Home Alone???

kaznelson

The Summer Holidays are upon us again and I am thinking of allowing my 13 year old daughter (nearly 14) to look after my 10 year old son whilst I am at work.

It will only be for 1 day a week, between the 9am - 3 pm.

I will be 5 mins drive away and we have 3 grandparents all within 10 mins walking time. (The other days the grandparents will be looking after the children but I think they may need a break as they are all getting on now!!)

It will be a strictly no friends in the house & no going out basis.

My daughter is very mature and I totally trust her

But I am I doing the right thing??? I've checked out the web and there is no age limit to what age you have to be to look after a sibling etc.

My husband and family reckon they will be fine but I am still racked with guilt???

homersimpson_3

why not pop home for first day to check everything ok and say grandparent check in the afternoon - to put your mind at rest if anything. or ring them? do you have lunch hour? if only 5 minutes shouldn't be a problem.

kittykate_2

They'll be fine. You just feel bad because you haven't left them on their own like this before. It'll get easier.

dora37

I wouldn't want to put the responsibility on the 13 year old to look after the 10 year old.......is it really fair, after all they are children not adults?

From a different perspective, I live next door to 2 families that leave their children 'home alone' and whilst they don't do terrible things, they still do things that they wouldn't do if their parents were there and sometimes it is down to me to point out that these things, though not the worse thing in the world, are not appropriate to be doing.......revving petrol mowers, all the windows open and music on mega mega full blast for an extremely long time (:eek: ), so if I make the choice to stay at home with my children, why do I sometimes have to look out for others that have nothing to do with me?

funky-footprints

Im sorry you are in this predicament but as a mum i do not feel any 13 year old is responsible enough to care for other chlidren ? do you let your 13 year old babysit ? ? Id send them to grandparents.
sorry to be so negative.

kaznelson

Thanks for all your comments

My 13 year old is actually looking forward and wants to be in "charge" for the day!!! She doesnt see the big deal as lots of her friends are left alone. I have no doubt I will be calling them every 30 mins and they also have my direct line number etched into their brains!!!!

Dora - If they upset the neighbours in anyway I will find out and they know it!!! But revving petrol engines??

Funky - Yes my daughter would be allowed to babysit a young child, but not a baby, as she is mature for her age.

Its so hard, when I was a child I was a latch-key kid from the age of 9 but didnt have any siblings. My mum was a single parent and had to work late to support us both. It never did me any harm so why am I worrying!!

Thanks again and I will continue to muddle this over, again and again ..................

dora37

A 13 year old being responsible for herself is one thing, however being responsible for somebody else is another.

I personally wouldn't leave the oldest one for that long and would absolutely not leave a 10 year old without adult supervision at all.

Your call, however people will probably have different opinions.

(My children are 15,12 & 4.5).

mishkanorman

Me and my sister were left on a regular basis, we understood why, had the odd fight, nothing major.
I actually remember the worst things happening when my parents were home (my sister cut my lip open with a pair of scissors - they were both sat downstairs totally oblivious)

If you trust your daughter tell her so, explain that the only reason you are doing this is cos you know she would never let you down. Guilt works every time !!

I left home at 16 and although its not the same thing different people mature at different ages, its all in the nurture. Have faith that youv'e done a good job


mishka

Jay-Jay_4

I don't think that this question can be answered as it is all relative. I know some 10 year olds that are very childlike and I wouldn't imagine that they could cope alone all day but there are some who are perfectly capable of caring for themselves especially with an older sibling around. OP I presume that you're the best person to make this decision based on how well you know your children.

Dazzieboo

On my local radio station, the reporters went into town and asked a few people what they would do with their children in the holidays. All the people interviewed said they would leave their children at home, alone. The youngest was 11.

The radio station obviously thought nothing of it, as they aired the interviews, the website has now been innundated with messages saying kids should not be left on their own under the age of 14.

It is an interesting debate.

On a personal view, my 10 year old is very mature and adult and if she continues this way, I will have no hesitation in leaving her in a couple of years time. My 8 yr old Son is the opposite and unless he improves, I think leaving him alone when he is 18 will still give me the wobblies !!!

reehsetin

if you trust your kids and think they are mature enough do it - not every kid is going to abuse the situation especially with people 5 mins down the road who can pop in any min!
me and my bro used to spend a couple of hours each day after school alone before my parents came home
happened ever since i started secondary school and my bro is only a year older than me


but if you can admit to yourself that they may be the type to be easily swayed or get easily excited about alcohol and may see it as an opportunity to to get a bit merry stick um with the grand parents