depression

Sazbo

Miroslav wrote:

Disaster.

Why I ever thought she'd even like me or care about me, I never know.

Really thought she'd be different. Just like every other human being.

Total opposite of Thursday...............cold as ice, didn't want me there.

That's my final chance gone.

I don't care anymore.

Oh I'm so, so sorry to hear this, but please don't say that Miro it's not true. We care about you for a start hun. Can you tell us what happened? Did she give any indication why she was how she was - maybe she was having a bad day for some other reason, not connected to you? Please let us know you're ok sxxx

Tiff_2

Miroslav wrote:

Disaster.

Why I ever thought she'd even like me or care about me, I never know.

Really thought she'd be different. Just like every other human being.

Total opposite of Thursday...............cold as ice, didn't want me there.

That's my final chance gone.

I don't care anymore.

Hey Miro - sending out some looking after you vibes angel - and :grouphug: too.
I am so sorry.
I don't know what happened angel but tell us when you feel you can.
Could it be possible that she was having a bad time with her own issues?
From what you've said hun, she's very good at cancelling at the last minute but she didn't did she? So she was at least open to seeing you. I'm hoping that what's happened is that something/someone else upset her, she iced over and you're adopting the blame. Some people can't separate issues and take it out on those closest at that time - I don't know angel, these are just guesses.:undecided

Miroslav, she is not like every other human being - we are all different and I'll prove it to you.
Now you're sitting there feeling quite heartbroken but when you're ready, I want you to go back through all these posts, notice the support you get and give and all the thanks you get. Yes, we are all hundreds of miles apart from each other hun and we are only on the internet, but if you can't feel the warmth and friendship that we all feel for you and see it wrap around you when we see you hurting, then I guess I'm reading it wrong.
One way or another, we on this board have all been victims of something or another and I'm slowly learning something Miro.......it makes us better people! I don't think there's anyone here in this group of your friends, who could be malicious to someone else because we've already been on the other end of it.

Because of these very facts, you should now realise that the 'game' is not over yet. You've had a hard time but this week especially, you've been so funny sweetheart and so lively. It's good to see you like that. And whereas you need to pay dues to your sadness hun, you've got a life to live and it can be better.
I feel your grief for all you've been through angel - maybe you could talk to CRUSE about your bereavement, and get to a good counsellor to offload all the hurt you're feeling. I know that these are all separate issues for later but it's a way forward.
And I don't blame you angel. You're not on your own. I'd give the world to feel someone's arms around me, to hear someone's laughter - to hear my own laughter, to be in a relationship where I don't have to protect myself or worry what mood they'll be in when they come home, to do simple things like having to make 2 coffees instead of 1, to have someone to lie next to, to be half of a wonderful whole. (teary Tiff:o ) We haven't deserved the hand so far dealt but the game's still there to be played angel. You can get what you deserve angel.
We'll all be here for you hun when you're ready to talk. Sending huge hugs your way angel.
Much Love
Tiff
xxx

Miroslav

Sazbo wrote:

Oh I'm so, so sorry to hear this, but please don't say that Miro it's not true. We care about you for a start hun. Can you tell us what happened? Did she give any indication why she was how she was - maybe she was having a bad day for some other reason, not connected to you? Please let us know you're ok sxxx

Well, if you met me, you'd understand why no-one likes me. I try too hard, get used easily, and she saw me coming

She phoned my flatmate to say she was having a bad time and she was sorry if she gave me the wrong idea today, by being distant.

She should have cancelled.......i'd have been gutted, but it would have been better than today.

We agreed to meet Wednesday, but I don't think she'll show.

My flatmate says she still likes me, but I doubt it.

I was stupid enough to think she liked me, let alone anything else. Now you see why I don't try to get to know people, as they always hurt me, I'm just a loser.

Gotta decide what to do next. I have some ideas, no-one will agree with any of them, but who cares, I'm 30 and can look after myself, on my own, like I always have.

I thought she cared, I'm just !!!!!!! stupid!

Sazbo

A touching post, tiff and I mean that. xx

Tiff_2

Just don't get the yoghurt and the sledgehammer mixed up hun!:eek:;)
I hope both you and the car feel better quickly angel.
Tiff
xxx

Miroslav

Tiff wrote:

Hey Miro - sending out some looking after you vibes angel - and :grouphug: too.
I am so sorry.
I don't know what happened angel but tell us when you feel you can.
Could it be possible that she was having a bad time with her own issues?
From what you've said hun, she's very good at cancelling at the last minute but she didn't did she? So she was at least open to seeing you. I'm hoping that what's happened is that something/someone else upset her, she iced over and you're adopting the blame. Some people can't separate issues and take it out on those closest at that time - I don't know angel, these are just guesses.:undecided

Miroslav, she is not like every other human being - we are all different and I'll prove it to you.
Now you're sitting there feeling quite heartbroken but when you're ready, I want you to go back through all these posts, notice the support you get and give and all the thanks you get. Yes, we are all hundreds of miles apart from each other hun and we are only on the internet, but if you can't feel the warmth and friendship that we all feel for you and see it wrap around you when we see you hurting, then I guess I'm reading it wrong.
One way or another, we on this board have all been victims of something or another and I'm slowly learning something Miro.......it makes us better people! I don't think there's anyone here in this group of your friends, who could be malicious to someone else because we've already been on the other end of it.

