It's STILL tough and not getting better - so how are we coping?

kezlou

Regarding parenting, i was a teenage mother who couldn't cook, my sig nature dish micro chips and pot noodle. . Yes i was that bad.
Now almost everything we eat is home cooked and made.
Parenting in modern times is hard, as now we know more of the dangers i,e !!!!!philes, children are taught earlier about this, which makes them scared to leave the house. In schools cookery or basic life skills are not taught. Its not surprisingly most people don't know how to be parents. I'm still learning now and my eldest is 10 years old!

One of my friends recently said to me and my OH we are the most unconventional parents he knows. Do you know why? Because we don't buy into all the fads, we make our own furniture, we teach the chidren how to cook, make/mend and grow our veg in pots. We also encourage our children to go and explore the outside world.

Right now as we speak my OH is teaching my eldest how to descend down our front door. Our eldest is on about becoming a rigger, we have all the safety equipment, so we thought why not. In the next couple of weeks if the weather improves they'll both go caving.

Praying tax credits come early as we are now officially on the last of the bread, plain and self raising flour, its quite scary. This coming from the woman who always has at least two bags of each in the cupboard. But we have plenty in the freezer etc so its all good.

kidcat

Have just worked out our gas and electricity bill from last bill to now, and am relieved, its half what it was at this point last year, have then worked out worst case scenario with heating usage and even if we start using the heating as much as we did last year (and that was loads) we will still not be in debit with our bills. Thankfully we are in a fixed price deal so if prices rise this winter our bills cant go up. Its such a relief to be in a position of knowing that all my efforts have paid off and that I have reduced our consumption so dramatically.
Have been have a look through the winter preparations thread - nowhere near finished it- and have decided to drag myself to Ikea tomorrow to buy some cheap fleeces and begin lining the curtains with them, assuming DD is well enough for an outing. May treat us to a cheapie brekkie while we are there too,:)

Kitcaboodle

The whole tax credits thing scares me! It's done on previous tax year and DH and I started our jobs part way through the tax year. My earnings last tax year should be roughly the same as this year because my money will stop when my maternity pay ends but, if I notify them when it ends (as I believe I have to) then they might up the credits and leave me having to pay them back at the end of the tax year as DH will earn more this year than last (unless he's made redundant which is looking more and more likely).

I'm so worried about over-payments that I'm going to put everything they give me in a separate account and run a year in areers unless we're desperate for the cash. I've heard too many horror stories about them suddenly wanting back thousands of pounds to feel comfortable about spending the cash until they confirm they've paid us the right amounts!

greent

We ended up having to pay back tax credits a few years ago - only about £500, but we were skint. I then just didn't bother claiming for a few years because the forms were so much hassle for the possibility of having to pay it back. And then there was a couple of years where we weren't entitled. We've claimed this year but it was a right job to do so. DH was made redundant l;ast year and his earnings include the decent redundancy sum - so his earnings were massively inflated. He's now self employed and expecting to earn about way under the threshold - so we claimed, but they've kept half of it back just in case his earnings are more... It's not a very good system, imo....

kezlou

I had overpayments from tax credits, one time its was £2500. But i have never had to pay it back al;l at once. All i did was phone them up and explained that i couldn't afford to pay it. Ended up paying them back £20 a month.
Thing is with the credit system its continuously worked out and the total changed.So the original figure of £2500 got to £1500 then down £500.

I personally wouldn't worry about it for now, by all means separate the money (if you can) but try not to stress yourself out about it.

Today i'm finishing my curtains, the cold is well and truly seeping and its a whopping 4 degrees outside. Can you feel the heat?!

sammy_kaye18

Morning all

well feeling slight sense of relief today. Managed to reshuffle all my bills and will only have one that's not paid - the dreaded ntl bill but have been discussing moving to sky which instead of our normal £65 for phone/tv/internet - it will cost us £35 instead and I barely use the house phone - its more of a money saver for relatives to get hold of us so its all sorted and will fingers crossed ring and rearrange it all this week or next at some point.

Holly had a bad nights sleep = this cold just will not shift! :mad:

CERIDWEN - In her photo she was lit by Television light whilst I was playign with her on the floor and when you ask her to smile she goes all sheepish -- dont let the cute picture fool you though -- although shes not one to cry her heart out --- she will if shes awake in her cot and your not OR your not paying her attention, she will shout at the top of her lungs and scare the daylights out of you at 2am! .

