Group hug desparately needed!

bailey59

Thanks again for your kind words.

hermum, we have one car, I currently walk to work but that may change depending if I get another job out of walking distance, i cook from scratch, we never eat processes food, we dont have a tumble drier, and our joint monthly income is 2400, 1600 ish goes on direct debts (including money to CCCS for our DMP) if I lose my job (1100 per month) and I dont get another before I get pregnant I think we will be in a mess.

It doesnt look good for us does it? Thankfully DH is very supportive so we are together in this.

solventsoon

Hi Bailey
I can't give you any advice but I really feel for you. Hope your bosses get your redundancy payment sorted out. Luckily you sound as though you have a really supportive DH, so you have each other and you're in the right place now to have a rant/moan/cry/kick up the *** as needed..

Take care and have a huge hug from me.
ss
x

hermum

bailey59 wrote: »

Thanks again for your kind words.

hermum, we have one car, I currently walk to work but that may change depending if I get another job out of walking distance, i cook from scratch, we never eat processes food, we dont have a tumble drier, and our joint monthly income is 2400, 1600 ish goes on direct debts (including money to CCCS for our DMP) if I lose my job (1100 per month) and I dont get another before I get pregnant I think we will be in a mess.

It doesnt look good for us does it? Thankfully DH is very supportive so we are together in this.

You're doing everything you already can aren't you. have you ebayed, maybe you could try & earn a living on there, not easy, but it does still seem doable. Especially if you've a hobby or interest that hasn't already saturated the market.
All the very best

dalleDF

Hi Bailey. First to say, I really sympathise with your situation and I really hope things get better for you. But I wanted to also say I disagree with some of the things other people that have posted so far.

I read that the average cost of raising a baby is almost £9k in the first year. Granted, you can reduce this by using hand me downs and the support of your family, but babies turn into children and children are also very expensive to raise. Love is not enough, unfortunately.

The other issue is that you would be bringing a child into a household which is under strain due to debt burden you are carrying, and uncertainty about yours and your partner's jobs, and the future in general. Judging by your posts, you are feeling really low and under a lot of stress. I'm not saying this would rub off on your child, but speaking as someone who grew up in a household with serious money worries (including visits from bailiffs), children are very attuned to things like this and will pick up on whatever is stressing out mummy and daddy.

You say you are desperate for a baby, but don't you think it is a bit selfish to bring another life into the world when you are already in a precarious financial situation? Plenty of women are able to have children into their 40s, and failing that, there are plenty of children out there waiting to be adopted. Biological parenthood isn't the be all and end all.

My advice would be to think of pregnancy as the ultimate incentive to do everything you can to get back on track, although of course some of it is out of your control. Anyway, I'm not trying to be horrible, I really do feel for you and I wish you the best of luck. Just wanted to give an alternative viewpoint. Hope things turn around for you.