little_h's big dreams :)

little_h_2

Hi everyone, long time no diary entry!

Things all going well here, I've bought a car (chopped mine in and downsized....in price terms at least, the new (to me) car is massive!!).

I've cleared off the HP on the car with a loan and managed to get it on a cheaper interest rate to boot, so really pleased with that.

Big decisions and discussions are afoot with bf, we are talking about him moving in again in May. We will tackle things very differently this time and are discussing other permanent things too :j a big step for me given how long its taken me to let go of the guilt from my divorce!

Money wise things are doing OK, just had a big mileage payment from work for a road trip last week which will help cover a little overspend on a couple of bathroom plumbing extras, and my John Lewis card is nicely racking up points which I get vouchers for so I can put this towards nice christmas shopping or a new TV at the end of the year.

I am within budget on food and fuel this month which is positive so far. I am currently craving sweeties and wine which is not so positive but given its the time of the month (well, a week late but its not unusual so i am not worrying yet) its understandable. I have had a busy week so no doubt I will be wrecking all my good work and hitting the supermarket this evening - again within budget so at least thats not the end of the world.

My friend is having a wedding do in France at the end of August which I've been invited to, hopefully I can swap some clubcard points for ferry vouchers and this will be paid for. Should be a nice few days away

little_h_2

well it's been a while since the last diary entry and lots has happened.

I'm getting married again! :eek: in August this year! :j

true to the current state of mind, it will be a very MSE event, with a strict budget and only spending money on the essentials. With my newfound dedication and commitment to keeping myself on the straight and narrow, I am confident we will have the small ceremony and wonderful party for our nearest and dearest. The guest list is the bare essentials but we feel happy when we look at it as it really does encapsulate everyone who makes us happy and has contributed emotionally to the people we are now

bf will be moving back in in May which will help the finances hugely. I am looking at re-mortgaging the house as I need to pay my ex the £20k back from his share of the house. This will be a challenge with the level of debt I have but bf is very very supportive (especially since I have just spent a lot on the bathroom which he will be getting to enjoy!) and is committed to getting the debt down so we can get on with our lives.

hopefully by the end of the year we will be in a good position to move forwards together.

Overall non mortgage debt is down to about £25k, at it's worst it was nearly £29k (back in October last year) so I am pleased that it is going in the right direction.

Best of all, I am not spending loads of money on clothes, make up or anything naughty like that. I bought a new foundation from MAC last weekend but I know this will last me ages so for me it is £17 well spent. I only buy from them now as I know I only need to buy it once, rather than trying all manner of different things to end up going back there anyway!

I do need a couple of things for work but I will be trawling through my wardrobe tomorrow to see what I have so that I can just buy a skirt and a couple of tops to help make better use of what I have etc.

At times I feel like I will never get there but at least the summer is on the way which is lifting the spirits, and I am really looking forward to the wedding! :j

cloud_cuckoo_land

WOW!! I've just read through your whole thread and that last post took me completely by surprise!!

I'm so glad you and your bf are happy - If you re read our posts, they are always so much happier and upbeat when you are talking about him!

Congratulations on making the decision about your job and hope it's all working out for you - I'm subscribing so don't go disappearing for months on end.

P.S. My wedding was the ultimate in MSE but exactly what we wanted - we had a small, low key registry office wedding and a really really big party!! So big it got to the point we were carrying blank invitations in our pockets because we kept bumping into people we'd forgotton to invite!! In total it cost us 1500.00 for absolutely everything (although we did have help from friends and family with photographs, cake etc) and we got 1000.00 in vouchers and cash towards our honeymoon!! Thinking about it - we really should get married again!!:D

little_h_2

back again, it's been ages! I am on here less and less, and surprise surprise I am spending a little beyond my means again

obviously I need to stay in the habit!

My MSEness is well and truly ingrained now though, so I thought I would sahre my wedding dress shopping story from yesterday :mad:

I went to the lovely lovely bridal shop in town a couple of weeks ago, to get an appointment to try some dresses on. Although they are quite high prices, I wanted to get some ideas and also to have the dress trying experience which I didn't have the confidence to do first time round, plus my mum wanted to come too as she was so hands off last time

I explained that I wanted something shorter and that the budget was miniscule, the lady was lovely and recommended a range that would suit my budget and said that if not, I could always try bridesmaid dresses as they come in ivory (if I wanted ivory). So I looked at the range on the internet and it was indeed perfect, right up my street.

I found some prices for their bridesmaid dresses on an online prom shop, definitely within budget so I was pleased, plus the styles were lovely too, quite vintage and high volume - 50s prom dress style which was what I was after.

Anyway. I get to the bridal shop for my appointment yesterday, start trying on the frocks, and I am horrified to see that the premium for an ivory dress over pale pink or ice blue for this particular range, is a massive £200!

My entire budget for my outfit including shoes and headgear etc was £300 and I had already spent £99 (got a 10% discount as they were previously £110!) on the shoes so was looking at £200. The ones I had seen online were £235 to £275 so I felt confident.

I was stood there in a lovely dress that I was going to buy, at £475, and just find the extra somehow, when we asked about getting a shrug made up. This was going to be another £175 :eek: for something that wasn't even big enough to blow your nose on (I am five feet tall and size 8-10)

Then the lady started writing the size and length down, got them wrong even after I had said three times what I needed, and I started to come to my senses. We left the shop and I had a big cry all over my mum who didn't know what had hit her!

