brakedown

bltchef

hi ian 47 i have live wiyh my partner for 13 years and here 2 kids 1 hates me other e get on great in the last 8 years i have delt with 16 attemed suicide 3 ended icu they both spend a lot time in bed theyt do not get out bed till 3 or 4 in the aftreenoon my partner says she not well the daughter says if a mums in bed she can she is 19 i work full time do most of the house work i have no life it feels like i am a going under i want to leave but i have concerns if left on owen what will happen sorry just neede to tell some one

gingin_2

Hi bltchef

Are you saying it is your partner's 2 children that have attempted suicide 16 times between them and that you are miserable in the realtionship and want to leave but are worried about making thigs worse?

Just want to clarify things so you can get some good advice.

And don't apologise, you'll get some good advice

bltchef

no my parner has attempted suicide 16 times in 8 yes work hard to keep everbody together if i go it could be a lot worse

angelicmary85

What are the reason's behind the suicide attempts?

gingin_2

angelicmary85 wrote: »

What are the reason's behind the suicide attempts?

And what help is your partner currently receiving, in terms of counselling, medication?

angelicmary85

gingin wrote: »

And what help is your wife currently receiving, in terms of counselling, medication?

That was going to be the next question!

bltchef

do not know she is love my me but never seams to be happy allways want something else she is adopted the daughet has been very difficuilt over the yearshas not may it easy for anyone

mrcow

Ian - you sound like you've got it all landing on top of you.

You work full time - everyone is putting on you, you are having to deal with all of this alone - what support are you getting?

Do you have any friends that you can see/talk things through with?

I realise that you are saying that you don't want to leave, but this can't carry on can it?!

Your daughter needs to get herself out of bed and into a job. She can't ponce off you forever. What are her plans for the future?

bltchef

my friend say i should go. if i ask her to get out of bed it cause upset in the home and i have enough to do with major fights as well my partner has cpn she is well suported but is never
egough

daska

It sounds to me as if you need help. If you're having to keep an eye on your partner because she's at risk of committing suicide then that makes you a 'carer' and SS have a duty of care towards you. The fact that this has been going on for 8 years suggests that nothing will be sorted out unless you start shouting from the rooftops. I suggest you ring SS. If you are unable or unwilling to go on caring then they will have to do an assessment and put whatever the outcome decides is necessary in place.

Have you had any contact with the local carer support groups?

mags2109

You are under a great deal of stress yourself. I dare say your partner is getting some type of help because her suicide attempts have ended in her being hospitalised on occasions.

What support are YOU getting?

My guess is you' re getting none or very little. If you choose to stay you have to make time for yourself and do things outside the home for your own relaxation and well being. There are carer groups, phone your local council and ask about these.

It sounds like your partner has a long term mental health problem, ask about disability living allowance for her and carers allowance for yourself...your local council will have a welfare rights worker who will help you claim these things if you aren't already getting them.