partner left on monday....mixed emotions

sillybillyme

hi karen_30 thanks for your reply im sorry you went through getting hurt but im glad it worked out for you in the end. dont take this the wrong way but its nice to hear from people who are going through the same thing and seeing how they have moved on one way or the other (its not nice that other people are going through this i just mean its nice to see people can move forwards with their life and i wont feel like this forever)

i feel really tired today, i didnt sleep properly last night and i feel so miserable. i took the boys to school and got home and just wanted to cry. im trying hard not to tho as if i start i might not stop!!!!

im going to have a good tidy up before i go to the job centre this afternoon so i can just pick the boys up from school and relax!!!! wishfull thinking i know!!!

thankyou for all your replies it really does help. xx

Michelin

sillybillyme wrote: »

hi karen_30 thanks for your reply im sorry you went through getting hurt but im glad it worked out for you in the end. dont take this the wrong way but its nice to hear from people who are going through the same thing and seeing how they have moved on one way or the other (its not nice that other people are going through this i just mean its nice to see people can move forwards with their life and i wont feel like this forever)

i feel really tired today, i didnt sleep properly last night and i feel so miserable. i took the boys to school and got home and just wanted to cry. im trying hard not to tho as if i start i might not stop!!!!

im going to have a good tidy up before i go to the job centre this afternoon so i can just pick the boys up from school and relax!!!! wishfull thinking i know!!!

thankyou for all your replies it really does help. xx

Believe me, there are plenty of us on here to give each other support with advice or just be around for a chat.

Crying is good - it gets it out and is a very normal emotion when you are going through something like this. I know it is difficult but try and focus on doing something small like tidying up - anything to keep you busy.

Are you still in contact with each other at the moment?

Karen_30

sillybillyme wrote: »

hi karen_30 thanks for your reply im sorry you went through getting hurt but im glad it worked out for you in the end. dont take this the wrong way but its nice to hear from people who are going through the same thing and seeing how they have moved on one way or the other (its not nice that other people are going through this i just mean its nice to see people can move forwards with their life and i wont feel like this forever)

i feel really tired today, i didnt sleep properly last night and i feel so miserable. i took the boys to school and got home and just wanted to cry. im trying hard not to tho as if i start i might not stop!!!!

im going to have a good tidy up before i go to the job centre this afternoon so i can just pick the boys up from school and relax!!!! wishfull thinking i know!!!

thankyou for all your replies it really does help. xx

It's only natural you will cry and it's best to let it all out - trust me!

I totally understand what you mean re hearing from people who have been through similar experiences, the support is amazing. No matter what happens you will be fine but just take some time out and make sure you look after youself.

Take care x

sillybillyme

Michelin wrote: »

Believe me, there are plenty of us on here to give each other support with advice or just be around for a chat.

Crying is good - it gets it out and is a very normal emotion when you are going through something like this. I know it is difficult but try and focus on doing something small like tidying up - anything to keep you busy.

Are you still in contact with each other at the moment?

hi michelin
i have been trying to keep busy today and feel a lot better then this morning which is good. i have not spoke to him since wednesday, i dont want to ring him about seeing the kids im sure he will do this in his own time. my eldest has got a swimming lesson tomorrow morning so i dont know whether he wil be in contact about that just have to wait and see i suppose.

sillybillyme

Karen_30 wrote: »

It's only natural you will cry and it's best to let it all out - trust me!

I totally understand what you mean re hearing from people who have been through similar experiences, the support is amazing. No matter what happens you will be fine but just take some time out and make sure you look after youself.

Take care x

im glad it didnt come across the wrong way!!! it seems easier chatting to people this way as when the kids are in bed i can have a wander around the site and have a bit of a moan!!!

thanks again xx

MrsTinks

Ok... many years ago (roughly your age...) I went back... now on the one hand I'm glad I did because I was eventually left with NO doubt in my mind that we were not meant to be and I haven't spent years of my life wondering "what if". On the other hand I wonder if I wouldn't have worked that out without wasting nearly another year of my life with him?

I think more than anything I was scared of being alone - once I realised I could cope without him I stopped looking back. I set myself a goal for the first time in my life of earning at least as many thousands of pounds a year as my age is - so £25K at 25 etc... I'm happy to tell you that once I had a target to work towards I did VERY well And I'm ahead of my target at 30
I love my now husband to pieces, and my baby DD - but I also know that should DH one day leave me then I can "do it on my own" - I have him in my life because I want him, NOT because I need him

I can manage my daughter and my career and I can cope without a man. I don't want to but I can and I think that's made me a MUCH easier person to live with because I have no fear of asking him to do the dishes, to bath our daughter, to lend me a hand with something (never the cooking - I like eating edible food LOL) and he rarely grumbles about it either (He's a bloke... I don't expect miracles like unprompted washing! )

Give yourself time and prove to yourself that you can cope just find without him - that way if you take him back you do so because you WANT to, not because you're scared of being on your own etc

sillybillyme

i still have not heard from him and im getting relly fed up with it now. i dont understand how he can act like this when he has children. his mum is coming round tomorrow so i might tell her exactly how i feel and how selfish he is being.

if i were to stop him seeing his kids i would be classed as cruel and selfish etc but it seems to be ok for him to just up and leave and not bother. i feel really hurt for my kids today but im hopeing soon that the hurt will turn to nothing and i will probably pitty him more for missing out on his kiddies.
xx

sunshine_shell

Don't stop him seeing the kids, leave it to him to make his choices and don't moan at his mum either, because she will then moan at him and he will feel 'forced' into doing it.

Focus on being a great mum and doing family time things and set yourself goals every week and try and complete them. Once you have yourself sorted he will see what he is missing and you will be strong enough to know if you need him or want him around

Jo_R_2

Hey, was wondering if he'd been in touch this afternoon after you last posted?

Hope you're doing okay x

sillybillyme

sunshine_shell wrote: »

Don't stop him seeing the kids, leave it to him to make his choices and don't moan at his mum either, because she will then moan at him and he will feel 'forced' into doing it.

Focus on being a great mum and doing family time things and set yourself goals every week and try and complete them. Once you have yourself sorted he will see what he is missing and you will be strong enough to know if you need him or want him around

hi, i would never ever stop him seeing the kids as i would not want to hurt them and im just not that sort of person, i think i may of put it across wrong i just meant that if he was asking to see the kids and i kept saying no everyone would say that is wrong to stop the kids seeing their dad but he can not contact me even to ask how they are and it obviously does not even bother him. hope that makes more sense!!!