Buffy Cracks the Egg Diary 2010

Pippajo

Don't ever apologise - that is what your diary is for.

There are many different versions of depression - you may not be depressed but you are certainly stressed and you are showing all the same symptoms as DH. The more stressed you are the harder it is to concentrate on the more important things, whether that be taking you time, or marking a set of books.

Especially with the headaches and bad tummy too - they started my DH on beta blockers, he has perfect blood pressure, ecg etc, but they work as well on blocking stress and headaches. Then other tablets followed due to side effects etc, BUT they are now all working together and he has had a few up and down days, but has been able to make some major decisions to improve his life where before he couldn't even think straight.

Friday - so look after yourself and enjoy the weekend (((((hugs)))))

x

Buffythedebtslayer

Thanks Pippajoxx

I am so tired tonight. bed early

got a declutter bookwhich seems good so far and a school organising book which is kinda rubbish.

xxxx night all xxxx

Shoe_Gal

Hi Buffy

Hope you are enjoying your Saturday - try to get some rest

Buffythedebtslayer

Well I had a nice morning until I started to feel ill, dizzy, cold light headed and generally weak. I also saw stars!

I have a lot of work to do but once I got home I had to go to bed, I was so tired. I will go to the doctors, I have had this feeling before (had a lot recently at work in the afternoon) and the doctor didn't find anything. It could just be tiredness. Plus my health must be suffering because of my overweightness. I hate being a big girl. I weighed myself on one of those machines in boots. Much worse than I thought.

I earn enough money to pay the debt off by December 31st. I am in such a fortunate position. I do waste such a lot of money. I have been doing better on lots of things. but to have debt free date SO possible is frustrating.

I know both in my head and on paper I am doing ok. upped my debt payments, social life is much better (altohugh currently missing my best friend).

I recognise when I am being hormonal and stroppy(!) and when I am tired, most of the time.

The three problems I am not making progress with are clutter (And i am still spending on books and stuff for the Gp's ) I am very worried about Mum's health and not really sure what to do about my future here and of course work.....

I have been dreaming on my walks (which are having no effect on my weight!!) of owning my own place. A clutter free wood floor, minimalist furniture with lots of book shelves..........and space for a big Guinea Pig cage.

I have all the tools available to move on and really focus. I debating whether or not to start a new diary challenge thing.

Might go have a read of my books and some diaries on here and see what I think.

xxxxx

beanielou

Great news on debt free date hun.
When you crack the clutter please let me as mine is getting worse if thats possible.
Hope you can get a GP's appointment soon.

Buffythedebtslayer

I have just written about 1500 on my clutter and reasons why I live in a mess.
It was uncomfortable.
Issues, stuff I won't write about here have come up that I have onl vaguely edged around before.

I really have a lot to do. It explained ever such a lot tho. feels weird.

xxxx

urg123

I love how you are Able to look at your self and try to get to the bottom of why you do the things you do. Self analysis is something I don't like to do. I know I have serious thinking to do about my career when I get back from honeymoon.

Hope you are feeling ok today.

Urg x x

Buffythedebtslayer

urg123 wrote: »

I love how you are Able to look at your self and try to get to the bottom of why you do the things you do. Self analysis is something I don't like to do. I know I have serious thinking to do about my career when I get back from honeymoon.

Hope you are feeling ok today.

Urg x x

well I do think I sound like a right poncy dipstick sometimes and it can be self indulgent if you do it too long! but last night did clear my head. Really thinking rather than just existing and repeating the same thing over and over.

Your wedding must be quite soon? how lovely hope you are all prepared:j xxxx

Shoe_Gal

Very brave to be so self aware - hope it helps you feel better :A

Buffythedebtslayer

I wrote a really long complicated post. And lost it.

How annoyed am I?

VERY.

short version

1. I did lots of gardening, 10 bags of rubble/dirt and weeds.
2. I am going to investigate the idea of getting a mortgage.

there was more explanation the first time but really I want a cup of tea

xxxx