Do you like being around children?

dizziblonde

ninky wrote: »

i think more surprising than some people's wish to not always be around children 24/7 is the attitude of many towards those who choose not to have children. here's a particularly vicious and nasty attack from that old favourite the wail. women who a willingly childless apparently lack "essential humanity" and are "weird". well that's nice.

The one thing I realise more and more as time goes on (and yes, life's been pretty cruel to us) is that those women who are childless through choice are pretty damned strong creatures. It takes one heck of a lot strength to be the ones going on the less-trodden path and constantly be judged as selfish or lacking in some way. I respect them for actively thinking about whether to have kids or not rather than drifting along on a wave of societal pressure like more than a fair few do. I wish to God more people would think through having kids rather than just drifting along with sentiments like some of the twaddle come out with here - that they're somehow obliged to turn out a new fireman or whatever... because that little thug bricking in someone's windows, that confidence trickster, that mugger... they're someone's child too (that wonderful argument cuts both ways).

I've taken crap for it myself - been told I shouldn't be doing the job I do because I don't have kids... which I think is completely unacceptable for anyone to turn around and say to a person (and considering my own circumstances - grossly insensitive but I'm used to that).

olly300

dizziblonde wrote: »

I've taken crap for it myself - been told I shouldn't be doing the job I do because I don't have kids... which I think is completely unacceptable for anyone to turn around and say to a person (and considering my own circumstances - grossly insensitive but I'm used to that).

Apart from being unacceptable those people are idiots. The fact that you don't have children means you have more time to spend with their children and won't go off mid-way through the year for the rest of the year.

Virtually all my teachers at primary school apart from 2 went off mid-way through the year on maternity leave. Off the two that didn't one was older and foreign so had a different view on working, and the other was just divorced.

michaels

That's a shame - my children's grandmother can not fly anymore but you would deny her the chance to ever meet her grandchildren in case they might annoy some people on a flight - nice.

ILW wrote: »

Maybe it is just me, but I would not take a four year old on a medium haul flight unless it was in some sort of emergency. Holiday at home untill they are old enough to appreciate the travel and are in a position to behave themselves and not disturb others.

treliac

michaels wrote: »

That's a shame - my children's grandmother can not fly anymore but you would deny her the chance to ever meet her grandchildren in case they might annoy some people on a flight - nice.

I'm sure ILW wasn't saying it like that.

When our children were little we didn't go abroad..... the hassle, the cost, an amazing Britain to see first, etc. etc. As they've grown up, their tolerance of travel and interest in going abroad have grown and we have taken foreign holidays as well as British ones.

However, if we had needed to fly in order for them to see their close family, that would no doubt have been quite different.

amcluesent

TBH them kiddies have only become a damned nuisance since Mr and Mrs Spank were stopped from visiting Bottom Land by the woollie left in the schools etc. Spare the rod, spoil the child!

dizziblonde

Hissing_sid wrote: »

Jeez. God forbid a child gets a little upset and makes a bit of noise on an aeroplane. Imagine the universe not being tailored 100% to your personal comfort zone....

At the same time - when you're stuck there, and you don't dare request to move in case it causes offence (seen the previous post about it) - it can be hell. You feel cornered, devoid of rights as a person and it's horrible - particularly in a confined place like a plane.

Like I say - I've had football outings ruined by being booted in the back for the full 90 minutes, when I turned around just to see exactly what was hitting me in the back of my neck at 30 second intervals... barrage of abuse. That's not on.

Yeah kids cry, but sometimes when you're stuck with a screaming kid, a parent with headphones in to shut the kid out, and no attempt being made to resolve the situation - that's just being inconsiderate.

And why the heck should those who don't want to listen to it be painted as unreasonable for wanting their comfort zones? They didn't choose to have your child - yet they're the ones being subjected to it while you shove headphones in and ignore the tantrum or whatever.

THAT'S what gets my goat.

Arcaine

ILW wrote: »

Maybe it is just me, but I would not take a four year old on a medium haul flight unless it was in some sort of emergency. Holiday at home untill they are old enough to appreciate the travel and are in a position to behave themselves and not disturb others.

He is usually very good with stuff like that. Its just he was nervous. Heck so am I when I fly. We hadn't been overseas for 5 years so wanted to see the big orange thing in the sky for a change. .

Davesnave

dizziblonde wrote: »

I've taken crap for it myself - been told I shouldn't be doing the job I do because I don't have kids... which I think is completely unacceptable for anyone to turn around and say to a person.

Prejudice varies over time. If you go into the history of teaching, you'll find that, not so very long ago, female teachers had to resign when they married!

amcluesent wrote: »

TBH them kiddies have only become a damned nuisance since Mr and Mrs Spank were stopped from visiting Bottom Land by the woollie left in the schools etc. Spare the rod, spoil the child!

As someone who knows about this, rather than reading about it, I would say that the most difficult children to control are those of Mr Thrash and Ms Cuff, who have not been 'stopped' at all. They tend to raise kids who only respond to one thing, and whose lack of concentration, reasoning skills and verbal ability make it hard for them to conform or succeed within a school environment.

The cotton-wool-cosseted loud mouths are something else, and somewhat easier to contain, though when informed about their wayward behaviour the parents frequently fail to 'get it,' or cry.

tyllwyd

I remember reading somewhere in the context of child protection, that the children who they worried about were the ones who turned up with their parents and would sit still and very quiet, not the ones who played up a bit, because it was the ones who were quiet who were too terrified to do anything that might annoy their parents.

Davesnave

tyllwyd wrote: »

I remember reading somewhere in the context of child protection, that the children who they worried about were the ones who turned up with their parents and would sit still and very quiet, not the ones who played up a bit, because it was the ones who were quiet who were too terrified to do anything that might annoy their parents.

Yes, like the psychologist who tried to assess my daughter. He made the mistake of taking a model cow from his drawer and, as an ice-breaker, said "Oh look what I have here, its a .....Oh, I've forgotten what they call these? Do you know?"

Absolute silence. Ten mnutes later after more of the same, we were shown the door.

Outside, I asked DD2 why she wouldn't speak to the 'nice man.'

"He isn't nice." she replied, "He's a liar. Grown ups don't forget what a cow is!"