Bridesmaid issues.............UPDATED

poppyscorner

Well............ she's no longer bridesmaid but I've got text messages full of abuse from her all afternoon telling me to go f myself and that I'm selfish and am just saying what I'm saying to because I can't have my own way !

She has vowed never to speak to me again

I feel terrible have been in floods of tears I'll stay out of her way don't think she'll even be at my wedding now

I think I did the right thing but I'm still very upset

Thanks for everything guys xx

Queen_B_3

Aww I'm sorry to hear this sad tale. You've still got over a year till the wedding, she may calm down and see the error of her ways. I hope she does and is still part of your day.

kazwookie

poppyscorner wrote: »

Well............ she's no longer bridesmaid but I've got text messages full of abuse from her all afternoon telling me to go f myself and that I'm selfish and am just saying what I'm saying to because I can't have my own way !

She has vowed never to speak to me again

I feel terrible have been in floods of tears I'll stay out of her way don't think she'll even be at my wedding now

I think I did the right thing but I'm still very upset

Thanks for everything guys xx

Poppy,

Personally I think it is for the best, she is IMO sounding and being very selfish, it is your day, and I wish you well.

gandy

poppyscorner wrote: »

Well............ she's no longer bridesmaid but I've got text messages full of abuse from her all afternoon telling me to go f myself and that I'm selfish and am just saying what I'm saying to because I can't have my own way !

EXCUSE ME!!! :mad: she had the cheek to say that you're being selfish after all her trantrums and chucking of toys out of the pram over the dress and shoes!!

sweet lord i'd have text her right back and told her to have a good look at her behaviour over her attitude towards me and to get a grip on reality.

and why shouldn't you have your own way is your wedding day which she was trying to control by being a little b**ch

i'm sorry that you feel bad but i think you've managed to have a lucky escape because i feel she would have caused nothing but problems on the day itself an possibly ruined it for you.

i'd really have a sit down with your mum and dad and have a talk with them about her she really needs to be told to get a grip and it would be best probably coming from them. I hope to god if she ever gets married she has a nightmare of a bridesmaid that shows her what she's putting you through.

*hugs* for you hun and try and not to worry about her she probably will come round but in my book she doesn't even deserve to be a guest at the wedding with her horrible attitude!

BillTrac

She's 24?
tell her to grow up and stop acting like a 4 year old.

Stop all the !!!!!footing and either tell her to step up to the mark, or tell her to p**s off.

DO NOT LET HER RULE/SPOIL YOUR DAY

What is it with some people?

She sounds like she is a spoilt !!!!!

fran-o

so sorry that things have gone badly. I agree with Queen_B that it might be good to wait a while and review it, you have plenty of time til the wedding so you could afford to wait and make choices on dresses etc next summer when you are sure whether or not you want to include your sister. I would regret losing the relationship with my sister and upsetting family over my wedding, sounds like its just spiralled out of control, but after some time you might both be prepared to make some compromises (ie your choice of dress, her choice of shoes)
Good luck x

poppyscorner

Thanks for your responses I'm still really angry today but have calmed down quite a bit from yesterday ..............

I still havent heard from my parents yet but no doubt they have a twisted version of what happenned and at some point I'll get a call telling me how unreasonable I am !

I think your right and we may well calm in time and speak again but I don't want her to be my bridesmaid anymore If she was to play any part it will be in a role I can easily fill if she starts with her mouth again such as a witness !

If there was an award for the most unsupportive MOH she would win it hands down lol

I'm still hurting about the things she said, my mother is very much the same kind of person as my sister but she does consider people before she speaks and will always apologise when she is wrong and she is my mother so we can argue and speak in the same day really and it's very rare but I think my relationship with my sister should be more friend like and were just not in that place we don't really get on and I had hoped the wedding would bring us closer I think I may have been a bit naive there.

I wouldn't tolerate a friend speaking to me like that and I'm not taking it from her I don't have to all of the aggression in the texts that followed our talk/row there is simply no need for it

xx

bubbles0169

imo good riddance! now you can consentrate on what you and h2b want with out wondering if naggy nickers would approve!
enjoy the wedding planning from now on in
if your mum and dad say your being unreasonable than id say i cant believe you think that after every thing she has put me through, all those times shes slammed the phone down on me and all the time im the one whos trying to compromise on my day, now whos unreasonable?

maggie111

poppyscorner wrote: »

I think my relationship with my sister should be more friend like...

Please for gawd's sake don't "shoulda woulda coulda" about families. They are what they are and no amount of wishing on a star will change that. It brings peace to know that's just how they are and the relationship they create with you is how they like it.

In fact pushing to change it and force it into something that's not often causes the most friction.

(I am saying this as a younger sister whose brother can't stand the sound of my voice. I have learnt to be quiet and it keeps us both un-frustrated.)

bubbles0169

ah maggie thats soo sad if it was me though id be shouting :rotfl: