Daughter cant talk

tiamai_d

Signs are fine, but you must remember they are a language AID, not a language. You have to say the word everytime you use the sing, and encourage her to say the word, even if it is just a sound that sounds like the word (caaaa for car, even just aaaa will do to start).

As for the big sis, make it into a game. All sit down and try to say something in signs, made up or otherwise. Even doing actions. Each person takes a turn. Make big sis 'helper', buy encouraging little sis to make the sounds. gobbledegook is fine so long as it sounds like what it is supposed to be. Later on it is the SALT (if needed) job to then develop the sounds into words.

julie03

my nephew didnt say a word till he was well past 3 just pointed and grunted. he is 21 now and is perfectly ok , i think if they can understand what you are saying that is more important

DVardysShadow

A relevant article I saw earlier today:

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/features/we-just-want-lucy-to-talk-to-us-1864771.html

elektra-2007

Do you have a sure start centre near you? They can fast track hearing and speech therepy, I know coz they did for my boy. I cant say it helped much because his hearing was fine and about 4 he just started talking.
What is she like away from you and her Sister. e.g when with grandparents alone. It could well be she dosent need to speak if you have a drink ready for her all the time, she wont need to ask. Do you ask her questions all the time without knowing, i.e
would you like a drink/crisps/biscuit/apple/nap/ect?
it can be easy for siblings and parents to talk or guess little one needs, try listening to what you and dd1 say to her for a couple of days, and even if you know she wants somthing try to resist giving her to encorage her to ask. Thats what I was told a few years ago.

weenickieS

Thanks alot, you have all really reasured me and i feel alot less stressed about it.

DVardysShadow

weenickieS wrote: »

She is not stupid and quite bright. Understands everything i say to her. i ask her to do something and she will do it. She tried to have conversations but its all gobblydegoop. Its like she knows what she is saying in her head but its not coming out that way.

Have confidence, then. Maybe Steven Pinker's book "The language instinct" will be helpful in understanding the development of language. Not a child rearing book by any means, but it may help you understand what you see.

weenickieS wrote: »

She uses a little sign language as she has been watching mr tumble. I was worried this might stop her wanting to learn to talk since we understand her when signing.

...

I used to just agree with what she was trying to tell me but then realised this wasnt going to help her. Now i get her to repeat what she is saying, i then say it slowly for her to repeat again. It helps a little but not a great deal.

...

Her ears were tested as a baby and they were fine. They have never been tested since but she does seem to hear very well and doesnt look as though she is having trouble hearing.

Sign language is a natural language development among non hearing children - but I think you are right, your daughter is hearing OK. Deaf children do it because there is some impediment to spoken communication - in their case hearing. This may be very much in common with your daughter - in her case, you seem fairly sure she knows what she is saying in her head

I think that you are doing a really important thing by not just agreeing with whatever she says, but by trying to understand and expressing it yourself. Not sure whether a great deal of effort to get her to repeat it is worth while

tiamai_d wrote: »

Signs are fine, but you must remember they are a language AID, not a language. You have to say the word everytime you use the sing, and encourage her to say the word, even if it is just a sound that sounds like the word (caaaa for car, even just aaaa will do to start).

As for the big sis, make it into a game. All sit down and try to say something in signs, made up or otherwise. Even doing actions. Each person takes a turn. Make big sis 'helper', buy encouraging little sis to make the sounds. gobbledegook is fine so long as it sounds like what it is supposed to be. Later on it is the SALT (if needed) job to then develop the sounds into words.

I would disagree about signs not being a language. Pinker is quite convincing that they can form a language - signs are a natural outlet for language where speech does not work. Pinker also states it is quite natural in certain circumstances for children to develop their own language - and is normal even when there are no adults present in the long term.

The bothersome thing about what Pinker says is that children who are isolated for the years where language develops thereafter lose the ability to acquire language. But children who have developed or acquired a first language can fairly easily acquire other languages. So in your shoes, I would be really cautious about trying to swing the communication away from signs to speech, although I would not neglect speech to her by any means.

osian

My nephew was the same - did not say many words til three, though it was obvious he could undertand things perfectly well. Then all of a sudden just started talking as if he had been bottling it up for all that time. He's five now and the same as any other child.

Smiley_Mum

My eldest son didn't start speaking much until he went to nursery, a few words but no phrases etc. The doctor had me see a specialist at the local hospital as she said he had a tongue tie...

http://www.babycentre.co.uk/baby/health/tonguetie/?_requestid=3328767

The specialist that I saw at the hospital was totally perplexed when he examined my son as he had no tongue tie and couldn't understand why he was referred. My son was 2 and a half at the time and wasn't speaking much. He missed a lot of nursery and went to pre-school for several months. A lot of health professionals were on my case to take my son for further checks etc. I started to get quite worried about everything, but in the end his speech came on fine. I know it's easy for me to say but try not to get too worried about your little one. They get you (Docs, HVs etc) in such a flap and panic. Try not to let it get to you.

These days if your child doesn't fit into the stats that are in their charts, for height, weight, speaking, walking, etc etc then "there's something wrong". Every child is different, some do things early, some later, much later. My youngest didn't start walking until he was 19 months old and everyone was going nuts about that too. Nothing wrong with him. Hope it all comes good for you and your wee one.

Lunar_Eclipse

DVardysShadow wrote: »

A relevant article I saw earlier today:

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/features/we-just-want-lucy-to-talk-to-us-1864771.html

I actually think that article would worry me slightly, although there is only so much you can do and many children are late talkers. Having said that, early language skills can be a huge advantage and as such, I would do all I could to help them develop.

I would concentrate on making a huge effort to emmerse her in language and entice her to talk. I wouldn't encourage sign language if you think her hearing is fine. I would push for a speech and language assessment, talk to her as much as possible and try to get her to communicate for herself.

I would not speak back to her in goddlygoop, but perhaps respond with questions such as "did you just say your dolly would like some apple juice?", "what are you enjoying playing?" etc. Eventually she is likely to reply and in the meantime you will be expanding her vocabulary.

Reading to her, audio books, quality 1:1 time etc should all help.

tiamai_d

DVardysShadow wrote: »

I would disagree about signs not being a language. Pinker is quite convincing that they can form a language - signs are a natural outlet for language where speech does not work. Pinker also states it is quite natural in certain circumstances for children to develop their own language - and is normal even when there are no adults present in the long term.

I was talking about Makaton which has been designed as a language aid as opposed to BSL which is a language in it's own right. I'd mentioned that in a previous post and was adding to it.