MSE Parents Club Part 10

got-it-spend-it

money_maker wrote: »

aww poor ed losing his sophie and poor you for paying all that money and letting him lose it Hopefully someone nice might hand it in

wi3adora wrote: »

Thanks x Uhm not quite but some act that age (no offence to anyone with a very nice 13yr old ) it's more the ones who are a size 0 who can wear whatever they want and it looks good mainly the ones who haven't had children so don't have extra lumps and bumps where they don't normally!
I mean who has time in a morning to put extensions in and curl all their hair, full make up and be wearing the latest fashion when you've got a baby? Or is it just me??

Definitely not just you Dora! If we have to be anywhere before 10 I just put my hair up.

weezl74

got-it-spend-it wrote: »

Weezl- I think you should put it in your birth plan about BF. Have you been able to discuss it with anyone this pg? I know we've talked at length about traumatic births on here, and the need to talk them through with someone. Could it br for you that the whole BF thing was maybe the traumatic part and that it would help to talk it through ahead of Kester's birth? Just a thought (and probably not a very useful one but it is before 7am)! Hugs to you anyway.

thanks GISI :A sorry you have a poorly throat. Take it easy today.

I've talked to my brother and to DH... they aren't the most touchy feely of chaps. Their advice was very practical though.

Part of me would like to share it on here, but I also feel that the internet is a prime place for misunderstanding and feelings running high. A lot of my stuff is about how much I beat myself up about not BFing Ferg. In my head I know I didn't do an awful thing, probably just a less than ideal thing. But in my feelings, I did a bad thing.

The problem with expressing that feeling on here though, is that others who have also FF could easily feel that if I judge myself harshly for not BF, then maybe I feel that way towards them, ie judgemental (I genuinely don't and have asked myself searchingly that question).

Anyhow, it feels a bit precarious to launch into that because as I think I've said before on here, but I think while you were still over on the other thread :rotfl:I really value and like the support and friendship on here, so I don't often say in case I lose you all.

Does any of that make any sense GISI?

Really must go stock up on coke and peanuts now!

got-it-spend-it

Oh Weezl, you're such a sweetie always thinking about the feelings of others. I totally understand where you're coming from. I really meant could you speak to a MW about your feelings about BFing, as well as your physiological reasons etc but do it ahead of the birth so don't feel you have to explain yourself (not that anyone should have to) when you've just given birth and at your most vulnerable.

In other milk news* I have accidentally cancelled our milkman delivery today so OH will not be terribly impressed when he gets up!

*Hopes Weezl doesn't mind me lightening the mood and realises I am in no way trying to trivialise the above troubles.

Becles

Sami_Bee wrote: »

Becles - thanks for the graze code :kisses3: got my 1st box today, I love it
I now have codes too if anyone wants? x

Pleased you liked it. I get the nibble one and they've been yummy so far.

I've still got more codes if anyone wants one - first box free, second box half price.

money_maker wrote: »

I found out last week that the little boy in Jasmines class who doesnt speak very well or very often is autistic, which we never knew, and only found out because he hit the teacher and threw chairs across the classroom.
Now, I have no issue at all of him being in Jasmines class, he has every right to be there, but apparently he has had violent outbursts in school several times and a few of the other kids are quite scared of him. Jas sits at the other side of the classroom, so doesnt seem too bothered by it and that is why she never mentioned it to me, as thats just the way he has always been, but I am now slightly concerned. Does that make me sound like a really bad person ??

There was a boy like that in Josh's class but he had a special needs teacher sitting with him at all times. He did have violent outbursts but he was taken out of class if he got too bad. Sadly the autism got worse and he was having too many outbursts for the school to cope with, so they had to work with his Mam and get him into a special school.

He was a lovely bairn when he wasn't having an outburst. Josh had a party and I felt awful inviting the whole class but not this particular boy. Other parents were all "ooh you must be brave inviting K" as nobody else invited him to stuff. It was a traditional party with party games and then a buffet. On the day his Grandad brought him and he managed to join in a few games and he was very well behaved. It started getting a bit too noisy for him, so he wanted to go early. We hadn't eaten by then, but I gave him a plate and helped him pick some goodies to take home for his tea. He was absolutely over the moon because he'd been to a party and his Mam said he talked about it for days - bless him!

