Thrilling Thursday 9th September Daily chat

tenmah

Evening.

I am currently trying to write a job application form but am rapidly losing the will to live! I wish I could just write it in a straight forward way instead of all the jargon and buzz words you are supposed to use! I am no good at that sort of thing and I hate interviews but just feel that my current job doesn't challenge me anymore, although I wouldn't want to give it up. The job I am applying for is for 18 hours a week, within the same office so I have asked if I could do both jobs, especially as the new job is only for 6 months. It is a grade higher than I am on now, and would give me experience in managing people. I have managed people before but they were really good workers and so really i didn't have to do anything but sign their leave cards!!

I have text a friend to ask her for her help as she is excellent at using the right words.

scaredy_cat

eekk!! 12 mins left on my bid!

tenmah

scaredy_cat wrote: »

eekk!! 12 mins left on my bid!

Good luck - fingers crossed. Snipe as late as you can!

Burlesque_Babe

you aren't being selfish at all Gemmzie. At the end of the day, we're all individually responsible for what we do in life and as much as others can support and offer help, if they won't take responsibility or move forwards then you are doing the best thing for you and them.

My ex is very similar. I've helped him probably more than I should since he was made redundant. I've helped him reduce his necessary outgoings - mortgage rate, council tax benefit, said to get a water meter. I helped him swap all his CC to 0%. I emailed jobs I saw that could be stop gap opportunities. I said to try to stop spending as much money at the supermarket (he spends HUGE amounts each month). The upshot is that the 0% rates all ended and his debt increased. He realised too late that a job wasn't going to fall into his lap and that living off his CC's has now drowned him. He has had to put the house up for sale, it's now sold at a hugely reduced asking price and although he'll clear the mortgage and debt he will have half the equity he should have. I couldn't do anymore, in the end, he made his choices and has to live by them.

As I said the other day, I am weirdly envious he has the opportunity to move to rented accommodation as he has the chance to choose somewhere he could never buy, I think he finds it liberating and is looking forward to it now . Perhaps it will help him to carve out a new life and by letting your parents make their choices, perhaps eventually they will eventually feel the same.

You've supported them hugely - don't ever think you haven't.

scaredy_cat

i am tenmah!!

Gemmzie

Will be gutted to lose my home though - I mean I know we're looking to move in 2011 but I grew up here

tenmah

That will be hard Gemmzie, but you will always have the memories of your home. I moved from my last place after being there for 26 years. It was really hard, so I know what you mean, but you will be able to make a new home with your lovely bf.

beanielou

Hate to say it Gemmzie but you are right, they are selfish.

clairewop

Well kitchen is starting to look very bare Given up for the evening now.

Burlesque_Babe

I know how you feel Gemmzie. My ex is selling the house we bought together and I lived in for 11 years. In the 7 years since we split, I've been back at least 3 times a week for Charlie and so it still is a part of my life. I cried buckets the day he put it up for sale and I cried when he phoned to say he'd accepted an offer. The day he leaves the house I know I'll cry again. (hell, I'm nearly doing it now).

I am trying to compensate that by knowing he feels at peace with his choice and in that it is helping me. For me, my feelings are partly guilt ridden feelings - I left him - but I think he will be fine and I am now helping by accompanying him to look at villages/areas he is looking to rent in which is actually quite exciting and he is enjoying getting out and about around the county. If we'd still been together, I doubt I would have found MSE and would definitely not have cleared all my own debt 3 or 4 years ago. Him not being in a job could well have sunk us anyway so I think the path was already laid out for him, despite me going.

You have a wonderful life ahead of you and you'll always have memories of your home.