DS very bad behaviour in school

Counting_Pennies_2

I would look at diet and environment as well as managing the behaviour with rewards etc.

My son was watching a bit of Ben 10, and would have soe Ben 10 read to him at night. I didn't notice his behaviour instantly get worse, but it got much worse over a couple of weeks, and ended up with him being aggresive at school. When we were informed of this, we looked at his environment and this was one of the areas we instantly put a ban on.

We also arranged for him to go in to school with a drink for each break. I found he more he was without water during the day the worse he got, to the point when he got to the end of the day he was at his worst. The teacher now ensures he takes his drinks at each break.

Also ensure no sugar is in his diet, this too can aggrevate bad behaviour if the tendancy is within them. Humzingers are a good pure fruit alternative to the supposedly healthy fruit snacks out here. Raisins, yoghurts, are always favourites of my son. I also put in an Innocent Smoothie for his lunch time drink.

Break times he has fruit or a packet of Organix Goodies biscuits.

Also have a look at the sleep as suggested above, sometimes they are so hyped up they can't settle. He would be awake until 10pm just churning everything through his head. It took for me to lay on my sons bed with him at night just stroking his head, having a quick chat about the day, and letting him silently fall asleep with me stroking his head so he goes to sleep with happy thoughts. It would only take 10 - 15 mins and that was worth it to have a child who had slept properly.

I also think a very stern word with him, saying it is completely unacceptable, that you will be incredibly disappointed in him if you are to be called back in to see the teacher about his bad behaviour. Perhaps say if he is good at school, and his teacher reports to you on a Friday that all has gone well, that he can have a small treat, magazine, trip somewhere at the weekend, so he has an incentive.

Good luck

egon

This is the first time he has thrown chairs. This has never happened before. Yes, I am worried about this, as he doesn't do anything like this at home.

He has always been on the extreme side. His behavior over the last few month has got a lot better at home though. We are strict with them (DS1 and DS2). I do not accept hitting/ kicking etc. When he does anything bad at home, we send him to his room until he calms down and then we explain to him why he was send up. He has missed out on birthday parties and other things before, because of his behavior.

We had a talk with the head today. I am worried, as DS1 is a lot worse at school then at home. The ed phys is going to turn up 2 days after school term start. I think this might be a little early, as he is refreshed and happy for the first few weeks. The head is surprised, that he is this way. He mentioned, that usually it is the other way around. Good at school, but worse at home.

When we picked DS1 up after school today, he was fine. We talked about it. He says, he didn't throw the chair at his teacher on purpose. But we always make it clear to him, that his behavior is not acceptable.

For some reason, his behavior is a lot worse at school then at home. When you would of known him at 2, you would think he is an angel now. My husband and I had a long "heart to heart" about our sons behavior and worked very hard on turning it around. Yes, he still shows signs of his old behavior, but it doesn't last long and starting to get few and far between.
I am worried, that as he is like this at school, that it will get worse again at home.

I've spoken to his teacher before and asked her to be strict with him. I explained what we do at home when he behaves bad etc. I know though, that she isn't that strict with him. I want to work with his teacher on this, but I feel she has already decided he is always a bad one. I also do understand that it is hard for her, as she has the whole class to look after.
There is one teaching assistant, who seem to have "sussed" (can't think of a better word) him out. They get along brilliantly and even when she notices that he is having a bad day, she seem to get through to him.

DS1 always goes to bed at 7pm. He usually wakes up between 6 and 6.30 am. This is good for him. He never seem to need much sleep!?!

I feel powerless about it at the moment. I am interested in what the ed phys is saying.

jenhug

has he had a hearing test? an eye test? keep a food diary also.
does he have any ritual habit type things that he has to do to or he gets stressed?

sporedude

vaio wrote: »

My brother threw a book at a fellow pupil when he was that sort of age, the teacher slapped his legs and told my mother who also slapped his legs. The problem arose and was dealt with all on the same afternoon.

No worried/scared/frustrated teacher, educational psychologists, focusing on strategies or reward charts. A couple of slaps, some tears and that was the end of a promising book throwing career.

Life was so much easier 40 years ago in the bad old days

Was wondering when you lot would show up.

ChrisCobra

vaio wrote: »

My brother threw a book at a fellow pupil when he was that sort of age, the teacher slapped his legs and told my mother who also slapped his legs. The problem arose and was dealt with all on the same afternoon.

No worried/scared/frustrated teacher, educational psychologists, focusing on strategies or reward charts. A couple of slaps, some tears and that was the end of a promising book throwing career.

Life was so much easier 40 years ago in the bad old days

That dosent solve anything , whats needed here is probably a dose of parenting and checks of the childs health.

vaio

sporedude wrote: »

Was wondering when you lot would show up.

just sharing a bit of history with the youngsters who weren't lucky enough to be there

manclad09

From a kid of nearly 5 years of age.......is a shame.
Don't think this behaviour will be something he will just "grow out of"

Miss_Imaginative

egon,

It sounds like you're on the right track. I'm pleased you've had a meeting with the Head Teacher and that they share your concerns. As this is the first time he's thrown chairs, then you should be able to knock any issues on the head promptly. It will all work out, egon, it might just take some time.

I'd keep reinforcing to the class teacher how strict she needs to be with your son, mention it to the Head if you haven't already. I can sympathise completely with the teacher in that if you're not a naturally strict teacher, sometimes it's hard to change your style to one child in particular. But, it needs to be done! But this is why I'm pleased your son's Teaching Assistant has got him sussed and has built a good relationship with him, I'd use this to your advantage. Considering the class teacher has the whole class to look after, I'd call for the TA (Teaching Assistant) to play a bigger role in your son's discipline as she has such a good relationship with him - she can keep a bit more of an eye on him and be able to spot his bad days - she may even be able to spot what triggers his behaviour. It's something you, the class teacher and the Head Teacher can work out together, but their relationship is something that jumps out at me that you should use to help resolve this situation.

Your little boy reminds me of a little boy I used to look after. I previously worked at a nursery and we had a little boy whose behaviour sounds very similar to your sons - absolute angel in comparison to previous behaviour, but still prone to extreme outbursts? We found that it was because he was struggling to communicate when he was angry and why, so we made a 'mood board' for him which was by our desk. It was literally a big paper circle with three photos on and a clothes peg that could be moved around the edge. At the top of the circle (12 o'clock) a 'happy face' photo of him, then at 4 o'clock a sad face photo of him and at 8 o'clock an angry photo of him. The boy in question then moved the clothes peg around the edge onto the appropriate photo to show us how he was feeling - so if something had happened to make him angry, he could tell us in that way and we could talk to him and identify the cause. I hope that makes sense, because along with being strict and explaining why he'd been sent to the thinking chair/his room at home, it worked a treat and his behaviour calmed right down. It took a while, but when I left the nursery he was the angel I knew he could be. Anyway, tangent.

If the Ed Psych meeting doesn't bring up anything (as it's too soon), then if problems re-arise then the school can call the Ed Psych back in if/when needs be. The fact of the matter is that you're all working together and keen to find a resolution to this as soon as possible.

Enjoy your Easter break together and see how things go when you get back. It will all work out in the end, egon, never fear.

Miss_I