Bathroom plans have changed again now. There's a false wall behind the toilet as it used to be a seperate toilet and bathroom. Going to investigate knocking the false wall out and moving the toilet back to make a more square shaped room.

I'm thinking about cancelling the milk delivery. Prices have just gone up again and the 4pt cartons of milk are often on a 2 for £3 offer in supermarkets. I'm in supermarkets most days for work, so it's no hassle to buy milk after a job. I just feel guilty telling the lady we don't want milk anymore

weezl74

got-it-spend-it wrote: »

*Hopes Weezl doesn't mind me lightening the mood and realises I am in no way trying to trivialise the above troubles.

:rotfl:excellent!

would DH like some of fergie's SMA for his morning cuppa?

weezl74

Becles wrote: »

I'm thinking about cancelling the milk delivery. Prices have just gone up again and the 4pt cartons of milk are often on a 2 for £3 offer in supermarkets. I'm in supermarkets most days for work, so it's no hassle to buy milk after a job. I just feel guilty telling the lady we don't want milk anymore

becles do you have a costco? we make back our yearly card cost in just 10 weeks of milk, let alone all the other bargains

Will your nice plumber move the loo and soil pipe?
xx

SugarSpun

money_maker wrote: »

I found out last week that the little boy in Jasmines class who doesnt speak very well or very often is autistic, which we never knew, and only found out because he hit the teacher and threw chairs across the classroom.... I am now slightly concerned. Does that make me sound like a really bad person ??

No, autism can be hard to deal with if you're not used to dealing with it IYSWIM. It sounds like he had a bad day - but an isolated one if everyone's talking about it.

weezl74 wrote: »

I didn't want them to go away quicker, just I couldn't handle the BF thing. It's a great shame because they just lurk so they can do all those really helpful things like checking your latch etc, but to me it was very difficult. But I wanted them to stay so I could ask questions about looking after him...

DH wants me to put that in my birth plan (not to talk to me about BF). I'm too scared though! I don't want to do anything that might alienate them when I need them so much and mine and Kester's lives are in their hands.

Would you feel comfortable talking to them ahead of time? I'm sorry it's such a worry for you :grouphug:

Happy birthday scruffy!

Poor Ed losing his Sophie! Maybe someone will hand it in?

Good luck with the grumpy baby chopsticks... I've got a smiley quiet one here but who knows how long it'll last?!

Becles

weezl74 wrote: »

becles do you have a costco? we make back our yearly card cost in just 10 weeks of milk, let alone all the other bargains

There's one past the Metrocentre but I've never been before. I just thought it was like Makro and you needed to be a business to get in?

Supermarket stuff is convenient I don't mind paying a few pence more, to save the time and expense of travelling elsewhere. I'm sure nobody else micro-analyses journeys as much as I do

Will your nice plumber move the loo and soil pipe?
xx

I can do that myself to save costs :money:Already planning to move the bath taps and waste. Flexible pipes and compression joints make plumbing easy

Could have probably done the radiator myself, but I would have had to drain the system to do it slowly and then pay for inhibitors and stuff to fill it back up. Was better paying for someone to do it, as he did it quick and just lined the void with black sacks to catch the drips while he whipped the old one off and put the new one on.

SusanC_2

hammyhunter wrote: »

DH often works from home and since LO was born he does nearly all the cooking and cleaning! He says it is my job to bring David up which is far more important than housework so he wants to help as much as possible .

My OH did the cooking for about the first six months after Alice was born and a large proportion of the house work. The amount of time I was feeding Alice in the first three months was almost as much as the time he spent working and then as she started to feed less and I had more time I gradually took over. I actually almost had to fight him over some of the jobs because he'd got so used to doing everything when I was pregnant that he would just go ahead and do my jobs instead of doing the things that only he could do. He considers it all to be a joint effort so if he's finished and I've still got stuff to do still then he'll willingly help.

