Little one wetting bed but refusing nappies

mrcow

princessleah_ wrote: »

Can you not put a nappy on him once he is asleep? I have regularly changed children's nappies whilst they are sleeping so that they don't soak all the way through. If he is able to take a nappy off then put a pull up on him or put all in one pyjamas on backwards (you will have to cut the feet off) but he will not be able to get them off.

But what does the child learn by doing that?

"If I put my foot down, I'll get my own way."

It is NOT a constructive lesson to be teaching any child.

wornoutmumoftwo

I understand how determined a wee one can be but I think you're putting a lot of work on yourself by allowing him to not wear a nappy. My boy was dry at night from about 3, but he wouldn't use a toilet when he was awake until 5 and 1/2 (but that's another story).

I think you need to explain to your son that until he is dry at night that he will need to wear something in bed. This could be done as a social story, (just make a story up about a little boy who didn't want to wear a nappy but had to etc etc).

Also you could look at why he doesn't want to wear nappies, (is it because he doesn't need them in the day? Are they too tight? Uncomfortable? Does it make him feel like a baby?

Or you could let him go to sleep and then slip one on him?

Apricot

mrcow wrote: »

But what does the child learn by doing that?

"If I put my foot down, I'll get my own way."

It is NOT a constructive lesson to be teaching any child.

I agree it is not a constructive lesson to teach the child but, it solves a problem for the OP. If she has not forced the child to put nappies on for a while it will take a while to get the child back into the habit.

In the short term this will work allowing her to sleep a whole night through.

jamespir

what about those new dry nights shorts things they advertise he wouldnt know thyre nappies because they dont looke like them and unless his albert einstein at 2 years old would think they were shorts

Mini_Bear

My mum used to put tights on my brother (over his night nappy) becuase he wet the bed and hated wearin nappies at about 3 years old.
there was no negotiation on this, my mum was firm but fair. she made such a fuss one day when he had sprayed his entire bedroom with wee that he just meekly agreed! it worked and he was dry evey nite within 6 months.

mrcow

princessleah_ wrote: »

I agree it is not a constructive lesson to teach the child but, it solves a problem for the OP. If she has not forced the child to put nappies on for a while it will take a while to get the child back into the habit.

In the short term this will work allowing her to sleep a whole night through.

I'm sorry I disagree.

If the child has a personality where they won't be told (which many of us have btw!) then what she needs to do is give him a choice.

Set out two bedtime sets of clothes.

One contains a baby suit and a nappy.

One contains a set of night pants and pyjamas.

The child then gets to choose which he wants to wear. There are two choices. That's it. Either way - there has to be compliance. You can't let something like this be dictated to you.

At this point, tell him that if there is any fussing or bother, then he's straight in the nappy and baby suit. And make a deal with him. If he can do it for a whole week with the night pants being dry, then he gets to wear just pjs to bed.

Note: If you are using pull-ups or the like, then stiull put a disposable mattress cover under the sheet as there can still be leakage.

joesaunt

My sister in law roughly stitched a pair of pull ups into a pair of "big boy" pants. Worked a treat.

xmaslolly76

mrcow wrote: »

Set out two bedtime sets of clothes.

One contains a baby suit and a nappy.

One contains a set of night pants and pyjamas.

I have to agree with this a child should not be dictating what will happen when its causing so much distress to both parent and child. This option still allows for the parent to get what they want whilst the child still feels like a big boy instead of a baby.

Raggs_2

mrcow wrote: »

But what does the child learn by doing that?

"If I put my foot down, I'll get my own way."

It is NOT a constructive lesson to be teaching any child.

I cannot claim any experience in this realm, so please take my comments with a pinch of salt. But at the moment I'd said that's precisely the lesson the child is currently learning. He's putting his foot down, and succeeding in not wearing nappies.

mrcow

Raggs wrote: »

I cannot claim any experience in this realm, so please take my comments with a pinch of salt. But at the moment I'd said that's precisely the lesson the child is currently learning. He's putting his foot down, and succeeding in not wearing nappies.

You're 100% right.

On face value it may seem like a small thing - but this type of assertion can spread to other areas. I'm always saying on these forums (and elsewhere!) that it's all about control. Who has control here?

It's the child.

A two year old dictating terms to an adult is not the way to be bringing them up. Children want and need boundaries. They need rules. They need to know that you are in charge and that you are going to be fair and kind in the process of enforcing them.

Otherwise, bedlam prevails.

How else are they going to get a feeling of security?