moral dilemma

DX2

cheza1982 wrote: »

for gods sake people i dont believe in fiddling but this is your friend why would it even go through your head to report her, if she gets caught she gets caught she knows the risks, coming on here asking wat you should do to your friends, whats more important your friendship or the government losing some money that if they had would just be wasted on something else, is your life affected, no so get over it

As long as it doesn't affect you personally people are happy to turn the other cheek!

Drink driver doesn't affect me, but I would still report it.
Child abuse doesn't affect me, but I would still report it.
See where I am going with your lack of morals?

Benefit cheats are thieves simple as that.

lyniced

I didn't anticipate such a strong reaction - it seems to me that its one side or the other and percentage-wise its probably 60% to 'dob her in'. On balance I have decide to gently chat to her about this, but leave it to her to make her own decision - that way my conscience is clean.

millym

No way would I ever grass on a friend for something like this. You have to talk to her and tell her that it's time she declared that her BF is living with her. Many people must find themselves in this situation with a new relationship, and I can see why they would want to keep everything separate at the beginning.

Some people may not feel ready to commit for quite a while, especially the newly divorced. I do feel however, that if the BF is spending the majority of his time there then he should be contributing financially, and this should be declared.

You could point out to your friend that it is only a matter of time before they get caught, and better that she informs the authorities than someone else does.

People like your friend don't usually set out to be benefit cheats, but her confiding in you shows that she knows it's got to the point where what she is doing is wrong.

[Deleted User]

Vader123 wrote: »

the government does not have any "money". All the money it has is earned from everyone else, when you work, pay for goods, services etc, so she is stealing from everyone.

And as for the friendship thing, I would question her devotion to it. She did not think of your friendship when she put you in your awkward position!

She will get found out eventually. A like minded person (single parent on benefits etc) will look at her with her benefits, nice fella, always there and get jealous.

Tell her to come clean or shop her in. If not for her sake but the sake of everyone else in the country she is defrauding.

Vader

Actually the govt does have money,did it escape your notice that they printed £200 BILLION of the stuff to rescue their mates the bankers?

laurel7172

Somebody will report her. Somebody will assume she hasn't informed the relevant people, whether she has or not, and inform on her, whether they know or not.

She really needs to get in first.

lyniced

laurel7172 wrote: »

Somebody will report her. Somebody will assume she hasn't informed the relevant people, whether she has or not, and inform on her, whether they know or not.

She really needs to get in first.

Well this is what I thought too. You can't live like this forever without anyone knowing. I now know that her ex-husband has got wind of the situation and if anyone would 'shop' her, he would. She would be totally devastated to get done for fraud, so maye you are right that she goes to the authorities before anyone else.

Vader123

woodbine wrote: »

Actually the govt does have money,did it escape your notice that they printed £200 BILLION of the stuff to rescue their mates the bankers?

No, the money they used was tax-payers money.

Vader

FOURCANDLES_2

I would just tell her to now mention it for her own sake or she could get prosecuted that is if she is abusing the rules. she would possibly only lose HB/INCOME SUPPORT if he has moved in jointly they should be ok anyway as he can contribute, cruel thing to say but if he is paying for his children her ex is paying for his children she would be back as it was before divorce wife hubby and children.

lyniced

FOURCANDLES wrote: »

I would just tell her to now mention it for her own sake or she could get prosecuted that is if she is abusing the rules. she would possibly only lose HB/INCOME SUPPORT if he has moved in jointly they should be ok anyway as he can contribute, cruel thing to say but if he is paying for his children her ex is paying for his children she would be back as it was before divorce wife hubby and children.

Yes, that is true - oh what a tangled web we weave!

Casiopeia_2

I'd tell her to sort it out too. Any good friend would tell her to, as she could be in a lot of trouble if she is caught.