Dummy debate

kafkathecat

My ds had a difficult birth and spent most of his first year screaming. I carried him around all day to soothe him and breastfed he also had a dummy. He gave it up without a fuss at around age 2. At 2 and 1/2 he had cranial osteopathy which really helped calm him, if only I had known of it sooner.

Basically some babies benefit more from dummies than others so please try not to be judgemental.

heretolearn_2

Mine had one, breast-fed fine for 11 months, no issues giving up dummy as a toddler and could talk the hind leg off a donkey from a very young age. Everyone else I know who's used them has had no problems. So, I think we mostly hear about them when they cause problems (maybe, I think it's an easy thing to blame when the kid might have had the same problem anyway) rather than the ones where it's just a useful tool and has no negative effects. After all, we don't talk generally about the things that go well do we!

I think it's down to the parents. As a breast feeding mum I was quite glad to have something other than my boob to pop in his mouth when he just wanted comfort, not feeding.

NAR

My grandson uses one when he has colic problems, as it helps him push. He also has it when going to sleep, but spits (literally!) it out when he is asleep some minutes later. At other times he has no interest in one.

kegg_2

I would rather my child had a dummy than sucked his thumb.

You can always take a dummy away but it is the devils own job trying to break a child of a thumb sucking habit

McKneff

fernliebee wrote: »

I am really judgemental about them tbh. I think they are fine for babies, but I hate seeing children with them. Fair enough if they have them for bed or round the house, but out at the shops, or worse when they are trying to talk.

My DD's are 26 months, and 2 months and I haven't needed a dummy for either of them. DD1 was just ridiculously placid as a baby, rarely screamed, just the odd cry when tired. DD2 prob could have done with a dummy at first but she is chilling out now. For the first 6 weeks she would just feed constantly, never coming off herself, I just had to take her off if I needed to see to DD1. She also cried a fair bit, but would happily suck my finger for hours if I would let her. Now though she is getting into some sort of routine and has bigger feeds, more spaced out, and is happy to be awake etc.

I know it isn't factually correct, but I always just assumed they were a bottle feeding thing, as IMO if DD can't be calmed by a feed then a dummy wouldn't sort it- so I feed her!! I know people give them for other reasons though.

Ultimately, despite my mean, judgemental view of them, I don't think any worse of people who give them, I just don't see the point in them myself, and can't understand why some children have them so long, just because I haven't gone through it with mine, I'm sure I would feel differently if I had to take one off my DD's.

I agree wholeheartely with this. Older children walking around with their dummies stuck in their mouths is ridiculous.

I also think they are filthy and riddled with germs.

I gag when i see a parent pick a dummy up that a child has dropped, suck it themselves and then stick it in the childs mouth.
The transfer of germs is horrendous. YAK

gunsandbanjos

My DD has never had a dummy, my hubby and i agreed before we had her that we would not use a dummy as neither of us like them.

I hate seeing 3 or 4 year olds wandering about with dummies!

Lalaladybird

angelicmary85 wrote: »

As Ticklypenny said, they seem to solve all of life's little dramas for little people but I prefer to comfort my children if they fall down or are tired

So do most mums who give their lo's dummies....doesn't make us bad mummies!

maisiescamp

I gave my DD1 a dummy at a few days old, she was breastfed for 8 monhs and it never caused a problem. She never had her dummy alot, just now and again and she gave it up herself at six months.

My DD2 also had a dummy from a few days old, again breastfed for 14 months and it caused no problems at all. However she adores her dummy and would happily have it in her mouth all the time if I let her! She is 18 months old now so I have just begun to try phasing it out as I really do hate to see older children with them.

Each to their own though, it is something that some people for whatever reason are completely against. From my personal experience, it helped settle mine and gave them comfort and it has had no adverse effect on breastfeeding or their speech.

kegg_2

McKneff wrote: »

I agree wholeheartely with this. Older children walking around with their dummies stuck in their mouths is ridiculous.

I also think they are filthy and riddled with germs.

I gag when i see a parent pick a dummy up that a child has dropped, suck it themselves and then stick it in the childs mouth.
The transfer of germs is horrendous. YAK

Holds my hand up as i did this:D but i dont think it does any harm to share a few germs with your kids. I dont have any germs that are going to kill them and all children need to build up a healthy immune
system.

Caroline73_2

My eldest didn't have a dummy and sucked his fingers - He is now 12 and having to have orthodontic work. I was told by dentist, oral surgeon, orthodontist etc, that his problems are due to the finger sucking. I could stop him sucking his fingers in the day but he used to do it in his sleep so I could not control it, it only stopped when he got wobbly teeth at 7.

My youngest started to finger suck so I gave him a dummy. He only had it for naps and sleeping, I used to take it out of his mouth once he'd fallen asleep though. he had stopped using it by two at the latest, I can't remember when exactly.

I really hate seeing older children with them, and babies who have them in all the time, but I also hate the judgemental attitude of people who think that if a parent chooses to use a dummy it means that they are using it all day everyday and as some kind of substitute for love and affection towards the child.