Dummy debate

nottslass_2

mummyemmy wrote: »

Hate dummies!! Didn't use one with my first daughter or my second. Did have one in the cupboard when they were born....just in case, but so glad we didn't use it.

Can't bear to see them in babies or toddlers mouths. Some parents shove a dummy in their childs mouth as soon as they make the slightest sound, when all they may need is a cuddle, food or entertaining.

One of my friends asked if I'd "managed to get my baby onto a dummy yet"!! It was like I needed to get her on one!! When I said I had no intention of using one she looked in shock!

Yes, my baby sucks her thumb, but that doesn't worry me in the slightest....my husband always sucked his thumb but he has the straightest teeth going and a thumb is natural a great big plastic dummy isn't!

To be fair the same argument can be used against thumb sucking.

I cant see what the difference is between a baby sucking thumb or dummy - they are both sucking for the same reason !!

As a reformed thumb sucker,I was quite happy to shove a dummy in my DS's mouth as alternative to his thumb - unfortunately thumb sucking tends to carry on longer than dummy sucking which in turn can leave an older child being teased by their peers when caught subconsciously with thumb in mouth aged 5 or 6.

The plus point for dummies is that at least you can send them to the "dummy fairy" as they get older - can't do the same with a thumb.

barbiedoll

I just had to come on and reply to this thread, it made me laugh! Mums whose kids are happy to use dummies have nothing but good to say about them but a lot of parents do tend to be a bit "snobby" about them. (Until they have a baby, that is!) I must admit, I do hate the sight of a toddler sucking on a dummy, especially when they have to take it out of their mouths to speak, I think that it discourages speech and language development because the children miss out on that "nonsense" speak stage. I love hearing toddlers speak in their own language that only Mum can understand, I think that dummies keep kids TOO quiet. Having said that, a dummy can be a life-saver if you have one of those babies who just like crying for no reason. If my (breastfed) son had taken a dummy, I would have been ecstatic at the time, and I had a full range of shapes and sizes but unfortunately, he would not suck anything that didn't have milk coming out of it

I work with pregnant women and with mums and newborn babies and if anyone needs an excuse to use a dummy, some research that was carried out in (I think) New Zealand recently, showed that babies who slept whilst sucking a dummy, had a slightly decreased risk of SIDS; the researchers believe that it may have had something to do with keeping the babies airway open whilst asleep. I know mums get a lot of conflicting information from health care experts and I also know that many of them have rather strong opinions about child-rearing, despite not being parents themselves. I always tell my mums that they will have plenty of other reasons to feel guilty whilst their children grow up, my son recently told me that he is being bullied because he's the only one of his mates who doesn't own an 18 rated violent video game. He's 12!!!! (And no, he's not getting it, he'll just have to get bullied and live with it :rotfl:) A dummy is the least of a parent's worries.

woohoo

My dd had a dummy until she was about 3 (not out in public when older - just for bed). She loved that dummy only the cherry teat though - nothing else would do!. Ahh - the mmmm mmmm mmmmm noise of enjoyment she made LOL!! Despite the dummy love it was easily given up - swapped for a bit of chocolate - and never asked for again. DD spoke very early and the dummy never stopped this - she has lovely teeth too!! DS would not have a dummy for love nor money. Tried every shape and size!! He sucks his thumb though. First day at school today - bless!! Still sucks his thumb in bed and when very tired. His thumb is a bit wrinkly at times, and the skin drier. What to do though - can't remove the thumb!! I spent hours pondering the fors and againsts of dummies when the kids were tiny. Was it right to give them a dummy? What would others think? Would they get sticky out teeth? What if DD would never give it up blah blah blah. Now I can put it into perspective. If the little one is happy then whatever. It won't be forever. There won't be any dummies at school. How many 16 year olds suck their thumbs? Do whatever you feel is right, and don;t spend too much time worrying about it. I say this as someone who did spend time worrying!! I wonder why now! Enjoy your babies - they will be at school before you know it!

[Deleted User]

Woohoo, i think your spot on, that is my major concerns, "are we doing right giving the children dummies, what do others thing, are their teeth ok, if we didn't what would they subtitute it for, worry, worry worry". At the end of it all, and we've discussed it at length, we've decided to let it be for now, they get so much enjoyment and comfort, it enables us to cope at the end of a long day, so far dentist is happy with their teeth and we have restrictions on them.

So as someone else said, if we are happy, kids are happy, what has it got to do with anyone else!

Having said that, i'm suprised as anyone else that they are still around, i personally didnt think we would be using them at going on 4, but hey ho.

And to MDW, i've also planted the same seed, albeit a few months ago. Now and again Jack mentions the dummy fairy and "Your not going to give my dummies away yet are you mummy?".

Tigsteroonie

barbiedoll wrote: »

Mums whose kids are happy to use dummies have nothing but good to say about them but a lot of parents do tend to be a bit "snobby" about them. (Until they have a baby, that is!)

*sticks her hand in the air :rotfl:

I have to admit, we were adamant throughout the pregnancy that we wouldn't let Andrew have a dummy ... until we did. :cool:

[Deleted User]

I was open minded as i remember seeing cine photo footage of me standing onthe back door step with a nappy half hanging off me and a dummy in my mouth, grinning ear to ear, i would have been 2ish.

I had them on the list of baby stuff to bear in mind and we bought one shortly after Jack was born and he settled instantly. Nothing changed since!

Edited to add, i don't know if it bears any significance, but i was prem, born 26 weeks, so i might have been given a dummy early to help with the sucking reflex, i don't know, i'll ask my mum when i was first given one, but she doesn't remember many things like that or gets her dates wrong.

Felicity

I was determined not to have a dummy for my little boy but at a few weeks old we did try him with one ..... ahhhhh, I realised WHY they are called 'soothers'. As a baby, his dummies made his life so much more comfortable. I am not a lazy parent by any means and I appreciated the comfort they gave him.

At about 1 year old we stopped giving him the dummies during the day and a 2 years old we engaged the 'dummy fairy' to come and take them for night time too.

He has not had dummies for about 6 weeks now. He was absolutely fine with them going BUT he has does not settle as easily now, he wont have his daytime sleep (which he probably still needs) and he gets up earlier in the morning.

From hating dummies in the early days, I now actually think they are a good parenting aide, if used in moderation.

Pre-having my little boy, I had such perfect ideals about parenting. Now I think ... never judge until you have walked a mile in their shoes. All children are different, some gain real comfort from having a dummy to suck on. I have seen friends babies who cried, cried and cried and I am sure if their parents hadn't of been so stubborn, they would have had a happier childhood.

Oh and our dentist is totally happy with our decision too.