Cats - trusted person

tabskitten

My puppy was given to me by a ''complete stranger'' I have loved her and looked after her and am so so thankful that this particular dog is in my life and know that had the ''complete stranger'' not trusted me that I would not have her now........

Sometimes you have to give a bit of trust.

Sometimes you don't - i think that gut instinct usually tells you if something is ok or not.

Debt_Free_Chick

Just to give another view .... you gave your cats away - and I can completely understand why that was necessary. However, having given them away, you seem to want to have some ongoing relationship with them and/or their new owner. As someone who has taken in a cat in the past two years, I think you are being a little unreasonable. Perhaps the new owner thinks you are "checking up" on them or wanting to have an ongoing relationship with them.

You need to forget the cats. They are no longer your responsibility. You handed over any responsibility to the new owner. Leave him/her alone - leave the cats alone. they are no longer anything to do with you.

You can't have it both ways - I'm sorry if that seems harsh, but you handed the cats over to another person, so it's only fair that you leave them alone to care for them. That person might not do what you would have done, but that doesn't mean that they're a bad owner.

maggied_2

DFC may have a point. However don't feel too bad about the 'stranger' thing - lots of people do this.

A stranger gave us our kittens and they are very well looked after!!:D

jcr16

Not everyone profits from cats being given to them.

a few years back there was an advert on a local site saying home needed for 2 5 yr old male cats due to change in circumstances. We replied. Met the owner . she had spilt from her partner and had to move and new home wouldn't allow cats. She came and looked at our house with her sister. they were happy and she gave the cats to us. we were complete strangers.

The cats have been with us for 3 years now and we love them to bit's. i did offer for her to call at any time and see them. she said she would but never has.

our new boys are a huge part of our life. my middle son was 1 when we got them and he dotes of jeffery ( he is a huge ginger fluff ball. size and cheekieness of garfield,lol)They have a fantastic relationship.best thing we ever did was to give them a home.

gingin_2

Are you male? If someone had turned up on my doorstep alone and unannounced, asking to come inside I would definitely say no. If they had phoned ahead then fine and I would have made sure someone else was in.

We rehomed our cat from an advert, we checked them out and they checked us out (she was allergic to him) and we have gained the perfect cat who seems very happy with us. I also told them they were welcome to keep in touch but they didn't, which I think was probably out of respect for us.

Treacly

Debt_Free_Chick wrote: »

You need to forget the cats. They are no longer your responsibility. You handed over any responsibility to the new owner. Leave him/her alone - leave the cats alone. they are no longer anything to do with you.

Exactly right. We got our beloved cat (via Cats Protection, admittedly) from a previous owner who decided cats & babies didn't mix. Their loss - and at the risk of sounding a bit Royston Vasey, he's OUR cat now. New name, new super-happy life with us and if the people who GAVE HIM AWAY turned up on the doorstep wanting to visit I'd send them packing quick-smart. Bit harsh I know - sorry OP. How's your little girl? Allergies cleared up?

melancholly

i have to say, this is a stranger so you shouldn't expect to be able to walk around the house to look for the cat.... they may be private, have left a tip upstairs or just not like the idea of a stranger poking about.

it's also warm weather.... leaving a window open isn't really a massive thing.... cats can get into tiny places but that's not an indication that this is a 'bad' person. you also gave away the cats so have no need of the cat carrier....... perhaps you could have sold it and that might have made it a little better, but keeping it would have made no sense.

i think they were a little abrupt, but that you are also over-reacting..... it's difficult if these were loved pets, but don't let that completely colour your view. they are now her pets and that means you don't really get any say over how she chooses to look after them.

realistically, going back to check on loved pets would always be emotional as you feel guilt over not being able to keep them..... however the meeting went, you would feel bad as they were your pets..... so i get that you're upset, but i think your expectations aren't as reasonable as you think they are - sorry!

Pollycat

baby_2009
I can see why you and your partner are concerned about the cats, but I do also agree with a number of other posters:

i have to say, this is a stranger so you shouldn't expect to be able to walk around the house to look for the cat.... they may be private, have left a tip upstairs or just not like the idea of a stranger poking about.

However, having given them away, you seem to want to have some ongoing relationship with them and/or their new owner. As someone who has taken in a cat in the past two years, I think you are being a little unreasonable. Perhaps the new owner thinks you are "checking up" on them or wanting to have an ongoing relationship with them.

Especially if you are male (not sure if you are but think so from what's been said so far), the lady may have been a bit wary if you turned up on your own.

And although

The lady said we can go anytime to see them.

maybe she thought that you wouldn't.

I took in a cat that my friend had.
I'd loved him from the moment I saw him as a tiny kitten. For some reason, he just didn't settle into her household and, quite frankly, I coveted this cat and every time she moaned about what he'd done, I said 'If you ever want to get rid of him, I'll take him'.
It took me 6 months to get my hands on him but, in the end, she rang up and said 'Do you want him? If not, he's off to the RSPCA'. :eek:
I said 'Yes, of course I'll have him but if I do ,there's no chance of you having him back and I don't want him confused by you coming up to see him'.
Maybe that's one thing the new owner is worried about.
As it turned out, he was the most lovely natured, beautiful cat I've ever had and we had 12 great years together.

As someone else has said, I think you just have to accept that you did what you thought was the best for them at the time.
As others have said, if a cat is not happy, they'll find somebody else to live with.

Steel_2

I don't think she's given them away. I think she's got annoyed (and possibly frightened) by you pitching up on her doorstep and wanting to traipse round her home. Did you not phone first?

My three cats sleep on our bed for most of the afternoon. No-one is allowed upstairs in my house, either to see them or for any other reason come to that.

And certainly not a male stranger!

You gave the cats away. You can't have an ongoing relationship with them.

Make-it-3

Are they indoor cats? Is she saying one escaped and ran away?

However, whatever the circumstances, I agree, if you gave your cats away, you can't expect to have an ongoing relationship with them. The lady was probably trying to be nice by saying 'pop round' and didn't mean it, especially if you arrived unexpectedly.

I doubt she sold them on there's not much market for adult cats (assumming they're not pedigrees).