I am now at rock bottom.

lozzam

Hi Roserose, I really feel for you - you feel like you are in a desperate situation. Just remember there are thousands of people who have reached the point you are in and have got through it. The one thing I want to add is that this doesn't mean you have to lose your job. In my experience, HR are pretty understanding - go talk to them and ask for their support in getting through this. They can help advise you how to get through this without breaking any of the rules of your employment, and they will keep your situation confidential. The last thing you need to do now is leave a job you love!

ms_london

Hello & welcome to MSE.

I would suggest cancelling your direct debits to your creditors that are due to go out in the next month - this will buy you a bit of time to negotiate a repayment you CAN afford. At the end of the day you cannot afford those repayments on your current wage, and that happens a lot, circumstances change, so do a proper budget (and post here if you would like extra advice) and then work out what you CAN afford to repay each month. If you are honest with them and communicate with them they are likely to be more understanding rather than ignoring their phonecalls and letters.

You haven't mentioned how much debt you are in, but if you are 35 and single with no dependants, you are probably in a better situation than most. I am 30 and was in debt to the tune of £19,000, yes it was hard, but I paid it off.

I would go down the route that others have suggested regarding your employer, but spend a few days sorting everything out so you can get it sorted in your head first and then go from there.

xx

sonnythecat

Roserose - just checking in to see how you're doing.

I was thinking that, in actual fact, you've reached a really important point - you sound as though you've decided "Enough is enough. Time to regain control."

And the thing is that once you roll up your sleeves and start tackling the debt, making those phone calls, telling the people who need to know, you will most probably feel loads better because you ARE taking back control.

And let me reassure you,, from experience:

1 They won't tell you off!!!!! ie, when you contact people to tell them you're in a muddle, they won't lecture you or be horrible to you, or judge you or criticise you. They've heard it all before.

2 you'll never find the perfect pathway through this situation. Every option you consider, every piece of advice will make you think "yes but....". No sense in wasting your energy trying to come up with the 'perfect path'.

Lots of love xxxxxx

ajrose13

Roserose, I used to work in HR in a high street bank. A previous poster (sorry, can't see who), suggested that your employer might have an employee assistance programme, or a counselling line, which you could call. I think this is very likely to be the case and I would really recommend it if there is. If you're feeling all alone with this, there will be someone there to talk to who will be on your side. You should not worry about anonymity - they are very professional.

My thoughts are with you while you work this through.

LisaPapakis

Are you sure you've got nothing to sell? Gold maybe? Clothes on ebay? Just a little cash boost to get you through the next few weeks?

gratefulforhelp_2

roserose wrote: »

Tanks for your reply Jim. I really do wish it was that simple but I think you have to close any bank accounts with an overdraft facility and I cannot do that as it is part of my contract that I keep my account with my empoyers open. Do you know if you do have to close your accounts? If not then I can certainly look at that but I cannot risk losing my job on top of everything else.

Are you using that facility? Could you pay off that bit and ask them to remove the overdraft facility but still keep the account open?