The Ultimate Incentive to get debt free… again. Dinah & NIM go head to head!

Dinah93

Lol. I'll take June's budget if she earns more!

Cinny91

Dinah93 wrote: »

Cinny, will you not miss the extra money? You've been saying recently how tight things are.

Oh no, don't worry. I won't deny we're always on a bit of a budget. But next month is extra tight due to the holiday (need extra fuel and entertainment pennies) and OH is only getting his basic wage as there wasn't any overtime last month. And the lack of money for car repairs is just because we're out of car season, so all that pot is just about empty (bar money for my car tax) we'll be alright in a couple months.

Dinah93

Ah fair enough, so long as you have a plan!

Birdie85

Tete_en_l'Air wrote: »

It's just upsetting you know, this time last year I was looking for a place to move in with my boyfriend, never imagined I's be in this position a year down the line, it's !!!!

:grouphug: Here's a dodgy hug Tete, I'm sure happy things are on the horizon for you, you deserve them!

Had a rotten lunch hour with OH, I asked him about painting the bedroom because Homebase have 15% off this weekend so we can save a bit on paint and he said no because we can't afford to 'waste' money on paint... even though he was quite happy to ask me if we could spend £20 of our money on an xbox controller last week as his was broken and I agreed! I'm sick of having a bedroom with mould stains on the walls and grubby marks... but as long as he can play on his precious game then that's OK! :mad: He found a card that is still waiting to be posted and had a go at me for not doing it, even though it's a wedding acceptance to his friend's wedding (that I made as I was ordered to do so by him) and I told him weeks ago that I wanted him to post it at the PO as it may be too heavy for a regular 1st class stamp! But no, that's my fault... just like all of the wedding thank you cards that went out late because he tidied all of our wedding cards away and wouldn't tell me the names of his extended family who gave us presents and needed thanking... and of course it was my job to write and send all of the freakin' cards, he didn't even come to the shop with me to buy them! :mad: I left him in a sulk because I'd dared to snap a little when he had a go at me! Grrrrr..... what were people saying this morning about wanting to live alone?! :rotfl:

Cinny91

Oh gee Birdie!! Me and OH have random blown arguements over silly little things like that that don't really matter too. I like to think it shows how strong a couple are as to how heated their arguements get Best leaving him to stew, I do that with my OH when he gets in a tuffle!

Just had my Brother in the office and he said my Cousin went to swing at him this morning, but my Uncle stopped him :eek: My Cousin is ex-army, pretty hot headed and by the sounds of it just flipped. I was gonna come in early too but decided to sleep in instead, I miss everything!

Dinah93

Urgh, really feel for you Birdie. It's not so much the card and the controller per say, as feeling alone and that you can't relly on someone that gets me worked up in that situation. Will you be able to calmly discuss it this evening and explain why you think paint is more important than a controller (and I certainly agree, mouldy walls need dealing with its bad for your health as much as anything - mouldtec paint from Dulux is excellent and only about 10% more expensive, will stop it coming back again) and get him to see sense, or is he a head in the sand type? My ex used to spend my (not our, he had none but we had a joint account for bills, more fool me) money on computer games all the time, and then we had nothing left for food or to put money on the leccy meter (meaning he couldnt play the games anyway!) and we'd end up overdrawn and get charges. He'd just get angry at me because it would deflect from the fact he knew he'd acted irresponsibly, but he didn't like it or want to change it - equivalent of a child throwing a temper tantrum. I think a lot of ladies end up with men a couple of years older as it takes them longer to mature into reasonable, rational human beings than women!

N.I.M

*ahem* younger by 20 months *ahem*

Dinah93

I'm well aware, I didn't say all women! You've still needed some sharp lessons in how upset it makes me to learn to take responsibility though.

Birdie85

I always miss the good stuff too Cinny! Sounds pretty wierd though, hope everyone's friends again!

OH isn't too bad, he does his bit but he has very selective hearing and hates being asked to do anything so files it away as 'not my problem' in the back of his mind then tells me off because the job didn't get done! I always seem to get lumbered with the rubbish admin jobs, calling people and writing letters which take time and I can't just whip up a letter in 2 minutes, it can take me hours to get it right; he gets really naggy I don't do it straight away... but never offers to do it for me! The thing with the paint is that he hates DIY so sees it as an unnecessary expense... whereas he loves TV so anything to do with that is all right! I'd go out and buy the paint myself but I don't have any spare money

He's also really bad at dealing with arguments, can never accept responsibility for his part in it and understand that if I snap at him it is because he has provoked me... he now understands that he does it but it still doesn't stop him from acting all sulky and quiet and annoying until I apologise for everything just so he'll get over himself and we can carry on as we were before the fight!

Cinny91

Birdie85 wrote: »

OH isn't too bad, he does his bit but he has very selective hearing and hates being asked to do anything so files it away as 'not my problem' in the back of his mind then tells me off because the job didn't get done!

Thought I wrote this for a moment! I found, don't know if it'll work with your OH, but Rich used to kick up a fuss if I asked him to do too much on his day off. So now when I'm getting ready for work and he's off I run of what I'm 'planning' on doing when I get home. Then I get home to find it all done Teehee! Where as before, he wouldn't do it because he hates being asked to do stuff, and I'd get upset he didn't listen to me and huffily do it myself. Same with arguements, my OH will never admit he was in the wrong even in the slightest so I just say sorry to get over it. He'll normally say sorry too afterwards, but being back on neat terms matters more than one little word.

Could it be a matter of him finding the card that was meant to be posted, and just brewing over it until you got home? Seems silly to me to make a fuss, I'd have just taken it to the PO if I had the morning off :undecided Hope he's more chipper when you see him tonight, hate that feeling of going home on a half ended arguement!