How do I cope with interfering Neighbours ?

misty

What a horrible thing for you to experience. One thing I wondered was the incident with your husband and the smashed plate. You said that happened indoors - so presumably there would be a very limited number of people who could hear that? I would contact a solictor as well as the police. I sometimes think the police are for whatever reason slow to react to this type of thing. If you got a solictor to write to the police requesting any info they have at the moment e.g the call that was made - they must know what call box it came from and would help regarding opportunity to use it. Don't get too hung up on who you suspect it may not be them - if you make any allegations and these prove to be false you make look like you're the one with the grudge.

I would also get the solictor to contact social services and request any info they have - they won't give nay names if indeed there are any but they could provide times and more accurate details of what was said.

The reason I think you should do this is because you will then have everything under one umbrella.

Re the school - I would go in again and ask them to put in writing that although your son was accused - they accept he was out of the country at the time. Explain to them that you feel there is a situation going on and ask them or whoever is in charge of your son's pastoral care to keep an eye on him and his feelings. Even if you don't feel this is necessary, it will show them you are being proactive.

Lastly, I would limit who I would tell about what has happened - just your most trusted friends and relatives. the more people that know, the more people could inadvertantly pass on info that could be used to upset you back to the person who is causing this.

Remember, you have done nothing wrong. Try not to agonise over what you might have done to cause this. They are the one with the problem.
Hopefully they will trip themselves up very soon.

tee_pee_2

Dazzieboo did you or your son get an apology from the school after being falsely accussed? Did you tell the school your son wasn't in school that day.

Dazzieboo

Yes, the school was very quick to apologise when they realised the error. So many children had told the Deputy Head who it was, that she felt it must have been true, it didn't occur to her to mention it to the form teacher at the meeting after school. As for the footie jacket, the Manager told me he knew it wasn't my Son, I thanked him for that and said in that case, how about he told the rest of the team it to stop speculation. Grrrrr.

My Son has just come back after going around a friends to play and he wasn't allowed in the house, he told my Son his Mum doesn't agree with the way he is being bought up. I think a little secret has just been slipped out.
Out of the mouths of babes ????

looby75

Dazzieboo wrote:

My Son has just come back after going around a friends to play and he wasn't allowed in the house, he told my Son his Mum doesn't agree with the way he is being bought up. I think a little secret has just been slipped out.
Out of the mouths of babes ????

It definitely sounds as though your sons friend's parents have issues with you would it be at all worth confronting them? Not to accuse them of anything (not directly at least ) but maybe you could mention their son's comments and that you are quite concerned about them and just want to clear the air.

Mumstheword

The best form of revenge to someone wanting to spoil your life is to be happy!

And make sure they see you living a happy life!

mishkanorman

Hello,
firstly I would like to say I think you are great for still being sane, it would have tipped me a long time ago !!

Secondly, and if im way off the mark and upset you im sorry in advance , but have you considered the possibilty its your daughter doing this ?? The reason i say is the incidents all seem to be quite specific in the details, things only a family member would know. Divorce can be hard on kids, add to that just general growing up and school maybe she is attention seeking.

Anyway I would definately go to the police, its harrasment who ever is behind it and im sure they dont want their time wasted my someone who clearly needs some help.

mishka

Dazzieboo

Just a quick update.

Following on from the Police visit, I had a phone call from the school saying they had received a complaint from a parent saying I was abusive and violent to my child and they had to report it to social services. I phoned SS the next day and told them I felt it was a malicious call and could we have a meeting asap to discuss it. The SW who came out was the same one who came out at Christmas and explained why she was there, it soon became apparent, that the person who made the complaint to the Police was so angry at the way the Police had handled it, they took the complaint to school.

Today, I found out, the person who made the complaint had asked a neighbour of theirs to be a witness and she refused saying she was not there when I shouted at my Son so would be no part of it, she was ignored and named as a witness anyway. She was so angry, she told me who made the complaint.

So at least I now know who is on my back. Tomorrow the Police are coming round so I can put in my harrasment case and every small detail will be entered. Although I know who it is, the Police will not accept it without proof, but once I have entered the case, they can gain the name from SS.

And yes, it is the same person who I thought it was.

bert&ernie

Just caught up with this thread. Seems that this person has be waging a concerted campaign of harassment against you. I hope the police take your complaint seriously and prosecute this person to the full extent of the law - what they have done to you is quite outrageous and they should be brought to book.

The police should be able to find all the proof they need once they lodge your complaint. If they investigate properly, they should be able to tie it all together into a solid case. If it were me I would also take some legal advice for two reasons:

1. To put pressure on the police and other authorities to take my complaint seriously. They may also have acted improperly in the way the complaints were handled i.e. should they have realised that the complaints were malicious and done something about it?
2. To explore the possibility of a civil case against the individual and/or the authorities.

I really do hope you can put a stop to all of this and get some proper redress for what has happened. Please do let us know how you get on.

Doozergirl

Dazzieboo, I've only just read your story and am horrified by what you have been put through. I'm glad you've found out who it is; rise above it all and don't let them see you hurt or angry, but please follow it through the correct channels as far as you can and ensure they get their due.

There must be something very wrong with that individual.

*Louise*

OMG - i am so shocked at what you have been put through!!

Some people are so vicious, I have no idea how you have stayed sane.

Well, now you know who it was (do you know why they did it yet?) I hope you take the case for harassment as far as it can go.


Hopefully after this you will be left to live in peace.

((((hugs))))