Because of these very facts, you should now realise that the 'game' is not over yet. You've had a hard time but this week especially, you've been so funny sweetheart and so lively. It's good to see you like that. And whereas you need to pay dues to your sadness hun, you've got a life to live and it can be better.
I feel your grief for all you've been through angel - maybe you could talk to CRUSE about your bereavement, and get to a good counsellor to offload all the hurt you're feeling. I know that these are all separate issues for later but it's a way forward.
And I don't blame you angel. You're not on your own. I'd give the world to feel someone's arms around me, to hear someone's laughter - to hear my own laughter, to be in a relationship where I don't have to protect myself or worry what mood they'll be in when they come home, to do simple things like having to make 2 coffees instead of 1, to have someone to lie next to, to be half of a wonderful whole. (teary Tiff:o ) We haven't deserved the hand so far dealt but the game's still there to be played angel. You can get what you deserve angel.
We'll all be here for you hun when you're ready to talk. Sending huge hugs your way angel.
Much Love
Tiff
xxx

She just didn't want me there. She called me at 11.20 to ask if I was coming. I said if she wanted me too.........she said yes. But the whole 5 1/2 hours she didn't want me there, I can now see she thinks meeting me was a mistake.

I like reading people's replies here, but it's not here. I take alot of what people say here physically, i've been hurt AGAIN. I mean, I still care about her..........WHY? Maybe it is her issues, but she's hurt ME.

The happy Miro has gone, I nearly ended it all earlier, I don't want this pain anymore. I tried one last time, it didn't work.

I don't think there is anything for me.............if someone so sweet can hurt me, then what hope have I got? I asked for honesty from the beginning........she can't even do that.

I still care about her, but she'll not like me anymore, I'm just an idiot for thinking someone could care for me, I wish I never met her now

Sazbo

Miroslav wrote:

Well, if you met me, you'd understand why no-one likes me. I try too hard, get used easily, and she saw me coming

She phoned my flatmate to say she was having a bad time and she was sorry if she gave me the wrong idea today, by being distant.

She should have cancelled.......i'd have been gutted, but it would have been better than today.

We agreed to meet Wednesday, but I don't think she'll show.

My flatmate says she still likes me, but I doubt it.

I was stupid enough to think she liked me, let alone anything else. Now you see why I don't try to get to know people, as they always hurt me, I'm just a loser.

Gotta decide what to do next. I have some ideas, no-one will agree with any of them, but who cares, I'm 30 and can look after myself, on my own, like I always have.

I thought she cared, I'm just !!!!!!! stupid!

You are not stupid Miro love, and you ARE liked. She has at least agreed to see you again, I really don't think she would do that if she didn't like you? She said to your flatmate she was having a bad time, try not to right her off just yet hun, give her a chance. I know it's hard for you, you're very fragile and can't handle knocks like that, all any of us wants is to be wanted. I can't make that hurt go away - I wish for all the world I could. All I'm trying to say is it's early days yet hun, see how it goes. sxxx

Miroslav

Sazbo wrote:

You are not stupid Miro love, and you ARE liked. She has at least agreed to see you again, I really don't think she would do that if she didn't like you? She said to your flatmate she was having a bad time, try not to right her off just yet hun, give her a chance. I know it's hard for you, you're very fragile and can't handle knocks like that, all any of us wants is to be wanted. I can't make that hurt go away - I wish for all the world I could. All I'm trying to say is it's early days yet hun, see how it goes. sxxx

I'm not liked in real life. I think I must have something tattooed on my forehead.

She won't turn up. She's meeting flatmate tomorrow, I can only imagine what she will say to her, and flatmate will give me the bad news.

We agreed to honesty, yet she wasn't honest. She said she was fine to me...........why go running to my flatmate? She ignored most of what I said all day, I just wanted a response! She just didn't respond.

She was okay to have the TV on and laugh though...........yeah, really bad time.

Tiff_2

Sazbo wrote:

A touching post, tiff and I mean that. xx

Bless you Saz - I guess you can tell when something comes from the heart. Tiff xxx

feelinggood_2

Miro, I'm so sorry.
Stay strong. x