We ended up in my favourite department store, I now have a fabulous dress from Coast for £199 which looked very dull on the hanger but the nicest assistant ever practically frog marched me to the changing rooms at 5.25pm (they closed at 5.30) and was runnign round finding me accessories to match. We bought the dress and because it was so late the lights went out in the shop and I had to get dressed in the dark :rotfl:

Mum took pity, she bought the dress and a matching shrug and I have the look I wanted (even if it is not what I had planned at all!). I have grudgingly accepted the gift from my mum and all is calmer!

Bf has just got home so I will be back later xxx :money:

beanielou

Yipee to a great sounding dress

little_h_2

bought another dress! *blushing face!* Mum is annoyed as she prefers the other one but she can see why I prefer the new one. We are going to take the other one back on Sunday. The new one is MSE as well as being fabulous, 70% off a designer frock on theoutnet.com. I am over the moon (although h2b is being an idiot so at this rate there won't be a wedding! :rotfl:)

Lots going on here. I've started on weight watchers to try and get my weight back under control, only half a stone/10lb to shift but on a little person like me it's almost 2 dress sizes! :eek: It's going well so far, lost 2lb in just over a week.

It's pay day on Friday and each month it's getting shorter if that makes sense? The new job has proved good for the finances as hoped, and I have only spent a couple of quid (other than normal household/planned food and fuel expenses) over the last week or so! :eek:

Due to a few other things in May I will only have £20 to see me to the end of the month, but this feels manageable. I'm making my lunch each day and eating soup at home on my work from home days. So I will only need a bit of money for the odd magazine and a coffee with mum on Sunday. And a pub lunch with some friends in the middle of the month.

I've just opened a new credit card to balance transfer one of the £4500 balances to keep it at 0%. I only asked for a £5000 limit but got a £7500 one :mad: I will reduce it as soon as I get the card. I will also close the card that I am moving it from.

Things feel reasonably under control, had my first shower (at long last!!!) in my new bathroom this morning and although it has cost a lot of money, I am proud that I have achieved it without going out of control on the old finances. Most of it was bought at 50% (or more) off in the January "sales" (bit of a joke as B&Q have had 50% off bathrooms pretty much since January grrr!) and the rest has been meticulously researched so as to maximise every £££

I think I'm getting old and sensible! :money:

little_h_2

can't believe it, h2b is letting me down yet again over money and I am at breaking point. The only reason I haven't cancelled the whole thing is because I can't handle the shame of telling everyone it's over yet again.

also I don't want to send back the beautiful beautiful dress I'd bought to wear for the wedding (the one I bought with my mum is going back!). I have until tomorrow to decide whether to keep the dress. I got a serious designer bargain and would be heart broken if I had to return it. but its too much money to hang onto and not the sort of thing I would wear for any other occasion.

He has read all through this diary, knows how hard I have worked to get myself through this and he is still risking it anyway. Except this time he is putting our whole relationship on the line as well.

He owes me £724 by tomorrow and if he doesnt give me it I can't pay my credit card bill next week. I feel so sick and angry :mad: I have a back up plan (always try to) but it doesn't bode well.

I have lent him money before and he has been late giving it me back before, I feel like such a mug. I know he is being forgetful rather than deceitful or malicious, but he also knows how important this is to me.

I cannot face ending it but I also cannot face getting married while having such big massive doubts. If he's like this now, what would happen if we had children or something and I needed to rely on his income for a bit?

This is so scary. My mum is coming on Sunday and I can talk to her then, but she is getting fed up of picking up all the pieces each time it goes wrong between us.

he is such an idiot! :mad: and I feel an idiot too!

laura237

Just been reading your whole tread. We are so similar. I had a mini and totally loved it but had to down grade to a cheaper car and as im small too a corsa seems huge :rotfl:Also forget about my accountancy subscription but quite often rope the boss into paying it which does help.

Sorry i cant help with the h2b but im sure you will make the right decision, OH's can be such pains at times.

Good luck

little_h_2

thanks

had a really unproductive couple of work from home days, I really am beside myself with all this.

I'm on a diet to try and get into the frock and it has been really hard the last couple of days so I think I will be off to the supermarket for comfort pizza and some wine. Maybe just a small bottle so I don't have too much.

Supermarket is the danger zone as far as small unaccounted-for spending goes, but I am so low that food is about the only thing that will cheer me up. other than clothes or motorbike shopping but we all know where that leads! :eek:

Choc-addict

Hey,

Just read your whole diary - so many ups and downs for you of late. I really hope it all settles and you can be happy. Seems you have had a huge emotional time of late.

OH's are very frustrating at times, don't know what to advise I guess it depends how many times he has let you down before and whether or not you can get over it? Main thing is don't worry about what anyone else thinks, you are important in this and if something doesn't feel right then you have to act upon it or it'll just come back to bite you at a later point.

Keep your chin up and be kind to yourself. You are doing fab with everything that you have done so far and pop by to vent on your diary, it's a great way of getting things out

Have subscribed so will be sure to pop back again xx