I'm in a right pickle

inafinancialmess

Re the life insurance I'm going to wait til the end of this month poss next as Im due £50 cashback for taking it out and a £200 holiday voucher so I don't want to miss that.

Bossyboots

inafinancialmess wrote:

I dont buy lunch at work, I work in the evenings til 10. I would love to do overtime through the day at the moment as it is there but I'm the free babysitter til mum gets home.

I know I need to get rid of the gym however, I've been putting it off as its the only place I find peace. Im thinking of joining a sunday morning jogging club instead for £2 a week. Re mobile Im locked into my contract til January.

Personally I think you should do all you can to keep your gym membership, especially in view of this post. You need to have something for you, even if your siblings have to go without.

jessicamb

Bossyboots wrote:

Personally I think you should do all you can to keep your gym membership, especially in view of this post. You need to have something for you, even if your siblings have to go without.

I've changed my mind - I agree too. You do need something for yourself

Willsnarf1983

Sorry to be blunt but you seem to be avoiding the questions about your mum!

Why are you left supporting her mess?


Will

LJD1_2

Hiya, sorry i've not got a huge amount to add to what's been said. If I was you i'd try to keep the gym as it's clearly a time for you where you can recharge your batteries. I know it's family but you have to put yourself first sometimes. Also, huge hugs to you xx

inafinancialmess

The gym is my oasis of calm along with keeping me fit but Im thinking til I get the highest APRs paid off it might be best to do the jogging and throw the £29 at my debt. I will miss it loads but in practical terms. I might joing the uni gym in september, its £30 a year and I could go between classes depending on time.

Kids go back to school on August 21st so I have from then til 1st October to rake in the overtime so that should help too.

inafinancialmess

Im not avoiding the mum issue its just that my mum is a difficult one.
We don't have a great relationship. She resents me for the chances I've has in life that she didnt. She and Dad had me when they were 16, she more or less think I ruined her life and she isn't shy about telling me that.
Dad pays no maintainence. We havn't heard anything from him in 2 years, no one knows where he is and if his side of the family know they aint telling.

She earns about £800pm. Thats full time wages, I've told her often to get another job but she wont. After mortgage, insurances, gas+electric etc and til recently nursery and some childminding fees from what I can see there aint much left. She has no debt though which Im pleased to say though how she manages I dont quite know. She doesnt use an overdraft. she had an inheritance when I was 16 so I suspect that has taken a major hit.

Re car insurance its high because I'm under 21.

Bossyboots

As you have the Uni gym, then you could ditch the other one and use the saving to service your debt.

I am glad you have expanded on the situation with your mum. That must have been hard for you to do in the circumstances.

What you have put though has just reinforced my view that enough is enough. I am not even advocating sitting down with her and dealing with this anymore. I think she has used you enough. It was not your fault you were born. It is up to her and your dad to care for the children they produced. She will have to track him down and claim maintenance from him. That is her problem not yours. She is managing because she is sponging off you.

Is she claiming all the child tax credits and/or working credits she is entitled to? Is she claiming the 25% discount on her council tax?

jessicamb

Bossyboots wrote:

She is managing because she is sponging off you.QUOTE]

I completely agree.

inafinancialmess

Bossyboots wrote:

As you have the Uni gym, then you could ditch the other one and use the saving to service your debt.

I am glad you have expanded on the situation with your mum. That must have been hard for you to do in the circumstances.

What you have put though has just reinforced my view that enough is enough. I am not even advocating sitting down with her and dealing with this anymore. I think she has used you enough. It was not your fault you were born. It is up to her and your dad to care for the children they produced. She will have to track him down and claim maintenance from him. That is her problem not yours. She is managing because she is sponging off you.

Is she claiming all the child tax credits and/or working credits she is entitled to? Is she claiming the 25% discount on her council tax?

Yes to the council tax, had that done when I told them I was a student. I know she gets tax credits but dont know how much. I've just got to the point that Im so tired of it all. I know I can get rid of £900 in september/october time though I should use it for uni I can use my wages for anything I need. I buy all my book in the second hand shop anyway. Save money with paper etc by taking my laptop everywhere too. The best gift I ever got!