First baby on the way, tips welcome!

SPL

Firstly congratulations - i remember that excitement and now am lucky enough to have two wonderful sons

When i was pregnant with the second we stocked up on as many non-perishables as we could when special offers were on - not just the baby stuff - (this does depend on you having some space to store it) but bought tinned foods, toilet rolls, kitchen rolls, toothpaste, washing powder and conditioners, foil, cling films, bleach, washing up liquid etc etc

This really really helped as we went down to SMP only but basically meant that during the time off (I had a year with the second baby) all we generally needed to buy was fresh foods, perishable stuff. It was also good because you could bide your time to ensure you bought things when they were on the best offers and also by spending a bit more before the baby comes you get used to living on a lower amount of disposable income

Hope this helps (oh and if you dont go down the route of cloth nappies then dont underestimate how many you need of the first size - tiny babies go through more than 10 a day sometimes when they are brand new

enjoy every second it is the best thing in the world
:T

ironman1

Was thinking about our outgoings and how we would do for the six months or so that my gf gets none or only some sort of money next year.

My money has gone down to around £1320 a month because of hours etc being cut and our outgoings are around £1200 a month. Thats including food shopping etc by the way. We cant really get it lower than that. We have savings but don't want to use it all up if possible.

Looking at it on paper it seems we will struggle alot

ironman1

I can probably get a bit of weekend work but then I wouldn't even get alot of time with the baby! Suppose ya can't have it all though eh.

The good thing is out of that money we wont need clothes etc as we should have enough saved from now till birth date to get everything and have money left over for new clothes as he or she grows.

ema_o

I'm sure she will get at least SMP for 9 months, so once she stops getting full pay that will be half of the remaining 6 months she will be getting just over £100 per week.

With my work we continue to accumulate holiday pay while on maternity and have to take it at the end of maternity leave. For me that means about 5 weeks at full pay at the end of maternity. If this applys to you it might be that you only have 2 months with no pay at all.

I was talking to a friend about this and he said that in the first 6 weeks (while his wife was on 90%) they didn't spend much at all, so they're saving that towards the end of maternity so she can take the whole year off. If your OH is on full pay for 6 months, could you manage on half of thatn over that time and save the rest for the 6 months when she gets much less, does that make sense?

I am about as far along as your OH so have read this with interest. OH and me are planning to sit down and work all the finances after the 12 week scan, it will be tough but I think we can do it. I suspect we will reduce our mortgage payments while I'm off work, as we have been overpaying for a while as well. I certainly wouldn't want him to work overtime and miss out on time with the little un!

ironman1

I don't want to take a mortgage payment break but know that we can. We've overpaid around £6k in the last 14 months aswell so wouldn't feel 'guilty' if we reduced our payments.

I shouldn't say this but getting my gf to save is really hard. Thought it would change with a baby on the way but she is only really interested in putting her monthly set payment towards the bills and mortgages and nothing extra. Whereas I don't mind putting an extra couple of hundred in the pot.

Afterall, it all helps towards her having a year off with the baby so I think its a bit unfair that she won't put more in while she can. But if I argue that, I get the 'oh I might aswell put all my wages in to make you happy!'.

All a bit childish I think. Its obvious that we need as much as possible saved up for her time off and towards baby bits. Why she gets like this I don't know. Great in every other way but a pain in the axxx when it comes to money!

I know everyone wants a life, I still go to watch football and to the pub etc, I don't want her to be left with nothing but at least be reasonable, she's gone off going out as it is because she cant drink so it baffles me where her money goes to be honest.

As I said other than money she's great. I think she's still struggling after two years to come to terms with putting half her wages towards bills rather than give her mum something like £40 a week and spending the rest on clothes and presents etc

LilacPixie

Iron - trying to have a rational conversation with a pregnant woman is impossible. She will either huff or cry plus TBH she is possibly trying not to think of the whole having a baby thing because well its scary and there is always the fear something is wrong.

ironman1

Oh I understand that, we are both worried something could go wrong. Thats why i'm trying not to argue or stress her out. The thing is she's been this way about money since we moved in, not just since the pregnancy!

I'd never deliberatly try to wind her up or anything, just wish she'd be a bit more sensible because of the circumstances.

She's left with about £350 a month and hardly goes out unless its with me and friends where I pay anyway! I know women need their shoes and clothes but she rarely gets that either.

Blue_Monkey

Perhaps you should lightly suggest that she goes back to work and you stay at home?

My colleague at work stopped drinking and going out (as much) during his wife's 3rd trimester. Saved a load of money AND lost a stone AND had a happy wife! :T

LilacPixie

hehe iron I'm 16 weeks gone and tbh the wind up doesn't have to be deliberate but still happens. This is 3rd time around for us and my OH still hasn't learned. I could of cheefully choked him at 4am this morning

Anyway look at this http://www.silvercross.co.uk/our-range/pushchairs-strollers/dazzle/

Personally I fancy this and its a total steal at such a low price.

ironman1

I'm not saying I go out alot maybe twice a month with mates, any other time she is with me anyway. It's just impossible to get her to see how saving sometimes actually ya know, helps us!

I'm not someone who never does anythin. We still go on a couple of holidays a year abroad and go to shows etc, have Sky and little home luxuries like that.

I think we do well considering neither of us are earning loads at the moment. I could understand her moaning if she never got or did anything in her life!