Nice people thread 2 - now even nicer

SingleSue

Ok, I have recently read...

Robin Cook - Errr, forgotten the title!
Patricia Cornwell - Scarpetta
W200 Understanding Law units 19-24
True Crime magazine
True Detective magazine
Master Detective magazine.

Currently reading
W200 Understanding Law unit 25
John Grisham - Ford County

Talking about books, going to cost me an absolute fortune to get the required books for eldest and his A levels, quite a few of which he needs before the start of term and before EMA is received. Have found a few on Amazon second hand and brother also has one of the required books (All Quiet on the Western front), plus I also already have one of the DVD's required (Blackadder goes forth).

Just got to find the money now! (Hurry up cheque from pet insurance)

wageslave

My tastes tend to run to the trashy too:(

This week I have read........

I am Nujood, aged 10 and divorced.

Mercedes Lackeys 500 Kingdoms series (all 5-was it 5?) TBH I skimmed through them.

I have all of the above in ebooks if anyone wants them. Actually I have all Lackeys stuff although I am not a huuuuge fan.

I also spent an entire night reading some really decent poetry from the American deep south which I found online. Typically, I have managed to lose the link and have been googling random phrases in the hope of finding the site again.

I gave up reading the "final solution" stuff when I hit my 20's, I got to W in the library and figured I was more a Wodehouse woman than a Goebbels gal. I told ya...... trashy:p

It's interesting to read about other peoples take on their relationships and the reasons they can't (or won't) move on.

I suspect it is more about the people we are than the relationships we have had. We each decide whether our lives will be a comedy or a tragedy.

I imagine my husband was no better or worse than Sues sans the illness (is selfishness classed as a disease yet?).

The brat and I have the odd serious discussion about her father too. She loves him very much and gets really cross if I am less than sympathetic towards him. Which I am, frequently:o

I don't like him and find it v hard to pretend I do. I know I should yada yada yada........

A few years back she turned up at my place of employment, a little round, sweetfaced girl on a bike. She was in an absolute panic, her Da had met her from school and told her we getting back together.

She was crying and saying Mam, Mam, tell me you aren't.

That was the last time we talked seriously about him.

Ever since she realised there was absolutely no chance of her ever sharing an abode with him again, she has been all eye rolling and "oh my Mother, she hates my Da, she is soooooo unreasonable.........."

SingleSue

To be perfectly honest, although I was burned by my relationship, I can't actually see me being with someone else for the sheer fact I love my new independence.

No-one to complain if I have an early night, no-one to complain if I have a late night, my choice if I buy something or not buy something, peace and blooming quiet on a Sunday morning instead of being poked in the back by errr... something.

It's actually quite liberating!

LydiaJ

I value my independence too (especially that nobody spends money on stuff we can't afford), but that doesn't make me feel I want to be single for the rest of my life ... just that next time I want to pick someone who doesn't have such absolute certainty that he's right all the time and everyone else is wrong.

I can say positive things to my kids about their dad, and I do. They need me to - it's part of grieving for him since he died. But I find it harder when they want me to tell them about how we met or when we got married or something. Son asks every so often why Daddy stopped loving me, or why he left, and I don't know how to answer those questions either.

wageslave

So do I.

I didn't to begin with. I thought the whole being single thing was just a prelude to doing matching anoraks again. I sort of did serial relationships for the first couple of years, convinced I was just waiting for the one. Because you are aren't you? I mean it isn't natural to be on your own......

And then I found the one, the perfect bloke supposedly. Only he wasn't perfect and I really didn't feel like putting in the effort to batter him into shape. Around about then I was hit by a novel idea. What if I just dump Mr Right and just go on about my business? I thought give it a year, do your own thing, he (or someone like him) will still be around.

Five years later (it could be more, I have time on ignore these days) I am still waiting to be struck dumb with the need for a man in my life.

I know it isn't normal (my Ma tells my how abnormal I am at least once a week) but I really like being on my own. I stand or fall by my own efforts and I have never been happier. I really, seriously couldn't ever go back to all that pretending to give a sh it thing.

It doesn't matter anymore whether my husband was a good or a bad man or whether I am a good or a bad woman. Whether he was a bully or I was a difficult cow. Who cares anymore?

This is who I am now.

wageslave

LydiaJ wrote: »

I value my independence too (especially that nobody spends money on stuff we can't afford), but that doesn't make me feel I want to be single for the rest of my life ... just that next time I want to pick someone who doesn't have such absolute certainty that he's right all the time and everyone else is wrong.

I can say positive things to my kids about their dad, and I do. They need me to - it's part of grieving for him since he died. But I find it harder when they want me to tell them about how we met or when we got married or something. Son asks every so often why Daddy stopped loving me, or why he left, and I don't know how to answer those questions either.

My advice and God knows I get everything wrong, tell them the truth as you see it.

They will pick their own truth but you owe them honesty

vivatifosi

SingleSue wrote: »

Talking about books, going to cost me an absolute fortune to get the required books for eldest and his A levels, quite a few of which he needs before the start of term and before EMA is received. Have found a few on Amazon second hand and brother also has one of the required books (All Quiet on the Western front), plus I also already have one of the DVD's required (Blackadder goes forth).

Why don't you post a list on here? It may be between us we've got a couple of them that you won't need to stump up for.

I'm dead jealous that you can study Blackadder now. Still poignant, but way more laughs than Wilfred Owen.

sjaypink

wageslave wrote: »

My advice and God knows I get everything wrong, tell them the truth as you see it.

They will pick their own truth but you owe them honesty

Don't put yourself down, you got that spot on

vivatifosi wrote: »

Why don't you post a list on here? It may be between us we've got a couple of them that you won't need to stump up for.

I'm dead jealous that you can study Blackadder now. Still poignant, but way more laughs than Wilfred Owen.

Talking (kind of ) about changes in education, my local papers front page was that EVERYONE at our college passed their A-Levels? I mean if they want to stop the 'dumbing down' accusations..... this isn't an intelligent area either (if you weren't aware ).....

misskool

I love Wilfred Owen. I memorised Dulce et Decorum Est as a sort of mantra for a while.

Eng Lit was my fav subject and taught me how to read properly. Although I've been reading trash-tastic books and watching CSI on my laptop on the train as work has been too knackering. (I have just arrived home for my Friday evening)

Malcolm.

Oops. I thought this was supposed to be an economic forum, not loose women.