Its tough, it will get better and guess what its freezing brrrrr!

youngmummy

i dont know weather this is the right place to post but we are really struggling atm. hopefully by jan we will be back on track as wrote out a budget ect:D. im a bit worried about xmas i dont even have a tree or food yet. the only person i have 3 more people to buy for my OH MIL and FIL:mad:. hopefully i will get it sorted:o. we have been stuggling most of the year but the last 2 months have been really tough:mad::eek:. i hope it gets better it cant get much worse. we dont have any depts but wont be far away as really getting desprate.
any tips
sorry again if its the wrong place to post its just really getting me down

jamanda

Frugal - best wishes to you and your dad and stepmum. I hope he gets better soon.

Youngmummy - I think this is exactly the right place to post. Life is hard for many at the moment but everybody on here is supportive and will do their very best to help you.

Sorry Katholicos - I've missed your post somewhere along the line - best wishes to you too.

Red_Doe

Both Frugal and Katholicos, am hoping for the best for your dads and both your families. Huge hugs to you both, as you need them ((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))
sorry this is happening ladies. Stay as strong as you can.

icelandic_queen

Frugal and Katholicos I'm thinking of you both. Take care. XX

ceridwen

littleowl wrote: »

Yes - I am aware of this as is he. The fact that he was working 16 hour shifts with one twenty minute break which was completely against the European Working Time Directive has cut no ice.
But - as I said - in this climate I would have urged him not to resign and have little sympathy for his situation in that respect - although he is my son and I love him and hate the situation he is in, even though it is one of his own making.

16 hour shifts:eek::eek::eek::eek: - even with proper breaks thats horrendous. In fact he couldnt possibly have been having sufficient break time anyway - even if he was doing so within that 16 hour stint. Reason - because, by law, people have to have at least 11 hours rest in between each work shift. He couldnt possibly have had those minimum 11 hour rests at times I would imagine. Certainly if he was working 2 days running then he would have only had an 8 hour rest in between shifts.

Theres also the Working Time Directive - ie maximum of 48 hours per week to be worked ON AVERAGE unless the employee has signed an opt-out agreeing to do more than that.

I'm not at all surprised he resigned. It would have probably been a better idea for him to have just gone off work "sick" until they sacked him - and then he wouldnt have "resigned" IYSWIM. But thats benefit of hindsight.

In his position -it may be the best option for him to plead "constructive dismissal". That is what it amounted to in fact - on 16 hour shifts one has no option BUT to resign because they arent humanly possible and no remotely reasonable employer would even think of imposing anything like that on an employee.

i suggest you put up a query about this on the Employment Forum and hopefully one of the two "legal eagles" over there will come to your assistance. There are two of them I've noticed - SarEl (a barrister with a particular interest in employment law). She can be a bit "sharp" sometimes in her comments - but she is helpful and frequently looks round that Board and makes helpful comments. zzzLaizyDaisy used to be a solicitor and has subsequently had to ill health retire I believe. She might also spot it and come up with advice.

So - my suggestion is to detail off the circumstances in a thread on that Board and say that you are wondering whether your son could claim constructive dismissal. Two reasons for this:
- he might actually be able to do so and get compensated for such awful work conditions
- it might make it easier with the DWP than saying he "resigned". I think it might possibly help his case with them if he makes it quite plain that it was constructive dismissal and tells them he is looking into fighting it.

EDIT: try having a look round this site to see if you can find anything useful on "constructive dismissal":

http://www.tuc.org.uk/tuc/rights_main.cfm

"Constructive dismissal" is NOT an easy one to convince a Tribunal of - I guess thats because its so common for employers to make their employees' lives a misery deliberately in order to try to manipulate them into resigning...but I do think its worth investigating in this instance.

jackieglasgow

I just want to send my best wishes to Frugal and Katholicos about your fathers' illnesses, stay strong ladies.xxx

Youngmummy, don't panic!! Have you had a look at the Old Style Christmas thread for frugal ideas? I would also suggest talking to your mum and explaining the situation, I'm sure I would rather my child had no worries or stress than bought me a gift at christmas. Join your local Freestyle or Freegle in case someone is getting rid of their old tree if you desperately want one, and think about doing online surveys if you have spare time to make a wee bit extra (you can get paid this in Amazon vouchers for example) Most of all, remember that Christmas should not be a time of stress or unhappiness, and when all is said and done your loved ones would rather spend time with you than receive a gift which you have gone without a meal or essentials to provide.

littleowl

Thanks for the information Ceridwen, that's very helpful. He worked as an hotel manager and usuually put in around 60 hours but over only four days. He often arrived home at 2 am and was on shift again at 8am. I fully understand why he resigned just wish he had gone about it a different way. I'll explore the links you gave.

