moral dilemma

Vader123

Tellher to sort it out, or you will be here in a few months when she gets caught or reported saying "How does she get out of this? Its not fair, how many nights can he sleep" etc etc.

Vader

ErisBadb

I wouldn't do anything to report her myself but I would urge her to declare it herself for the following reasons, ( not necessarily in this order ), :

1) - The paranoia isn't good to live with
2) - people mostly end up getting caught out and having to pay the money back at some point and she is committing fraud.:eek:
3) - benefits do not come from the 'government', they come from tax payers so she is cheating on family, friends and neighbours.:mad:
4) - cosmic stuff about creative visulisation ie. she is keeping herself trapped in the benefits by thinking that she cannot do without them. ( Something like that ).:p

lyniced

ErisBadb wrote: »

I wouldn't do anything to report her myself but I would urge her to declare it herself for the following reasons, ( not necessarily in this order ), :

1) - The paranoia isn't good to live with
2) - people mostly end up getting caught out and having to pay the money back at some point and she is committing fraud.:eek:
3) - benefits do not come from the 'government', they come from tax payers so she is cheating on family, friends and neighbours.:mad:
4) - cosmic stuff about creative visulisation ie. she is keeping herself trapped in the benefits by thinking that she cannot do without them. ( Something like that ).:p

Thanks for that - you are spot on. I think I'll have a gently word, then leave it up to her and then my conscience is clear.

Fiddlestick

lyniced wrote: »

I'm torn because I know its wrong, but my friend has had such an awful few years, its so good to see her happy for once. And who knows if this relationship will last?

Well if the relationship doesn't last then she can start a new claim, can't she?

cheza1982

for gods sake people i dont believe in fiddling but this is your friend why would it even go through your head to report her, if she gets caught she gets caught she knows the risks, coming on here asking wat you should do to your friends, whats more important your friendship or the government losing some money that if they had would just be wasted on something else, is your life affected, no so get over it

Vader123

cheza1982 wrote: »

whats more important your friendship or the government losing some money that if they had would just be wasted on something else, is your life affected, no so get over it

the government does not have any "money". All the money it has is earned from everyone else, when you work, pay for goods, services etc, so she is stealing from everyone.

And as for the friendship thing, I would question her devotion to it. She did not think of your friendship when she put you in your awkward position!

She will get found out eventually. A like minded person (single parent on benefits etc) will look at her with her benefits, nice fella, always there and get jealous.

Tell her to come clean or shop her in. If not for her sake but the sake of everyone else in the country she is defrauding.

Vader

katiesmummy

Maybe speak to your friend, tell her that she needs to do something- either declare that her boyfriend/partner is more or less living with her or she needs to stop letting him stay with her.

Give her opportunity to sort it out- sometimes it takes someone else's input to make you realize that what you are doing is wrong.

Duncombe

I agree with bestpud.

If she has had such a hard time over the last few years (although a divorce is sadly something 50% of the population also go through and the majority dont make up for it by committing benefit fraud), she won't want her life to be made any harder if she is caught.

I can fully understand the temptations of her not wanting to 'rock' her seemingly happy boat, but like others have said...it's only a matter of time before others find out about the living arrangments and report her.

toontron

There is absolutely no way that if this was a friend of mine I would even consider shopping her for one moment.

KimYeovil

Straight in with Godwin before it is diverted to discussion:

If your friend was a !!!!!phile or a nazi would you still keep quiet?