Flat mate taking the P...

Fire_Fox

Lish wrote: »

I feel I will have to bite the bullett and approach her tonight but I dont know how to broach these things- especially the drugs thing as I have no 100% proof of it (and she knows it). What do you all suggest?

Do not approach her until you have your room secured. Quite honestly the bedding is the least of your worries, I don't agree with RAS at all on that - you are too vulnerable with your belongings and your cat to start house wars over trifling matters.

Milliewilly

Lish wrote: »

Hiya
I wondered if anyone could offer me some advice?

Came home from holiday only to find my flate 'mate' has allowed friends of hers to stay in my room whilst I was away. I am absoloutely mortified and feel like my privacy has been completely and utterly violated. :mad:

This is following on from her locking my 'indoor' cat outside on the balcony (5 stories up in the middle of a busy shopping area) whilst I was out for the evening (obv I came home earlier than she expected and I caught her out) and has been using/abusing all of my posessions (staining my sofa and breaking glasses and ruining my £40 frying pan to mention a few!).

More worryingly she has now taken to bringing groups of people home 2-3 times a week at 4am and doing drugs in my flat (I havent caught them red handed but it doesnt take a genious to work out what people are doing in her bathroom when they come out sniffing like they have a bad cold).
She often passess out on her bed with all the lights on and doors open- including the front door to the apartment and is so out of it she doesnt hear her mates ringing the intercom for up to an hour at a time wanting to come in at 3-4am!!!

Since I came home, there is now also a major leak in my ensuite into my bedroom that was not there when I left to go on holiday- she has denied everything and has avoided me ever since yesterday....

We moved in together at the begining of March and all of the above has happened in this short space of time- please could anyone offer some helpful advice on what the hell to do?!?

I consider myself a reasonable human being and I really dont mind the odd thing happening from time to time as I'm not uptight but this is really getting me down and feel totally abused in my own home. I dread going home at night after work.....:(

The flat was unfurnished when we moved in and ALL of the furniture and utensils are mine apart from her bed which she brought with her.

ANY USEFUL ADVICE ON WHAT TO DO WOULD BE REALLY HELPFUL, I AM AT MY WITTS' END. (my contract is up at 6 months and I obviously will be legging it out of there, but in the meantime?...)

Thanks, from a very desperate MSE member!

I had this problem when I was a student - I had a 6th floor flat. To my ABSOLUTE HORROR the caretaker knocked on the door with my cat. My flatmate had left the baclony door open and she (cat) had JUMPED accross to the neighbours balcony and into their flat :mad:.

Mischa8

To be honest with you, you're stuck there with someone you don't want to be with and it sounds like as you've mostly lived with boyfriends/by yourself before then it can be quite hard if you do share, especially with a fellow female.

The letting someone stay in your room is totally out of order, I'd get a lock. The drugs and people coming round, same thing.

You *could* put all your concerns in writing to the LL and LA - especially re damage to your furniture and the drug use. I'm sure they could find *some* proof of her doing drugs, does her dealer come round, or does she deal etc? a friend of mine once had this problem - 3 girls sharing a flat, 1 girl attacked the other and generally bad feeling, landlord got so fed up he evicted the 2 trouble makers and left the *good* tenant there. there had been complaints on both sides (not the good tenants) but to the landlord, separately.

I'd be careful about approaching her, she could do anything to you, especially with drugs involved. I'd secure your room like I said before. I also think mediation is highly unlikely to work in your case, with her.

To me, paying £175 to amend the TA and get someone new in (flatmate) would be a small price to pay to get this nasty tenant out.

I'd also take G_M's no. 2 advice, hopefully LL/LA will be sympathetic and not chase you for the rent.

PS - I also take it that cats are allowed to be in the flat?

missile

Oh........ the joys of a shared tennancy!

I would put a lock on my door.

I am very surprised Agent/LL lets you keep a cat, do they know? I would not be too happy to share with an animal. Flatmate locked it on the balcony now. If you start complaining, next time it might be over the balcony

AbbieCadabra

s'truth! complete nightmare for you . sorry i don't have any words of wisdom - apart from tread carefully, (which is so bloomin wrong as you're the reasonable one! but where drugs are in use, you just never know how someone is going to react) & i hope you get it sorted out without too much hassle.

can i please be at the front of the Q to be locking your flatmate out on the balcony for a few hours, the satisfaction would be great!

keep us posted

DVardysShadow

Fire_Fox wrote: »

Next time there are people doing drugs in the flat, tell them calmly to their faces that they either leave or explain their actions to the police. Possession of a Class A is an offence and they will well know it.

Dangerous. I would not go there. I do not know what to suggest, but I feelt hat OP could easily be stitched up for possession out of this. The police will not care if they think they can claim a scalp.

Fire_Fox

DVardysShadow wrote: »

Dangerous. I would not go there. I do not know what to suggest, but I feelt hat OP could easily be stitched up for possession out of this. The police will not care if they think they can claim a scalp.

That is why the OP must keep their room locked at all times and why they should give their name when reporting to the police and not an anonymous tip off. I have lived in the same property as a couple of small time dealers, and I have had friends who were done for possession or intent to supply. She is at risk doing nothing, they could get raided if there are comings and goings at all hours. There is no way of knowing whether any of the guests are known to the police and will flag the property. The police do care as small time dealers can lead them to big time dealers, even the OPs phone won't have any dodgy numbers in.

Owain_Moneysaver

[STRIKE]Wait until flatmate is comatose on drugs then chuck her off balcony. Take care not to leave thumb-prints on ankles.[/STRIKE]

Sorry, forget I wrote that. But it's nice to dream sometimes.

Could you complain to your landlord that your landlord has introduced you to a completely unsatisfactory co-tenant and it's your landlord's responsibility to get her out and replace her with a suitable one.

Certainly lock up your credit cards etc, and could you find someone to look after puss till things are sorted out.

PasturesNew

Fire_Fox wrote: »

http://www.festival.bournemouth.ac.uk/pdf/unilock.pdf
http://www.howsarlock.com/
http://www.lifelock.co.uk/
http://www.dooranchor.com/

A passing quick observation... the first one is a lock for the door when you go out, but the remaining three seem to be something you put on your door when you're in your room, to prevent people coming in when you're in.

Thought I'd point that out so anybody can inspect the links with that in mind before choosing a solution.

AbbieCadabra

i hope the OP is OK & decided not to 'confront' her flatmate last night, would be nice to hear from you today!

after reading thru this again, i really think it's a 1-2-1 at the LA asap to get them up to speed with what's happening &/or seeking advice from the police (this might seem a little extreme at this stage, but, if things do kick-off now the OP is trying to get things sorted, at least the police would have a note of the concerns raised - or is that just too idealistic & not what happens IRL?).