When to report bad parenting?

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

jillyjacks wrote: »

they wont want to know your name at all much less your address....as I said earlier, you can make an annonymous referral and it will be investigated in exactly the same way as a one where the person leaves their name

Nope. Not down here. Too many malicious people, I guess.

and if there is something wrong, surely you should have the courage of your convictions to stand up for a child.

sephrenia

Normally I wouldn't comment on a post like this but I have to say, if the woman lives a few doors down and you can still hear the kids being given a crack for not getting in when they've been yelled at, then you should be on the phone already, not online wondering about it.

I knew someone once, a long time ago, who used to screech at their kids even in front of people and while I used to cringe a bit for the kids being embarrassed that way, I didn't say anything. I wish I had though as one of those kids ended up in hospital with broken bones and the other was found to be severely malnourished. Thankfully the kids were removed from her care.

If I'd spoken up sooner rather than be embarrassed, that kid wouldn't have gone through the pain of broken bones and the other would have had something to eat. That's something I'll have to live with, trust me, you don't want to have to live with it too.

bestpud

Is it the smacking you are concerned about?

Unfortunately many parents shout - heck I do myself sometimes!

Most of us don't shout all the time but some do and I think it matters more what she is shouting and how tbh.

Better an ok parent who has no volume control than a quiet one who systematically undermines their child behind closed doors imo.

If you do report, do leave your details - if you are that concerned, you should not be afraid to say who you are.

And, as said, quit with the references to housing benefit and chavs (like that is relevent...!) as it will undermine your credibility.

nottslass_2

jillyjacks wrote: »

the original post said "4 or 5 audible blows" to me thats not acceptable...and if half the country was doing that to their children then I would be glad if social services were to visit every one of them

Personally I don't think its ever acceptable to smack a child but.......

The original post says that the woman lives "several doors down" how on earth can the OP be sure that what they actually heard was indeed "4 or 5 Audible blows".

It is not (unfortunately) against the law to smack a child,there are no other indications that the children are being abused in any way.

I would be a complete waste of resources if Social services wasted time investigating people on the basis that somebody several doors away "may of heard something" (that wasn't illegal anyway) especially if there were no other concerns that they children were at risk from abuse.

jillyjacks

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Nope. Not down here. Too many malicious people, I guess.

and if there is something wrong, surely you should have the courage of your convictions to stand up for a child.

I agree .....and I would leave my name, but if you have to live next door to them and they know it was you who reported them....especially if it turns out to be not proven, then I can see why some people prefer to stay annonymous...thats why the system is set up that way.....I am surprised you HAVE to leave a name in your area, i thought it was a national thing where you could remain annonymous??

jillyjacks

nottslass wrote: »

Personally I don't think its ever acceptable to smack a child but.......

The original post says that the woman lives "several doors down" how on earth can the OP be sure that what they actually heard was indeed "4 or 5 Audible blows".

It is not (unfortunately) against the law to smack a child,there are no other indications that the children are being abused in any way.

I would be a complete waste of resources if Social services wasted time investigating people on the basis that somebody several doors away "may of heard something" (that wasn't illegal anyway) especially if there were no other concerns that they children were at risk from abuse.

It is if it leaves a mark

http://www.haywards-solicitors.co.uk/newsletters/summer05/smacking.htm

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

jillyjacks wrote: »

I agree .....and I would leave my name, but if you have to live next door to them and they know it was you who reported them....especially if it turns out to be not proven, then I can see why some people prefer to stay annonymous...thats why the system is set up that way.....I am surprised you HAVE to leave a name in your area, i thought it was a national thing where you could remain annonymous??

I imagine they don't go in and say 'Mrs Jillyjacks next door says.....', but otherwise, they'd be inundated with malicious hoaxes, spiteful exes and general busibodies who resent someone getting benefits. I can see it being very effective in weeding out the vicious ones.

Mind you, Crimestoppers claims to be anonymous, but if they refer a person onto the investigation team of a particular area (eg, 'we don't deal with it, you'll have to call the incident room'), it's never anonymous.

Just like the Inland Revenue fraud line.

jillyjacks

this provides some useful info
http://www.childrenslegalcentre.com/OneStopCMS/Core/CrawlerResourceServer.aspx?resource=144F659C-6DD7-4DE2-A88E-0A33CBB9C2F5&mode=link&guid=06e9daf0935b4e2b986791d3372ed5b0

and it also states that a person can remain annonymous...Jojo...your social services dept need reminding of their duty of care

jillyjacks

the link above refers to the children act 1989 there was a new Act( 2004) but most of it remains the same in the case of reporting child abuse

PasturesNew

jellyhead wrote: »

If she is struggling to cope then perhaps she'll be offered parenting classes to help her play and bond with her children, or some other form of help. You might be doing her a favour.

Where she'll be taught how to cook so the ash doesn't fall into their pot noodle ... how to smack them without leaving marks ... and how high to keep her fags/lighter/stella so the brats don't nick them.

At least, that's all she'll remember.