Money Moral Dilemma: How much board should I charge?

gaily

Compingirl wrote: »

Of a suggested wage of £800 pm we agreed £150 as a fair amount board, plus £100 savings towards future cars and holidays. He was shocked that once he leaves FT education I won't be giving him spending money, paying his phone contract, bus fares or sports fees!

OH and me agree that we would like to put all or some of this board money into a secret saving account to give him as a house deposit etc when he finally leaves home

Isn't it amazing how kids think that the luxuries they enjoy while being kids at home will still be paid for by someone else when they make it into the big wide world, or are suprised that the parents won't keep paying for them when you start work.

I commend the secret stash of cash idea - especially as most posters think that the sum of £30 isn't going to break the bank for the household one way or another.

It doesn't diminish the idea of your young person treating money responsibly, but may give a child who's decided to make it on their own - and is now going to be facing rent/mortgages at REAL rates (not just £30 weekly) - a chance to put some money into a deposit. It could well be what finally gets them out of your house at that stage, and not being someone who can never afford to move away

I know that when i graduated, i paid £100 monthly to my parents whilst i lived at home, but never had any savings to rub together, I spent what I had. Many other people will be the same situation, and to be given a chance of a deposit on a mortgage - rather than having to rent can only be a good thing, especially if said child has then learnt the value of such a handout.

nyorks1503

Our daughter hated paying us for her board when she lived at home which led to so many arguments that in the end we asked her to leave. She is now paying in excess of £300 per month rent in a shared house, has to buy her own food etc. How she misses the halcyon days of giving us £30 a week all in! Don't let her get away with it and make her pay up let her go out in to THE REAL WORLD and see how she gets on with her £20 a week!

jubarnes26

silvercar wrote: »

My son has friends at uni that can't afford to go home in the holidays because, if they do, their parents charge them for being at home! I find that desperately sad; they miss their family, their siblings miss them, but their parents' insisting on charging them for being at home means they can't afford to do it.

That is just really sad - but then we don't know their situation, unless they genuinely can't afford to feed them in which case the student could get a summer job to help out surely running costs of the house would not increase that much in 6 weeks?

Having been told I couldnt go back home (when I asked for genuine reasons I was buying my own house & it would only be temporary) I know exactly how this feels at it's not nice I can tell you.
I cannot imagine ever letting my kids feel there wasn't a home for them here.

DC.MILKO

When i started work my mother said no aurguements im taking a THIRD NO MORE NO LESS.
THIRD TO SPEND
THIRD TO SAVE
AND A THIRD FOR ME

I WAS AN APPRENTICE SO I FOUND IT WORKED VERY WELL.
I NOW NAVE TWO GROWN UP KIDS AND UNTILL THEY LEFT HOME,
I DID THE SAME. PLAIN AND SIMPLE.
THIRD. SIMPLES :j

kinkyjinks

MDE wrote: »

Made to leave home, how lovely! I'd be sure to go back and visit regularly for all family occasions.

Oh yes, we're very close :rotfl::rotfl:I moved 250 miles away;) Their loss, not mine. I've got 3 kids and can't imagine treating them the same way and would be heart-broken to have the same relationship with them as I had with my parents.

silvercar

nyorks1503 wrote: »

Our daughter hated paying us for her board when she lived at home which led to so many arguments that in the end we asked her to leave. She is now paying in excess of £300 per month rent in a shared house, has to buy her own food etc. How she misses the halcyon days of giving us £30 a week all in! Don't let her get away with it and make her pay up let her go out in to THE REAL WORLD and see how she gets on with her £20 a week!

So you've lost your daughter for the sake of board money.:( yet you are happy about it:(:(

gaily

silvercar wrote: »

So you've lost your daughter for the sake of board money.:( yet you are happy about it:(:(

All little birds have to leave the 'safety' of the nest at some time. Otherwise our houses wouldn't be big enough!

Sometimes they need a push - and £30 weekly shouldn't be classed as a push, it's an easy ride in my eyes.

.....And thinking of that, you get 3 generations and extended families living under the same roof in some cultures - I bet they pay over far more than £30 week, all money into the pot, and get an allowance out of it.

HappyMJ

DC.MILKO wrote: »

I DID THE SAME. PLAIN AND SIMPLE.
THIRD. SIMPLES :j

It's not as simple as that. A third may not leave enough for them to be able to live on. Travel expenses may take a up a large proportion of their salary and especially if they have a car with the high insurance premiums that go with being young. It must be negotiated. A third of a young persons salary could be more than enough to cover all the household expenses with cash leftover and make a profit. I used to have a short term contract many years ago earning £25 per hour. Are you suggesting I should have paid a third of that. A third would have been around £240 per week after tax.

gaily

Just having had another thought about everyone mentioning 1/3rd's or more, maybe the best way to would be to sit down and work out what she does have as disposable cash.

£200 in per week
Out per week:-
£10 Mobile
£10 Gym
£20 commuting
£10 lunches
£30 towards student debts (as i'm sure (s)he may have them)

Take out everything she has contracts or commitments for

Then out of the remaining £120 weekly she can commit to saving £40, using £40 for going out/clothes etc, and then the final £40 could contribute towards the household.

This way, if she spends £40 weekly on car insurance (for example), she may have less to save, or to put into the household, but she is budgeting.

These figures for going out etc sound fantastic to me - I'd love that a month, the real world eats up more of my money than that. I occasionaly get out and have 1 or 2 drinks at th epub if I'm lucky, and find someone to babaysit for free for me (ie the ma-in-law!)

kinkyjinks

To put things into a different perspective, the lad of one of my friends moved into a hostel to be with his gf. They both paid £17 a week. For that they got a shared room and breakfast. There were washing facilities which they were charged £1 per wash (don't know if this included drying it too). They had to provide their own evening meals etc. They have now moved into separate YMCAs and get charged £8 for their room and have to pay for all other bills. The charity which runs the YMCA claims housing benefit for them both so I guess the £8 they are charged goes towards their electricity. No meals cooked for them, no landline, no internet access and no family there.