How do you cope with 2 kids under 3?

meritaten

its easier than you think!!! I can remember thinking when pregnant with 2nd child 'oh my gawd, I am hardly coping now - how will I cope with two babies under three'. the answer is..........you do! your first baby becomes - not a baby but a child and the baby is - a lot less hassle than the first because you have experience, you learn to delegate, you dont fret over maintaining standards and you CERTAINLY dont change the babies clothes a dozen times a day hoping that you will get your wear out of all the lovely baby gifts!
for your own sanity hun, you learn to ignore some untidiness, accept those offers of help (especially babysitting ones), appreciate meals you havent had to cook, dont iron things no-one sees, wear clothes more than once without washing them, teach NO1 child to run errands for you, teach the dog to fetch disposable nappies, vacuum only when the carpet grows its own coat, wash the kitchen floor when your slippers stick to it............get the idea?
that was all in fun...........(well, some of it) hun, you will cope, millions of women do. its the ones who have unrealistic expectations of maintaining perfection who get stressed and come unstuck.
just enjoy NO1 child and the new baby and let your OH help any way he wants to!

Bitsy_Beans

Once baby arrives you're find a routine that suits you all. My DS was a couple of months shy of 3 years when DD arrived. Looking back it was really no extra trouble at all, especially when they are newborns and sleep so much.
As everyone has said accept any offers of help, tell people IF you are struggling (people aren't mind readers ) and most of all you won't be a domestic goddess in the interim. But that really doesn't matter, your kids won't grow up thinking I wish mum had done a bit more cleaning and a little less mothering. If for your own sanity (being at home everyday I can appreciate this) you need to clean etc then rather than trying to do it all in one go how about doing one room a day. Even if you dust for 5 mins it's going to be better than nothing. Of course I am suggesting you do this once you are feeling up to it, definately not as soon as you are home after birth

Counting_Pennies_2

My advice is to let things go.

That is in terms of standards and activities.

Prioritise, make sure you get the washing out of the machine and as crease free as possible, so you can then avoid lots of ironing. (I remember despairing at having to rewash so many items, I just didn't get round to getting it out of the machine.)

One big thing I learnt was anything that doesn't need ironing gets put on airers on the landing upstairs, then when dry they instantly go into drawers and not in a pile downstairs. Then you just have a few bits of laundry downstairs.

Washing and dishwasher are key, and then managing to get some form of food on the table. Pasta, and ready meals are life savers, as are jacket potatoes! Lower your standards on regular meals from scratch, maybe one night a week, if energy allows!

Activities, make sure you just have one activity to go to a day, even if that is the supermarket. I ended up having two days a week that the activity out would be a trip to the supermarket/post office, etc. The other three week days would be trips out to play groups, meeting friends etc. The rest of the day make sure you have activities to keep the toddler amused, so you don't exhaust yourself getting out of the house, that took so much energy to do.

When baby has a sleep, make sure one of those your toddler has a good bit of tv watching, and say mummy is going to lie down and have a rest while you watch your tv. That way you will be able to regroup on your energy while still being in the room with your toddler.

I also used to take the phone out of the wall, so it didn't ring when I needed to give the children attention, or they were sleeping. I always found the phone such an intrusion and that was when behaviour slipped.

Also one last thing, try to get your supermarket shops done on line, and just pop out for a few extras in the week. It is so much easier to get it delivered when your OH is at home, and you can share looking out for the children and unpacking.

Good luck

sooz

ukjoel wrote: »

dirty.

Seriously though one is tough, second one seems like second nature.
Will let you know in a months time what I think of three.

The second one is easy. With the third you realise you have run out of hands. Nature really should let mums grow an extra arm for each extra child after the first 2.

bertiebots

The best bit of advice I can give is relax, dont worry about being superwoman and make sure that before your bundle arrives that your oh knows how to use the washer!
I had 3 babys in 4 years and by no. 3 I just went with the flow. I was far more confident after my first baby and by the 3rd even the hv didnt bother coming round after the birth because she knew I knew what I was doing. It all falls into place.
Great advice from others too is to involve your toddler, they dont really understand another baby is coming (doesnt matter if you explain or not) until they see it -so get them to fetch things for you, praise them for the help and have lots of cuddles all together at feeding time etc. This will help them get used to their new sibling an a positive way .
Get your freezer stocked up with easy meals (check out the os board for insparation) and deligate jobs to oh and accept any help offered!.
Dont forget the wonderful web...do your shopping on line in the first few weeks after the baby arrives so you dont have the hastle!

creased-leach

1) Get used to the mess. It's here for a while.
2) Enjoy them. They grow fast.

sindygirl58

Good Greif!! you lot are amazing, dunnohow any of you do it!! Sounds like compltete madness a treadmill of babies..

esmf73

Baby Gates - My two children (17 months apart) had baby gates on the doors of their bedrooms. This meant that I could put baby down in his cot for a sleep, knowing that even if number 1 child beat his own baby gate, by the time he'd beaten the second baby gate I'd be up there.

Also when baby slept in the afternoon, number 1 child was in his room (inevitably it was trashed, but easy to put mattress back on cot bed!) and I slept. This only backfired on me once, when I'd left the fire burning downstairs. Thank goodness for smoke alarms! No damage and I learnt never to fall asleep unless the house is locked, my dogs were on their beds, and the phone was off the hook - needless to say we rarely used the fire after that!

jrjakn118

Lalaladybird wrote: »

How do you get anything done beyond looking after a baby and entertaining a toddler? I'm going to have to cook, clean and do the laundry but just cannot imagine how I'll fit any of that in knowing how hard it was with a newborn and how hard it can be with a toddler constantly demanding this and that. My OH is great but as he works full time and I get to be a sahm I think it's only fair I do the lion's share at home but am so worried I'll drown.

When I was giving birth with my second child, my eldest is 2 weeks before turning to 2 y.o. At first, I was worried that I can't cope with taking care of the them, having to do all the chores at home, and taking care of myself as well. But things run smoothly when the baby is born. My first child has become more responsible that I can't imagine. She would help me do simple things like getting things for baby at the room, etc. When the baby would fall asleep, I would do the laundry or do other chores. You can do things easier when the baby is asleep. Don't you worry too much, it will get you stressed up and frustrate more. Do things out of a positive thought and everything will put back into place. And also, prayer helps a lot in asking for guidance and strength.

clairec79

I had 3 in 3 years (eldest was 3yr 1 month when the third was born) you just get on and do it.

You are (in general) far more laid back with your second (or more) child, and they fit around your life, you learn that if they cry for 15 seconds while you stop the elder child from wetting themselves it's not the end of the world.

The baby is entertained by watching the elder child play