Mrs_Veg_Plot

I can remember my dad picking up a phesant from the side of the road that had not been there when he had driven along it half an hour earlier, he threw it in the back of his car whilst he was at work for the day. The only problem was it had only been stunned and had rallied around. Phesant poo takes some shifting.

Hi again, just editing this as I posted it at the end of a previous page and wanted to send best wishes to frugal and katholics.

elf06

I dont have much to say for this morning but I did want to echo all the support for Frugal and Katholicos. I can addm uch to what has been said here other than my thought and virtual hugs are with you both at this difficult time

sammy_kaye18

Morning all

I'm back finally - felt wobbly and funny headed for most of yesterday but a half decent nights sleep and I feel much better.

So am now catching up with comments etc.

lambanana --- Hope you feel better soon honey.

MARDATHA - "who have to sit in unheated homes shivering because they cant afford the heating, etc etc"

I know what you mean - I was talking to a local older lady and she has been struggling to heat her house to the point she has put a camp bed up in her living room so she only has to heat that room. :eek: bless her cotton socks. Luckily the village has a local scheme that was set up in memory of one of our rugby players who died of a mystery illness suddenly last christmas and the scheme helps village residents if loved ones get ill by paying for travel, overnight stays etc -- but might put it forward about this little old lady and see if they can help her out a little bit. Even if they organise a few residents to go over and do some DIY projects that might help insulate her house a little bit more.

LITTLE OWL......I have an eye condition which could mean I will lose my sight unless I receive a corneal graft....

My previous experience of corneal grafts is that they don't work very well. My boyfriend currently has his third corneal graft rejecting and will be taken back in soon to for his fourth transplant. The first time they did a partial graft that rejected near enough straight away, the second time due to their neglect the graft started shrinking and pulling on all the stitches and he almost lost his eye and was rushed in fro emergency treatment and had to spend a week in hospital due to them removing the graft straight away and needing to keep his eye safe, but he wasn't a priority surgery! :mad: and now this third one is rejecting. fingers crossed yours will go better for you x x x

RED DOE............Haven`t had the money to put any in the tank since. Only got the one open fire for heat. Just lately it`s been so cold, and I`m frankly dreading winter, got down to around minus twenty last year

Know the feeling chick - we keep getting down to our last £10 and I'm worried about how we are going to afford any more but luckily our money is spread out through the month so we only really get a week with no income. I have been scrimping on the gas/electric to pay other bills but get the feeling that isn't going to be an option any more with this cold weather moving in so quickly. Think I had better get my bum in gear with the winter preparations now. I'm dreading winter though although I find the weather after Christmas is worst and I'm hoping we wont get snow like we did last year. Its even to the point I'm considering buying Bruno a coat for when he's cuddled in his bed as I cant see any way of getting curtains over my front door and its draughty as hell in there and his bed is opposite it. Luckily he has the escape that he can go in the bathroom where the radiator is left on Luke warm and I keep a towel (purposely for Bruno) behind the door for him to sleep on if he feels a chill.

FRUGAL - thinking of you and your dad chick - hope he makes a speedy recovery and is home with you soon. Its amazing isnt it - even at gone 11pm there are still kind and loving OS members about. :A

YOUNGMUMMY - Welcome to the thread. I think this is absolutely the best place to post - there are lots of kind OS members and plenty of help and advice going if you need it. Look forward to reading your posts soon. How many little ones do you have? Boy or Girl?

On the poaching note -- I can remember my dad coming home with a big catch of fish and me sitting on the side in the kitchen watching him clean and gut it. I can even remember watching him squeezing all the eggs out of one fish and finding it interesting - shame though - none of us ate fish and he was the only person who would.

Anyway jobs for today,
+ sort Bens homework - need to go out collecting leafs/pine cones and find out what tree they are from.Going to have a look for unfound bramble bushes as well in process and walk pooch.
+ heat proof house! Have found out curtains I brought earlier in the year at a charity shop and they look like they are lined too but need to safety pin them to bedroom curtains. Did buy safety pins but be bu@@ered if I can find them now!
+ dig out and clean out caterpillar draft excluders - will keep them in the living room me thinks.
+ have sorted ben's draws and have a lot of Ben's old clothes so will see if there's something in there I can shrink to put on mutt because he's short haired JRT and feels the cold.
+ fleeces on sofa.
+ fleeces on beds.
+ need to find a way to block 2 drafts - one is a big hole in the wall but is a ventilation vent but some darling knocked the outside off so effectively a big hole in the wall now. Located behind the computer desk so bloody cold whilst I'm sat here. Second one is a draft coming round the edge of an ill fitting blind but don't have the money to replace the blind!

Also being taken up my in laws house later too so can steal some heat from them. : )

So have a busy day ahead. To all those who are feeling poorly/under the weather / depressed ---- huge hugs

Right off to try and find these blaaaaaady safety pins!
x x x