Community Service......help please!

[Deleted User]

Actually Jo I agree with u, I'm familiar with the suicide stuff myself. My OH wasn't a regular drinker at all but it is emotional abuse. I learned to call an ambulance and stay til it turned up (we weren't living together then)., being very unemotional, making no promises whatsoever. It did stop because it wasn't being rewarded. I've since told him if he does it again, I won't do anything at all.If he starts the 'pity me' routine, just say 'that's emotional blackmail and I'm not listening to it' .., continue the conversation as long as he doesn't try the same routine at all. It did help my OH learn to stop this. Its not easy because I still occasionally get dragged in but it does help. I realise at the moment u are not speaking to him at all because he hasn't gone into rehab., but put this in the thread as something to consider if the situation changes.

far2812

Thanks all - you were so right so far - all the voicemail message of suicide, then "going away" for good, then missing me, then wanting help, then telling me to ***k off and that he hates me etc etc. I don't do myself any favours by listening to them but to be honest i am a bit numb with it all at the moment,

I will use the route of "I am not listening to emotional blackmail" - I will try that one!

The thing is that he forgets everything - so he will call when sober and assumes everything is ok and that I havent heard from him for a while.

He doesnt know where I am staying at the moment which is brilliant!