Mummytogirls - 100 years to be debtfree - I think not!

Alice_in_Poorland

Hi mummy, sorry to hear things have gone a bit pear shaped. It's horrible when the kitchen is in a mess as its a room you can't really shut the door and forget about. Hope you soon get sorted.

Great news on OHs payrise. xx

pennywisepoundstupid

Sorry to hear about the mayhem with the boiler, hopefully it will be sorted soon and you can have your kitchen back to normal.

mummytogirls

Morning Diary,

Had a really tough day yesterday, DD2 is being a total swine just recently and yesterday morning I just totally lost the plot and felt like I couldnt go on . Went off to work, then after got to mil's to pick her up and it started again and I ended up storming out of mil's house. Anyway, I told her what had been going on and she offered to have the girls over night. This offer doesnt come up very often so I took it. Cried all the way home in the car as I feel like the sh!ttest parent on earth but I cannot control my 3 year old. Just dont know where to turn tbh, im wondering if I need to see the health visitor with her or something, but tbh they would probably think I was making it up as infront of them she would be a complete angel. Theyd need to put a secret camera up to capture the constant battles.
Woke up 7am which is ridiculous considering theres no kids here. Hopefully a break will have done us all good.
I feel like on paper everything seems to perfect but we are all so miserable living in this house as it stands. I felt so sorry for DD1 yesterday, she just sat there through all of this eating her breakfast in silence. They never see any arguing or anything and its not something I want them to see but it all just got too much.

Anyway, its not like I can throw her out like I would if DH was misbehaving, just dont know where to turn I guess. I never imagined being a parent would be this hard.

Nothing to report money wise, hope everyones ok xx

bagpuss38

Sorry to hear you are having a tough time, i'm sure kids are designed to drive us to distraction.
It would be v easy if we didnt love them so very much and they know this hey?
To offer you some comfort, myself and dd1 fought like cat and dog. Really badlywhen she was between the ages of 12 and 16.
Now at nearly 20 we have a great relationship which i never thought possible given the constant death threats
:eek:
It will get better, take time to regroup and it will pass
Good luck
from a happy but slightly battered scared mummy:)
x

Alice_in_Poorland

awww mummy sorry to hear about your rubbish day, you know I bet there a hundreds if not thousands of parents that could have written your post, all having/going through the same thing.

You are doing a fab job bringing up your family, working, running the house etc etc but these kids don't half try us don't they.

DS1 and DS2 were angels when they were younger but DS3 has been (and still is on occasions!!) and real challenge. I can remember the day of his first trantrum (we were at a football match with DS1), he was about 2 1/2 and it just snowballed from there. 99% of the time it was just when he was with me and OH, at the childminders or my parents he was an angel. I felt like he was punishing me for going back to work, which in turn made me feel even more of a failure because although I was back at work we still didn't have any money and the debt was spiralling. I also worried that the other 2 were feeling left out. He's 5 now and although still has the odd tantrum they are getter less and less........hopefully have a break before the teenage trantrums start:eek:

Sorry to ramble on and I hope that you managed to have a bit of 'me' time today and some quality time with OH without the kids.xx

mummytogirls

Morning Diary,

Bagpuss and Alice, thanks for your lovely posts. Yesterday was better, she tried to test but I kept my cool and won the battle! As soon as I picked them up I said we are going to have a nice day today and all think of each others feelings. We were out and about most of the day as they had 2 parties back to back. Today will be a test as we are all here together.
She already has, taken 1 mouthful of her breakfast then said she didnt want it. So I didnt get cross like I usually do, I said fine then thats nothing else for you until lunch. She is so hit and miss with breakfast, she either wolfs it down and asks for more or asks for it then doesnt eat it. Id rather she just said im not very hungry or something?
This will probably sound totally ridiculous but ive been having battles with her since the day she was born. She knew from a week old that she did not want a bottle and totally refused it, next came the dummy, then weaning, then sleeping! Its been like this for nearly 4 years now and I guess im just worn out. I hate wishing her life away but I cant wait for her to get out of these tantrums.
I thought DD1 was difficult but that was just because it was all new to me, she is an absolute model child, could do with 2 of her haha!!

Anyway, ive just done my meter readings, havent done them for 4 weeks! I really need to start keeping on top of these things but by the time I realise on an evening its dark and my meters are outside! Weve used £94 which equates to £23.50 a week which isnt bad considering weve had the heating on as its been cold. We are £131 in credit which is good but I can feel it being eaten away with winter just around the corner.

Today I need to take DD1 to her swimming lesson. Ive got a joint of beef out for tea and ive also got some mince out to make a lasagne too.
Wont be doing much but cooking and catching up with the housework. Its looks like quite a nice day so the kids can play out whilst its nice.

Think thats all from me, catch up soon xx

Alice_in_Poorland

Hi mummy, well done for keeping our cool yesterday. I know exactly where you coming from re breakfast time. Even putting the spoon in the cereal instead of on the table can start DS3 off.

Hope you have a good day today.xx

Ladybird.

I feel your pain! I have a very challenging nearly-3 year old boy and it is enough to send you over the edge some days! Over the summer I bought a book that was recommended to me called 'Toddler Taming' by Christopher Green; some quite useful advice in it and food for thought. You can pick up a used copy on Amazon for a couple of pounds

mummytogirls

Hi Diary,

Alice, im surprised were not off in the mental institute with these kids!! That would something that would set DD2 off too!

Thanks for the tip on the book ladybird, I will have a look into it.

Well I am absolutely on fire today! Took DD to her swimming lesson, made a BLT for brunch, made a lasagne, put a joint of beef in the oven, made the yorkshire pudding batter, washed the bin out and 2 loads of washing! 1 load was the bedding which is now on the bed.
DD's have been well behaved today, which is good! Ive been clear and to the point in my instructions and they have listened to me!

Right think thats all from me. Hope everyones ok xx

LivvyLoo_2

Hi Mummy,

Sorry to hear about DD2 being a pest. When my DD went through a bad stage I tried allsorts, the naughty step, telling her off, taking things away but nothing worked until I got the reward chart out. Its like having a new kid...at the moment she is being good as Father Christmas is watching all the time

My DD is the same with food, sometimes she will eat lots other times she won't. I tend not to make a fuss of it but its so frustrating and will be costing me a fortune.

Hope things get sorted for you soon.

xx