Changing name by deed poll instead of getting married?

flower24

I'm thinking about changing my title to Mrs and my surname to my partners surname. We have two children together and would love to be married but can't afford it, and tbh I don't know if I could be bothered to plan it all anyway.

I want to have the same name as my partner and our children.

So has anybody done this? And do you wear a wedding ring and call each other husband and wife even though you're not technically married? For me the changing of my name would be a statement of my love and commitment to him.

msb5262

You say you "would love to be married but can't afford it"

How much does it cost to get married?

As far as I can see, it costs less than £100 to get married.

If this is what you want, save up and do it.

Or do you mean that you want to have a wedding?

These two things are not the same!

Bear in mind that if you are not married, you and your partner do not automatically have the same rights as if you were married...

MsB

McKneff

Planning, what planning, ring the registry office, turn up, marry, go home. Job done.
Probably cheaper than changing by deed poll and probably easier. (think of all those forms you would have to fill in, all the admin it entails.)



Do you rent a home, do you own a home, have you made wills, it all maeks a difference when you die and one day you will.
Much easier to administer anyones estate if they are married.

hot.chick

Doesn't it cost money to get your name changed???

couldn't you do a registry office do - just the family?

Just wondered if not being married would cause complications much later down the line, unmarried couples don't have the same rights a entitlements as married ones do.

Sorry - nothing usefull to add, I'm a marriage fan - and I love being my husbands wife :j

Good luck what ever you decide to do x

Sucker_for_sweeties

immynjoesmum wrote: »

I'm thinking about changing my title to Mrs and my surname to my partners surname. We have two children together and would love to be married but can't afford it, and tbh I don't know if I could be bothered to plan it all anyway.

Would it not cost around the same either way....with no wedding day trimmings just the legal bit it's probably not much more than whatever fee (there's sure to be one:rolleyes:) the deed poll will cost. Really not much more planning either.....without all the usual folderol associated with 'the big day'.


I want to have the same name as my partner and our children.

So has anybody done this? And do you wear a wedding ring and call each other husband and wife even though you're not technically married? For me the changing of my name would be a statement of my love and commitment to him.

I call lots of my mates bidey-in's the husband (or more usually 'yer man') or wife already. Bro calls his OH 'The wife'. But all of this is in D2D talk. They still fill in forms etc as single peeps, or co-habiting.

flower24

you're probably right...I would like a wedding not an extravagant one, but I'd want a nice dress and suit for him and nice clothes for the kids etc

the children have his name

hot.chick

my hubby got his tux from Matalan - I think it was £50, one of my wedding dresses was a monsoon one from Ebay £26 in delivey, you can have a lovely but simple wedding very cheaply.

Wedding cake from tesco - Give it some thought, lots of us can give tips too...

Rachel83

As far as I know it'd be around £50- £60 sorting out your name by deed poll, cost me nothing my aunt was a secetary for a solicitor
Got married this year in a registry office and they charged £100, not much of a mark up to do it for real .... Although cost me more than that as we went all out lol

thorsoak

You can call yourself whatever you like - but just calling yourself Mrs Brown instead of Miss Smith does not give you the legal status of Mrs Brown!

You don't have to go down the Bridezilla route of weddings - several friends f ours back in the 60s just paid the Registry Office fees, turned up three weeks later with two witnesses - came out 15 minutes later and then sometimes met up with friends at the pub later!

The cost of Registry Office wedding £43.50 - cost of official deed poll documents seem to start at £17.50 - so there isn't a great deal in it - unless you want the matching suits for OH & sons and matching dresses for you and daughters!

Good luck with whatever way you decide to go.

McKneff

Make it a challenge as to how cheap (meant in the nicest possible way)

Matalan, Primark. Make up your own bouquet from a bunch of morrison flowers,
Kids in their school uniforms, what more do you need. Make a teatime buffet before you go out.

Tell everyone afterwards,
Tell them to come to a party, bring your own food and a bottle.

(i think you secretly want to be a Mrs, dont you )
Good luck, whatever you decide.

flower24

Thanks everyone, I've been pondering both options for a while and just can't decide.

In an ideal world if we were flush I'd love a big wedding (as long as someone else organised it :rotfl:) but it's just not going to happen and the most important thing to me is the commitment and the name change, so I think we probably will end up doing a quickie wedding...just got to bite the bullet and book it now! thanks everyone x