Partners and savings

sp1987

Arg wrote: »

So what you're suggesting is that he backpays her parents all the rent and expenses for the time he was staying there.Why that is a brilliant idea.
I guess it means she won't have to claim benefits and housing for herself.

My suggestion would be that he just supported someone he called a partner, or why bother having one.

If he is so adverse to sharing his life with someone, he could just treat it like business and exchange housing and monetary support for some of his money, yes.

Otherwise that woman's family have essentially been used so he can save a few quid to later live in a house on his own.

andyandflo

sp1987 wrote: »

My suggestion would be that he just supported someone he called a partner, or why bother having one.

If he is so adverse to sharing his life with someone, he could just treat it like business and exchange housing and monetary support for some of his money, yes.

Otherwise that woman's family have essentially been used so he can save a few quid to later live in a house on his own.

In a way a relationship is very much like running a business. To protect one's own wealth, hard decisions have to be taken. But it's the end result that counts - the knowing that between them both they made the decisions for the benefit of their future.

There is a well known saying - a fool and his money are easilly parted!

sp1987

andyandflo wrote: »

In a way a relationship is very much like running a business. To protect one's own wealth, hard decisions have to be taken. But it's the end result that counts - the knowing that between them both they made the decisions for the benefit of their future.

There is a well known saying - a fool and his money are easilly parted!

Good to know you swiftly avoided the pertinent points of my post.

Are you a politician?

Fridge2

My advice to the OP

Do the Authorities know that you are in a co-habiting relationship?

Relationships start and end if you catch my drift;)

Arg

sp1987 wrote: »

My suggestion would be that he just supported someone he called a partner, or why bother having one.

I think your confusing mail order brides and other peoples partners.

tamias

Sage advice, Fridge2, perhaps not fully above board but thanks anyway

Can I firstly just remind the more judgemental amongst you that if I was to pour that £30k of savings into the deposit for our first house together, we would then be officially classed as "poor" due to our low incomes, and entitled to a whole load of benefits? Many people in this country own far more than that as capital in their house and/or have lived by spending everything they earn, and yet are entitled to state help when their income is low. We currently don't even stand a chance of buying our own home despite my best efforts to live a frugal lifestyle so that my (future, when I was younger) partner can benefit. Please bear that in mind before you judge.

And to those such as lady_gaga who presume to know all the ins and outs of our personal situation, including knowing precisely how much time, emotion and money I've already spent voluntarily supporting us both, could you please leave the personal attacks out?

However the point is I really didn't want this to become a debate about the rights/wrongs of the benefits system (I thought this was a forum for practical non-judgmental advice?) so could we please draw it to a close now?

CFC

tamias wrote: »

Caz3121 and dmg24: thanks for clarifying that.

To answer your question, Caz3121, I'm paying nominal rent to her parents currently but my maintenance grant won't cover rent, bills, and living costs for both of us in the new place. We'll be living out of my savings then, it seems, until either we can find her a job, or until my savings have all run out and we've kissed goodbye to the idea of owning our own place together.

I think I feel cheated that I was ever encouraged to save and to 'go without' for now to make a better future. I know plenty of people who have always just spent whatever they earn and are now entitled to full assistance as they have no savings at all. But I digress, as moaning won't actually change anything about our current situation....

Stop whinging. 30k of cash savings is a lot of money, more money than many of the people on this board could ever hope to have, either while they were young enough to be studying still, or ever.

You've lived off her parents and now it seems you are complaining because you can't live off the state.

Either live as a couple with your girlfriend, including supporting her, or live separately. End of story.

Oldernotwiser

andyandflo wrote: »

Don't be so sarcastic! Or is it sour grapes?

That was neither sarcasm not sour grapes. (If it had been sarcasm it would have meant I was agreeing with you!)

Also if you believe that,

"I think the best advice is to stuff the cash in the matteress and say nowt to everybody." isn't encouraging fraud or that 30,000 savings isn't a substantial sum of money at the age of 25, for someone who has only been available for work for a maximum of 3 years, then I really don't know what planet you're from!

alwaysonthego_2

Thread closed!