter and Twisted - so basically all I need to do is get a deed signed, job done 40k protected. of course getting someone to sign this would be a touchy subject again, but as far as I am concerned they can do one if they dont understand me wanting to protect the money my grandad promised me, worked hard for all his life despite never earning more than a basic minimum wage - i will use this money as best I can to make him pround and get myself a property I would otherwise been unable to buy.
most of my family rent. I will protect this money as best I can.

BitterAndTwisted

Yes, you'd need to see a solicitor to get it drawn up. The thing is, by the time you've come to the realisation that THIS GIRL is the right one for you, you may have already been living together as it's not the sort of thing you ask the latest red-hot date to sign up to after only knowing her for a couple weeks.

Should you be dating someone seriously, the best thing is to not have anyone staying over seven nights a week, to give up her own place or get her up the duff before you're certain how you feel.

Jackinbox99

Ive been through all this in the past, so know from experience what someone is or isnt entitled to.

Essentially I was dating this girl, she moved into my house and we lived in my house for 3 years together. House, mortgage and all bills were in my name and I paid them all. We agreed an amount she would pay towards living in my house, which was about 300quid less than what she was currently paying in her flat.

She moved in, payed me x a month and saved £300 a month. I was happy, she was happy, everyone was happy.

Then 3 years later I split up with her and she moved back to her parents. I gave her the equivelent of what 3 months rent would cost her on a new flat as a good will gesture to ensure she could get setup and started off on her own. 70% of the furniture was hers, so obviously she took that with her, and id also paid for half her car, but let her off that, again as a good will gesture.

So all and all she came out of it very well, she`d saved 300quid a month for 3 years, got enough cash to start up in a new flat and gained a nice car out of it.

But then, the bitterness started and her parents egg`d her on to speak to solicitors to see if she was entitled to half my house. They sent a very threatening letter through asking to see all my financial details, savings details, earnings, items of value, to assess how much my ex girlfriend should get!

I spoke to 2 seperate solicitors and they both asured me that she wasnt entitled to a penny and id been more than generous. So, I wrote back telling her where to go and that was it.

How it was explained to me, is that if the house is in your name then its yours. Noone else is entitled to it. If she had been paying half the mortgage from the day she moved in, then she could possibly be entitled to half of any increase in value from that day onwards. But, she wouldnt be entitled to half the whole house - so any capital or money you put in, she wouldnt suddenly get half off.

Mr_Thrifty

The solution to this is quite simple really. Just follow these 5 simple steps.

1. Move into HER house, not her into yours. Then if you break up, try and claim half of HER house.

2. If she doesn't have her own house, then don't let her move in until you're married!

3. If she won't wait until you're married, get her to contribute something meaningful (i.e. big deposit) or go and rent a place together.

4. If she can't put down a big deposit and you don't want to rent somewhere else, then just take things slow. Gold diggers get impatient very fast! If she can't tolerate not living with you for two years (whilst still being in a loving relationship, just living in separate locations like they used to do in the good old traditional days before a couple were married), or she threatens to leave unless she moves in, then think yourself lucky - you just forced a gold digger to reveal her hand and in the process of doing so, saved yourself a lot of cash.

5. Whoever gets to this stage is marriage material and a safe bet.

Gwhiz

clutton wrote: »

OP- ignore the neg-heads.... i expect they are jealous of your position

Or just have a different view to you?

Person_one

I can't believe people are recommending not moving in together until married as a way to protect assets. Where's the smiley for a face palm?

Co-habiting is the time when you figure out if you can actually get along under the same roof, when you iron out all the differences in your approaches to finances, housework, social lives etc. and essentially do a 'dry run' without too much commitment.

If you don't learn until after you're married that you can't stand living together the divorce will be a lot more expensive than a separation of cohabitees!