Becles wrote: »

Went for desserts and decided to let Charlotte have a slab of chocolate fudge cake thinking she wouldn't eat it all. She did. Big mistake! It's taken ages to get her into bed this evening as she is hyper. I tucked her in and went in the shower and when I came out, she was bouncing around on the landing with the dogs and singing a song about gingerbread men :rotfl:

I wonder what Alice's excuse is - she's often like that but without the cake. (Belated Happy Birthday to James.)

Sami_Bee wrote: »

yes it is but I'm not sure what happens when there is no BFing and no syno-wotsit jab

I didn't have the jab and ALice didn't feed for 24 hours and I was fine, I think it's just that there's a greater likelyhood of PPH - not that you would definitely have it.

money_maker wrote: »

I found out last week that the little boy in Jasmines class who doesnt speak very well or very often is autistic, which we never knew, and only found out because he hit the teacher and threw chairs across the classroom.
Now, I have no issue at all of him being in Jasmines class, he has every right to be there, but apparently he has had violent outbursts in school several times and a few of the other kids are quite scared of him. Jas sits at the other side of the classroom, so doesnt seem too bothered by it and that is why she never mentioned it to me, as thats just the way he has always been, but I am now slightly concerned. Does that make me sound like a really bad person ??

You do get "normal" children dong that kind of thing from time to time too. Have the outbursts ever been directed at anyone or are the children who are scared just frightened by witnessing him getting angry? Is the child concerned or the ones who are scared newer to the school? I would have expected that if they were used to his behaviour they would not be bothered by it. If you are concerned, I'm sure the teracher would be quite happy for you to speak to her about it and she may well be able to reassure you.

weezl74 wrote: »

Re: lotus birth (I had to google it ) wow! amazing! I was trying to remember how long fergie's cord stayed on and with us it was 7-8 days IIRC. I guess a lot of it for me would be about how many friends/family would be expecting to meet/play with him/join in with stuff like nappy changes/baths etc.... and how it'd be to do with how weird they found it that they were cuddling a baby plus placenta, IYSWIM?

Plus (I feel a bit materialistic for thinking this-selfish mummy ) I also had a pang of 'oh I can't get him dressed and pop out to Ikea for a family trip with Fergus' (and get those endless being stopped and asked about him by women in their 50s that you get when you take a newborn out with you- and you feel like a minor celebrity for a few weeks ). I can't get my head round how you'd put a newborn and the placenta in a sling/baby carrier. And what clothes would he wear? See I'm just not very practical!:rotfl:

So why am I saying this-just to ask I suppose if you also would feel the loss of those things, or maybe they're not actually out of the question and I hadn't thought of it!

We didn't do all those things in the first few days anyway (and the placenta gives you a better excuse not to ). Alice was born on the Tuesday, we went home on the Wednesday, my mum and brother turned up (unarranged - it was a bit of a shock) on the Saturday, BIL visited briefly on the Monday (this had been arranged before Alice was born, he lives a long way away and was passing by), mum and brother visited again the following Saturday (but this time they told us) and then on the Sunday (so 12 days old) we went to church, friends for Sunday lunch and then church again. You can transport baby in the car - you just have to make sure you have the placenta in an appropriate position and for clothing you would use clothes that have openings in the appropriate place (so T-shirts and babygrows rather than vests and babygrows). Not sure that a sling would be practical though.

On the breastfeeding, it might be worth discussing it with your midwife beforehand and definitely either put something about it in your birthplan or ask OH to have a quiet word about it so that you don't end up feeling all stressed/pressurised about it atthe time.

weezl74

Becles wrote: »

There's one past the Metrocentre but I've never been before. I just thought it was like Makro and you needed to be a business to get in?

There are also a list of jobs/professions you can be to get in.

You get 2 cards so you could split membership costs with a local friend?

Meddlesome thought..... doesn't susan's OH have a small business? :rotfl: