£100,000 Debt "club"

Debtomaniak

Emmzi wrote:

Ok, that makes more sense to me now.

However, I don't think the situation is as simple as you would like it to be.

Imagining I am a creditor.. why is there so much equity in the house? Because hubby's been paying the mortgage. How? By borrowing from me. So what you THINK is your share of the house, is really mine.

If you are going to argue for a share of the assets, I think you take a share of the liabilities, too. Because you have (perhaps) been living on the proceeds of the debts. Different if it's gambling debt, maybe.

I think your situation is too complex to go into the amount of detail needed on a public forum. Anything I offer will be my 'best guess.' Experts for you, I am afraid.

Thank you, I think we need professional help as well. Just whilst he is "getting there", I drive myself mad, thinking it all over and over again. Sorry people, can't help myself. Do not mean to waste anyone's time.

Emmzi

You're not wasting time. You're exploring options, and working out the right questions to ask. That's very important- if you don't have question list, you may get stitched up like a kipper! But you seem to be on top of it and know what you need to know.

xx

Debtomaniak

Emmzi wrote:

Enough to tell me it won't be straightforward... his 'share' includes deposit too. You need an expert.. if you are going to CCCS etc, you need to be sure you get one of their really experienced specialists to talk to. You will have *some* interest in the house, but I would be surprised if it comes out at 50%.

I'm not making you happy this evening am I.

Thank you for "talking" to me. I am winding myself up now and start to bother people as well. I must be patient and wait till he makes that call. I must admit I was surprised, when the expert told me that I would have a 50% share in the house. If I did than at least we would know that some of His moneyu is safe, being in my name.

Debtomaniak

Emmzi wrote:

You're not wasting time. You're exploring options, and working out the right questions to ask. That's very important- if you don't have question list, you may get stitched up like a kipper! But you seem to be on top of it and know what you need to know.

xx

Thank you, I really am grateful to you and everyone else who replies. It is just my nature, if something bothers me I can not get it out of my head and would try to get to the bottom of it. Face it, rather then run away. Although you can't always fix everything. Oh well, will do whatever I can.

Emmzi

No worries.

As well as advice for him, you need a solicitor just to look after your interests. CAB legal advice first thing Monday!

kickingkay

Hi Hun you are most certainly not bothering me, you want to be able to sleep tonight without having to try and work things out so much your head hurts,
i can honestly say you will be able to sleep at night soon, as soon as wheels are in motion and you know what direction you will be going in then it will become easier to turn off to it at night.
hubby will have to sit down and get outstanding figures from everyopne he owes so he/both can sort out who gets what and how, have you researched teh house prices in your area how long they take to sell etc and how much renting will be, you sound very young in comparisom to some on here who have to start again so dont see it as an end but a new beginning,
i have some equity but not enough to clear all debts and if it was we wouldn't have a pot to pee in as they say, (you could try looking at it as dead money/ whats left is the equity not the amount before debt but after debt is paid off then you wont feel so sick)
you cant do very much tomorrow so have a day of fun play cards eat icecream whatever chills you out even if it is for an hour
klare xx

Debtomaniak

Emmzi wrote:

No worries.

As well as advice for him, you need a solicitor just to look after your interests. CAB legal advice first thing Monday!

Hope there is no shame in asking daft questions, what does CAB mean?

kickingkay

citizen advice bureau

Debtomaniak

kickingkay wrote:

Hi Hun you are most certainly not bothering me, you want to be able to sleep tonight without having to try and work things out so much your head hurts,
i can honestly say you will be able to sleep at night soon, as soon as wheels are in motion and you know what direction you will be going in then it will become easier to turn off to it at night.
hubby will have to sit down and get outstanding figures from everyopne he owes so he/both can sort out who gets what and how, have you researched teh house prices in your area how long they take to sell etc and how much renting will be, you sound very young in comparisom to some on here who have to start again so dont see it as an end but a new beginning,
i have some equity but not enough to clear all debts and if it was we wouldn't have a pot to pee in as they say, (you could try looking at it as dead money/ whats left is the equity not the amount before debt but after debt is paid off then you wont feel so sick)
you cant do very much tomorrow so have a day of fun play cards eat icecream whatever chills you out even if it is for an hour
klare xx

Your words make my heart warm, thank you. I did laugh that you said I sound young, I am 30 and all my friends and my mum say that I am like an old woman, because somehow I end up being most sensible, maybe mixing with the wrong crowd (he-he), my friends would have killed me if they read this, only kidding. I did look at the prices in our area and that is how I got rough idea for our house. Houses here sell pretty quick. Location is pretty good. Loveliest neighboors, I will miss them.
I know what you say is wright, must think possitive. Just have my moments, keeping brave face for hubby as well, could not let him see I am panicking, could not deal with him blaiming himself. I know he feels s---ty now. Excuse my french.

Debtomaniak

kickingkay wrote:

citizen advice bureau

Thank you
I heard from some folks CAB are not much of a help. Not sure if it is true though. Maybe it depends where you are in UK?