Was asking Ben about his christmas list last night too and my son (hes 6) asked me if he can adopt a giraffe.:think::think::think::think: he is a soft natured little boy and has decided he wants to be a zoo keeper and look after the animals. so going to see if I can find an offer in the zoo that's local to my nan, and see how much adopting one there will cost ( note - a children's adoption is £25) and he gets a free ticket to visit 'his' giraffe. Plus it gives me a good reason to go and visit my grandmother too. Would love to get him a zoo keeper day but think he is still a little bit too young yet as most start at 8/9 years old.

Owen told me off last night as well, we were watching 'Rhys to the Rescue' last night (for those who don't know he rescues reptiles in south Wales and is qualified to handle specialised reptiles too - he helps the police on such call outs) anyway there was a lizard on it that had ben attacked badly by its housing partner and as a result had lost toes/part of its foot and only had one claw left. Owen sat upright with the remote ready to change the channel, (lizard looked fine though and all his wounds were healed mind) and Ben asked me what was wrong with the lizard and I replied 'the other lizard he lived with was nasty to him, and he has lost some of his toes' and pointed out he only had one claw left. Owen told me off becasue apparently Ben doesn't need to know that and 'why did i think he was sat ready with the remote to turn over?' :mad: I don't see a problem with explaining that to Ben. If it was particularly gorey or disturbing then yes fine I would turn over, but the lizard looked fine albeit slightly subdued. I don't think I was in the wrong.

We both have very different up brings though - so although that is fine for me to watch/see/say -- Owen gets disturbed by things like that. He would rather shelter Ben and not have him know about things like that/death/etc just yet.......whereas I have a sneaky suspicion that Ben is already taking after mummy because when we were walking to school a few months back a funeral procession passed us and he asked about it so I explained it as best I could to a 6 year old.

Anyway - weather is looking so so today. Have to go and pay most of my bills and think my SIL and MIL are dragging me out to a local poundstretcher this morning on too.

BB1984

Morning All, it's very nippy down south too today! Haven't ventured out yet (starting work late today) but according to the internet the current temperature here is 4 degrees.....brrrrrr! Not used to that down on the South Coast Riviera....!!

I'm going to be out and about all day, so hopefully it'll warm up. I just went to fill up my thermos flask with hot tea for later, only to discover it's all manky inside Need to find out the best way to give it a good clean.

Sammykaye - for what it's worth, I don't think you were wrong to explain that stuff to Ben, I think it's a good thing that you're not over-protecting him! You know him well enough to judge whether something will upset him, so I wouldn't worry. When I was his age I used to love nature - even the horrible/gory bits(!) - and used to ask my parents about stuff like that all the time. Never did me any harm....!

Going to a wedding reception on Sat night and I really can't be bothered to go! I know that's an awful thing to say, but I don't know the couple that well (went to uni with them but only very loosely kept in touch - was surprised to be invited TBH), and it's a good 2+ hour drive away. I've got loads of work I need to do on Sat (and Sun), and don't fancy the idea of driving in the dark (horrible route as well) all that way for 8pm, then driving all the way home again at midnight. But we've said we'll go, so obviously we have to! Never mind.

Right, I'm off shortly so better go. Hope you all have a nice day and keep warm!

BB

seasalt_2

I'm with you sammy. I think it's always better to tell the truth to children if they ask and within the limits of their understanding. My OH is the same as yours though - DD1 once had a pet (bottle fed) lamb that we found dead one morning - a sheep by then and back with the rest - OH was all for putting her mark on another sheep so that DD wouldn't know - but I wouldn't let him. And if it was a wildlife prog on TV, he'd be changing the channel for himself if there were any gory/distressing bits.

Cold here too this morning - ice on the road!!

mardatha

Two degrees and freezing mist early on here. But I wasn't around, the OH told me

kidcat

Thick mist here too, have had heating on for three hours and its still only 18c in the living room, goodness knows what the bedrooms are, have woken up with stinking cold again, and finding it very difficult to move, took kids to school then home to attempt to deal with the wet washing,

Have made a list of winter prep stuff and another of tough times stuff - and rememebered to include stuff like cat litter and hay for the bunny. Also finally got around to digging out the old house phone which isnt cordless and checking it still works, I figure if the electric goes awol at least I can still make calls etc.