Talk me into it?

LeeSouthEast

Ok. I'll start from the beginning..

Overview: Now 27 years old. Wife left Dec 2008. I moved back in with parents. Paid off nearly £20k of debt. Got divorced in the process. Found a new girlfriend. Lived happy for 6 months. That went a bit pearshaped through no fault of either of us, and we remain great friends, and just got back from a holiday of a lifetime together. But will be moving "on my own" and not together. Couple of grand in emergency fund. Couple of grand in a "moving out" fund. No debt.

In a fairly safe job (as things go these days anyway!), and want to move out of my parents house - because as much as I love them, they're driving me NUTS.

I currently live 35 miles from where I work resulting in a 70 mile round trip commute every work day. I can (but don't want to) afford to live where I work, so have found some properties for rent about 5-10 miles away from work that I really like. As a bonus they're also much much nearer said girl 'friend'.

Approx £800/mo rent (one is £775, the other is on the dot £800). Quiet areas, stunning views, purpose built 2-bedroom flats, allocated parking, gorgeous internals etc. etc.

I've worked out that all my outgoings, including fun, frolicks, food, bills, rent etc would come to £1250/mo, leaving me with at least £650-700 each month and that assumes no overtime, which in reality only happens on average one month out of 12!

So why can't I bring myself to be enthusiastic about doing this? I want to do it... but ??? Help!!

Svenena

Only you can answer that. What's putting you off? Maybe you don't want to live by yourself? Maybe you realise that's an awful lot to pay for rent - are you in London?

If you don't feel enthusiastic about it, don't do it. You'll regret it when you're stuck there for at least 6 months. Why not wait and see what happens in your life in the next couple of months (sounds like you've had a lot of changes recently) and then see how you feel.

Raggs_2

How much are you saving at the moment? Because if you can pay off 20000 in debt in 11 months, if you can suffer your parents for another year, you could in theory have a 20k deposit, and look at buying your own place? Probably more, since I'm sure the 20k debt had some interest going on too...

Not exactly the talking you wanted I'm sure, but perhaps something to consider?

Cannon_Fodder

Raggs wrote: »

How much are you saving at the moment? Because if you can pay off 20000 in debt in 11 months, if you can suffer your parents for another year, you could in theory have a 20k deposit, and look at buying your own place? Probably more, since I'm sure the 20k debt had some interest going on too...

Not exactly the talking you wanted I'm sure, but perhaps something to consider?

Ditto......

LeeSouthEast

What is putting me off is not having 'enough' in my emergency fund. But will I ever be content there? That's more of an excuse to remain with parents than anything.

Do I want to live alone? I'm torn there, but at the same time I won't be single forever (or at least I hope not!), so maybe that is a shor-term concern. I'd quite like to be independant again and this would move me closer to a lot of my friends as well.

I'm not in London, but still in one of the expensive areas of the south east (in case you hadn't guessed!). I've been "waiting and seeing" for the last year really, and to be honest, life continues to happen around me. I don't think "waiting and seeing" will produce any results of note. The properties I'm in love with are not available until September anyway, so there is a somewhat forced 'wait' in there anyway.

I don't know quite what I'm aiming to get out of this thread... a bit of confidence to just "get on with it" I guess?

LeeSouthEast

A 20k deposit is nothing around here. I worked out last year with my mortgage advisor that to get a decent rate on a decent amount, my deposit would need to be at least £45,000. This would be at least 2 more years with the parents, and I just cannot stomach that.

Catblue

Get a mate to rent with you on a 2 bed flat near work?

Will halve the rent for you and would make your utilities a bit cheaper.

You only have to commit to 6 months for the tenancy and that'll be long enough to find out if sharing works for you or not. It is not a huge commitment at all and could be a great stepping stone for you.

Remember that your commuting costs will come right down if you get a place near your current job.

Raggs_2

OK. Well, in terms of relationships, you aren't going to want to get a place together for at least 6 months I would have thought, so no point in even considering that as part of the plans.

Place for yourself, at the moment you are looking at expensive places (you said yourself how nice they are), any chance of looking at something a bit less extravagant? Maybe you'd feel better if you had more savings coming in each month?

As for decent rate on a decent amount, 45k may do it, but would 22k or there abouts get you to 10-15% on a modest place? Because once you're in, you could then overpay to get yourself to the good deals in a couple of years time, which would be similar, if not faster, than renting and saving... Worth a look I'm sure.

Basically I'm suggesting looking for something more modest, so that you can feel more secure.

Do you really need 2 bedrooms? I know most 1 bedrooms feel small, but would you use a 2nd bedroom for anything but storage? If not, save a bit of cash, and then if the situation arises you need a second bedroom (going to be a while in theory), you can relocate then.

LeeSouthEast

Nope, I don't need 2 bedrooms, actually. It's a "nice to have". I can amend my search appropriately, but it's a bit of a shame when you've fallen in love with a place to begin with!

A flat-share is a possibility with a friend. He has half-arranged it already.. but I'm even less convinced I want to go that route... aaaagh lol

Raggs_2

Flat shares can cause a lot of issues, but can be a lot of fun too. Depends on your personalities and social lives. If they coincide, great, if not, hell.

You say you've fallen in love, but you wouldn't be here if you weren't sure. Take a look at the one bedroom options, maybe you'll fall in love again.

giddypenguin

I think you sound like me, I am a chronic worrier, and am known to over-analyse everything to death - to the point where I am truely awful at making any sort of decision - I get in a right tiz, stress my self out for weeks, then just say f*** it and usually end up going with my first thoughts/instinct!

If you are like me, then I would say, if you have the money to go for it, then do it! If you can't stand it/cope/don't like it then in 6 months don't re-new and go back home and save up for that deposit! 6 months out of your life is nothing! You never know, might be the best thing you did and you just needed the little push to do it.