Benefits? Please can somebody help?

AsknAnswer2

MarthaF wrote: »

Thanks for replying.

I did have a look at the minefield of benefits which are potentially available, but tbh, the rate he would qualify for (if he qualified at all) for the DLA care component is only £18.95 per week.
It all helps I suppose, but it is not enough to get us out of the poverty trap we're in at the moment.

£18.95 a week is £75.80 a month. That's money you wouldn't otherwise have. If he does begin to receive ESA, and was also receiving DLA, he would get a disability premium added to his ESA of £28 per week on top. That bumps it up to £46.95 per week or £187.80 per month in addition to ESA.

Claim everything that he may be entitled to. Every tiny bit does help. When I was living in poverty, I'd have snatched that £18.95 per week if I thought there was even a remote chance I could get it, because it's food on the table.

Call 0800 88 22 00 on monday and ask for a claim pack.

C_Mababejive

MarthaF wrote: »

No to both, and definitely no to ECT, as it's a barbaric practice (rarely used now anyway, thank god), and it has no proven benefit.

My mother had it approx 25 years ago and the effects were awful. She spent months looking and behaving like a character from One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, it wiped out a huge part of her life, which she still has no memory of, and made no improvements to her depression whatsoever.

It seems like something needs to be done so maybe it might be possible to voluntarily have an overstay for some kind of assessment if that were possible?

ECT does have a bad press for sure though it has evolved somewhat from what i have read..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electroconvulsive_therapy

Oldernotwiser

MarthaF wrote: »

Yes he is, and we rent from a HA.

Have you looked at claiming HB?

Mojisola

As you're at the end of your tether, it would be worth getting someone to help you with the claims. Your local council should have Welfare Advisors. Ours have been very helpful - you tell them your situation and they will know what you can claim and will fill in all the forms for you.

Do you have any contact with support groups such as Mind - https://www.mind.org.uk/help? It can ease the burden a lot to talk to people who know what you're going through.

ed123_2

....until someone gets depression they have know idea what its like. You should try to get your husband to get his GP to refer him to you local Mind . They are a wonderful charity and offer drop in's where he can have a cup of tea & chat with others in the same situation. They also offer women's/mens group support groups- to discuss problems in a confidential setting, day trips, etc etc.
I would go to you local CAB booking an appointment & taking all papers with you to get advice on all benefits.
Re you own position if you are in such pain with your back perhaps you are not really fit for work (even if self employed). You and your family would probably then be entitled to more benefits. My sister has bad back pain and attends a "pain clinic" at the hospital. her consultant has suggested an operation as well but she too is very reluctant. (to which I agree). She has tried "alternative" medicines/procedures which have helped.
best of luck.....ed

pineapple123

Marydot,
One of the most unhelpful, unknowledgeable posts I have read on here for a while.

andyandflo

MarthaF wrote: »

Hi Linda,

He has tried various combinations of drugs over the last few years, and is now on venlafaxine which does seem to be the best one so far, as at least he's not sleeping all the time, and he isn't spaced out and zombie-like now.
I really think counselling would help enormously as I think his issues stem from a really bad childhood.
However, he is a typical man in that he finds it hard to talk openly about his past, and though he has been referred several times, he has yet to attend an appointment.

It's nice to have some support from someone who has suffered in a similar way, and I do hope you're on more of an even keel now. xx

Hi

I am a man and I know what you mean!!
I used to tell my wife that I was seeing the psyc. but never went. That is until she received a phone call and came with me every time just to make sure!
Yes it is hard for a guy to open up - I still wont discuss my problems with my GP - hence the reason why I can't access illness/disability benefits.

Good luck

alwaysonthego_2

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ERICS_MUM

C_Mababejive wrote: »

It seems like something needs to be done so maybe it might be possible to voluntarily have an overstay for some kind of assessment if that were possible?

ECT does have a bad press for sure though it has evolved somewhat from what i have read..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electroconvulsive_therapy

I've no doubt that this treatment can be highly effective for many, but personally I see it as very much a last resort when every other treatment has failed and the individual is absolutely desparate.

It's a shame that the OP's hubby is being a "typical bloke" (no offence ) and won't try counselling. I feel for the whole family.

bitsandpieces

MarthaF wrote: »

However, he is a typical man in that he finds it hard to talk openly about his past, and though he has been referred several times, he has yet to attend an appointment.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy tends to focus more on current ways of thinking than on past experiences. Might be worth considering from that angle - some details here http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/mentalhealthinfoforall/treatments/cbt.aspx

In terms of more 'manly' things to do, exercise may be of benefit in depression (and is generally healthy). Most anything would be fine, though people often seem to like BTCV's Green Gym http://www2.btcv.org.uk/display/greengym